The Long Hold Support Group

[[De...]]

Congrats ok :

[[Ma...]]

OK, that is so fabulous!!  Congratulations...... :clap: :balloon: :mybuddy: :smitten: 

 

Love you, Mary 💜💜💜💜

[[Me...]]

Wow that is awesome!  I’m happy for you!  The birth of a new life! 

❤️👍🙏

Meems

[[In...]]

Intend. How are you my friend?  Did your  eyes clear up or continue to bother you?  I still feel like screaming over IA :tickedoff:  I am getting ready to do one of our lovely showers, ugh.

How is Dan and my beautiful Pepper.  Hey, did you go to the movies?  Love ya, Mary 💜💜💜💜

 

 

espy, it's so good to see you posting and sounding so much better.  I know you aren't 💯 % yet, but the difference in you now and 3 months ago , is just amazing.  . I hope I don't find out you're  in the shine Cuz   Love you....your Hillbilly Cousin 💜💜💜💜

 

DDI hope those symptoms go away soon.  They would bother anyone.  You know I love ya, MM.

💜💜💜

 

I’m about “ok,” Mary.

 

Dan is kind of driving me nuts. This time it’s a GFCI plug in the downstairs bathroom. His shaving equipment tripped the breaker in the panel in the other room. I asked him if he flipped the breaker back and he said yes.

 

Doesn’t listen to a thing I say (on the good days when my voice is somewhat better). So we have to go to Lowes because he doesn’t like the stains at Home Depot because they stopped carrying Minwax stains and he’s seen Minwax at Lowes. Then he says (light bulb moment), oh, we can get the GFCI plug at Loews while we’re there. We buy it, and today he discovers that he didn’t flip the breaker after all. Everything would have been fine there if not for that one simple thing. So back to Loews.

 

My eyes still bother me somewhat. Not sure what’s going on. Seeing the eye doctor on Friday. A lot seems to depend on these dreaded showers. I’m just plain weak once I get out. And then the eyes. I never used to think twice about taking a shower before all this dumb stuff, but now I have to gear myself up.

 

Pepper is still the beautiful black cat she’s always been. Fiery just like the 🌶 Pepper she is sitting on top of the refrigerator.

 

We did go see the movie 1917 two weeks ago this Sunday. It’s loud with a lot of shooting and bombs exploding, but very entertaining. 💜❤️💜❤️

[[In...]]

Hi Friends!

Well today is my 44th birthday and I have some news. 5 days ago I forgot to take my dose in the morning and didn't remember until that night. I wondered.. should I take it now? Or just skip it and take the next dose tomorrow? Or should I just stop and see what happens? So I decided to do that. I am on day 5 of no Valium.. and I feel pretty much the same. So I guess I walked off (?) (!)

I'm of course monitoring myself very closely. I truly believe that my year and a half hold at 2mg has made walking of at .5 entirely possible. It allowed my body and brain to truly stabilize at the 2mg dose, which is a very small dose in the grand scheme of things. I think the reason 2mg was so hard before was because I was still in w/d from the other 15mg that I had tapered in the previous years.

Entering my 44th year has me reflecting on my 40's in general, they have really sucked! It was just after my 40th birthday that I started tapering the first time. So I'm really hoping that this is the year where things turn around for me. Ever so grateful for all of you LHSG'ers, and I'll keep you updated on how I am doing.

 

Love yous!

 

Good luck OK! Lucky you! ☘️ ☘️ ☘️

[[In...]]

By the way, it’s 20 degrees here late in the afternoon, and will drop to 10 degrees tonight.

 

Super cold. Freezing the wood putty Dan is using on one of his projects. Had to bring his project in also.

 

🧊 cube time here.

[[Ma...]]

Intend. How are you my friend?  Did your  eyes clear up or continue to bother you?  I still feel like screaming over IA :tickedoff:  I am getting ready to do one of our lovely showers, ugh.

How is Dan and my beautiful Pepper.  Hey, did you go to the movies?  Love ya, Mary 💜💜💜💜

 

 

espy, it's so good to see you posting and sounding so much better.  I know you aren't 💯 % yet, but the difference in you now and 3 months ago , is just amazing.  . I hope I don't find out you're  in the shine Cuz   Love you....your Hillbilly Cousin 💜💜💜💜

 

DDI hope those symptoms go away soon.  They would bother anyone.  You know I love ya, MM.

💜💜💜

 

I’m about “ok,” Mary.

 

Dan is kind of driving me nuts. This time it’s a GFCI plug in the downstairs bathroom. His shaving equipment tripped the breaker in the panel in the other room. I asked him if he flipped the breaker back and he said yes.

 

Doesn’t listen to a thing I say (on the good days when my voice is somewhat better). So we have to go to Lowes because he doesn’t like the stains at Home Depot because they stopped carrying Minwax stains and he’s seen Minwax at Lowes. Then he says (light bulb moment), oh, we can get the GFCI plug at Loews while we’re there. We buy it, and today he discovers that he didn’t flip the breaker after all. Everything would have been fine there if not for that one simple thing. So back to Loews.

 

My eyes still bother me somewhat. Not sure what’s going on. Seeing the eye doctor on Friday. A lot seems to depend on these dreaded showers. I’m just plain weak once I get out. And then the eyes. I never used to think twice about taking a shower before all this dumb stuff, but now I have to gear myself up.

 

Pepper is still the beautiful black cat she’s always been. Fiery just like the 🌶 Pepper she is sitting on top of the refrigerator.

 

Is this a bad day or a good day?  I didn't do to bad in the shower but I just woke up from an hour nap the shower caused.  Too weird, but we sure aren't the only ones it's happening too.  Stut has to lay on her bed when she gets out.  Glad my Pepper is fiesty  . And wish you didn't have to go to Lowes all the time. 

 

There is another movie coming out, can't remember name, that looks really good and doesn't look like it's going to be noisy.  I will tell you name as soon as I see it again. 

Love you woman, MM.  🌹🌹🚂🚂🚂🐈🐾🐾

 

We did go see the movie 1917 two weeks ago this Sunday. It’s loud with a lot of shooting and bombs exploding, but very entertaining. 💜❤️💜❤️

 

I will be interested to hear what the Dr says about your eyes.  I really believe the specialist did at least one procedure he could have waited to do for quite awhile.  I truly don't believe it did anything.

 

[[Ma...]]

By the way, it’s 20 degrees here late in the afternoon, and will drop to 10 degrees tonight.

 

Super cold. Freezing the wood putty Dan is using on one of his projects. Had to bring his project in also.

 

🧊 cube time here.

 

OMG, 40 here tomorrow, 10 I would freeze to death, are you going to have any precipitation?

[[In...]]

By the way, it’s 20 degrees here late in the afternoon, and will drop to 10 degrees tonight.

 

Super cold. Freezing the wood putty Dan is using on one of his projects. Had to bring his project in also.

 

🧊 cube time here.

 

OMG, 40 here tomorrow, 10 I would freeze to death, are you going to have any precipitation?

 

I think there’s a 10 % chance of snow tonight according to the weather channel. I get irritated at the weather channel because they focus too much on the eastern part of the US. But a 10% chance means nothing in this area. Because of all these mountains, these weather people here hardly ever get it right.

 

I sure do get cold. Dan just came in, and he’s laying on the couch and wanted the fire on. And now Pepper is in front of it also. 🔥 We all get cold. You can see your breath when you go outside.

 

Hey everyone, be sure to watch the State of the Union tonight. I’m going to “love it.” 🤢 💩 🤮

[[Ma...]]

By the way, it’s 20 degrees here late in the afternoon, and will drop to 10 degrees tonight.

 

Super cold. Freezing the wood putty Dan is using on one of his projects. Had to bring his project in also.

 

🧊 cube time here.

 

 

OMG, 40 here tomorrow, 10 I would freeze to death, are you going to have any precipitation?

 

I think there’s a 10 % chance of snow tonight according to the weather channel. I get irritated at the weather channel because they focus too much on the eastern part of the US. But a 10% chance means nothing in this area. Because of all these mountains, these weather people here hardly ever get it right.

 

I sure do get cold. Dan just came in, and he’s laying on the couch and wanted the fire on. And now Pepper is in front of it also. 🔥 We all get cold. You can see your breath when you go outside.

 

Hey everyone, be sure to watch the State of the Union tonight. I’m going to “love it.” 🤢 💩 🤮

I know you will  .

[[Ol...]]

Thanks everyone for all the love!

Intend.. Brrrr! That sounds very cold! I have only ever lived on the west coast where 40 is cold.. Lots of rain though.

I won't be watching the state of the union.. ugh!

[[Me...]]

Intend, I’d rather pull out every one of my fingernails one by one than watch the State of the Union! My sxs will be revved up through the roof.  🤮

[[In...]]

Thanks everyone for all the love!

Intend.. Brrrr! That sounds very cold! I have only ever lived on the west coast where 40 is cold.. Lots of rain though.

I won't be watching the state of the union.. ugh!

 

OK,I’m from Oregon so I know all about the rain. Born in Portland and lived in Toledo, Newport. Lincoln City, Astoria and  Corvallis.

 

We came here for Dan  to work on the Denver and Rio Grand Railroad which is now the Union Pacific Railroad. 🚂 🚞

 

I’m not fond of our lovely presidents voice so it’s kind of a tossup if we watch or not. We were in the middle of a Netflix movie last night, so maybe we’ll finish that. But I love how he goes off script and talks 💩 and 🤮.

 

Gosh, better get in that shower before I miss all the fun. 

[[Ma...]]

I have to admit, I can't watch either......

[[In...]]

Intend, I’d rather pull out every one of my fingernails one by one than watch the State of the Union! My sxs will be revved up through the roof.  🤮

 

Well, it hasn’t started yet here, so I’ll dash to the shower and hope for the best. Dan will change the channel anyway. We both get kind of sick when we hear “a certain voice.” I’ll be revved also Meems!

[[Ol...]]

Thanks everyone for all the love!

Intend.. Brrrr! That sounds very cold! I have only ever lived on the west coast where 40 is cold.. Lots of rain though.

I won't be watching the state of the union.. ugh!

 

OK,I’m from Oregon so I know all about the rain. Born in Portland and lived in Toledo, Newport. Lincoln City, Astoria and  Corvallis.

 

We came here for Dan  to work on the Denver and Rio Grand Railroad which is now the Union Pacific Railroad. 🚂 🚞

 

I’m not fond of our lovely presidents voice so it’s kind of a tossup if we watch or not. We were in the middle of a Netflix movie last night, so maybe we’ll finish that. But I love how he goes off script and talks 💩 and 🤮.

 

Gosh, better get in that shower before I miss all the fun. 

 

I'm a Portlander as well! I have lived here 15 years.. now I kind of go back and forth between here and Santa Cruz where my mom lives.. leave it to benzo w/d to have you move back in with your mom in your 40's... but it has been nice to spend more time with her. Intend you have lived some wonderful places! My ex lived in Astoria for awhile.. oh man, that was the MOST rain I have ever experienced.

 

[[In...]]

Thanks everyone for all the love!

Intend.. Brrrr! That sounds very cold! I have only ever lived on the west coast where 40 is cold.. Lots of rain though.

I won't be watching the state of the union.. ugh!

 

OK,I’m from Oregon so I know all about the rain. Born in Portland and lived in Toledo, Newport. Lincoln City, Astoria and  Corvallis.

 

We came here for Dan  to work on the Denver and Rio Grand Railroad which is now the Union Pacific Railroad. 🚂 🚞

 

I’m not fond of our lovely presidents voice so it’s kind of a tossup if we watch or not. We were in the middle of a Netflix movie last night, so maybe we’ll finish that. But I love how he goes off script and talks 💩 and 🤮.

 

Gosh, better get in that shower before I miss all the fun. 

 

I'm a Portlander as well! I have lived here 15 years.. now I kind of go back and forth between here and Santa Cruz where my mom lives.. leave it to benzo w/d to have you move back in with your mom in your 40's... but it has been nice to spend more time with her. Intend you have lived some wonderful places! My ex lived in Astoria for awhile.. oh man, that was the MOST rain I have ever experienced.

 

I absolutely love Oregon OK! And I’m a map person. Those old paper maps that you could get at gas stations. So when we went to Oregon to see my family, I’d read those maps for fun. Very interesting how many tiny towns there are in Oregon and all that States.

 

Dan finally bought a big book of maps of all the states. We found Dans hometown of San Patricio, New Mexico which is pretty much farmland.

 

Ever been to the Hoodoo Ski Area? Neat place. And  Madras Oregon is where River Phoenix was born. And that film Stand by me was made in Castle Rock, Oregon.

 

I can never forget Astoria. They had just started  that huge bridge that crosses into Washington State when we moved to Corvallis. And rain is the number 1 thing along the coast of Oregon.

 

I made it out of the shower just in time to see the State of the Union. Interesting....

[[St...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Olive woohoo 🎊🎉 a double celebration birthday and taper ended.Well done honey.You should be very proud of yourself.l have no doubt you will be fine.l am delighted you did what you did.The hold did allow you to taper the last few mgs.I hope you don't disappear now l for one would miss you.Happy birthday and happy healing 😘. love you.X

Morning Trish l am so sorry you are going through this my lovely twin.life is so hard however l believe this is going to help you tremendously.l have always had a problem with this notion of control.l do think a lot of people with anxiety feel the need to control their environment as they feel a lack of control in themselves.lt can actually make things so much worse as they fall apart when that control slips.l learned a long time ago l have no control and it has kinda been great to have that burden lifted off me.lt does take time to let go however l am proof that it can be done.You can do this honey.love you my lST X

Morning Janice l think you will see that everyone that has been in hospital have been given their medication.l also agree with Esperanza regarding your self talk.l am all for realism however your going down the pessimistic route.l have no doubt you will recover honey however it is going to take a long time and you must work on yourself and stop feeding your fears.l hope your appointment went well.love you.X

Morning Intend l think you should move to a house beside a DIY store and Dan could dander in and out on his own.Save you a lot of bother.Have you tried any of the suggestions l have regarding the shower?It could help.Stay warm honey and stop watching that man with the weird hair.love to you and Dan.X

. Morning Meems l think a slow taper definitely eases the acute phase for most people.l am not sure if it helps everyone however for a lot of people it has.lt does make sense that it would.love you.X

Morning Suzy l hope your alright.l read the 666 post honestly it is just your anxious brain scaring you.You aren't doing anything wrong honey it just is a long slow process.Stay strong.love you.X

Morning Troch how are you today?l am glad you got out for a ride yesterday.Exercise is definitely good for us.Do what you can honey and know you will get through this.love you.X

Morning Lady Mary well hen when is your bil visiting?l know you will enjoy them being there.l think it is about time you had a little normal in your life.l have to go to my older sister's today it's her birthday so will see what she wants to do.love you my lady Mary HenX

Morning GP Gilly Valley Free Bill Miyu Espy Nova Final and everyone here sending you my love.X

[[Tr...]]

Hi Stut,

 

Doing more or less OK at the moment. Had an appointment with my psychologist this morning.  We agreed to work on a plan, that's gets me out of the house more and try doing nice things. " Worry less, enjoy more" you could say.

It's another fine and sunny day, so I ' ll be going for a bike ride again this afternoon.  Walking hurts right now, so biking is a good alternative.

 

Hope your day is a good one. X

[[Ma...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Olive woohoo 🎊🎉 a double celebration birthday and taper ended.Well done honey.You should be very proud of yourself.l have no doubt you will be fine.l am delighted you did what you did.The hold did allow you to taper the last few mgs.I hope you don't disappear now l for one would miss you.Happy birthday and happy healing 😘. love you.X

Morning Trish l am so sorry you are going through this my lovely twin.life is so hard however l believe this is going to help you tremendously.l have always had a problem with this notion of control.l do think a lot of people with anxiety feel the need to control their environment as they feel a lack of control in themselves.lt can actually make things so much worse as they fall apart when that control slips.l learned a long time ago l have no control and it has kinda been great to have that burden lifted off me.lt does take time to let go however l am proof that it can be done.You can do this honey.love you my lST X

Morning Janice l think you will see that everyone that has been in hospital have been given their medication.l also agree with Esperanza regarding your self talk.l am all for realism however your going down the pessimistic route.l have no doubt you will recover honey however it is going to take a long time and you must work on yourself and stop feeding your fears.l hope your appointment went well.love you.X

Morning Intend l think you should move to a house beside a DIY store and Dan could dander in and out on his own.Save you a lot of bother.Have you tried any of the suggestions l have regarding the shower?It could help.Stay warm honey and stop watching that man with the weird hair.love to you and Dan.X

. Morning Meems l think a slow taper definitely eases the acute phase for most people.l am not sure if it helps everyone however for a lot of people it has.lt does make sense that it would.love you.X

Morning Suzy l hope your alright.l read the 666 post honestly it is just your anxious brain scaring you.You aren't doing anything wrong honey it just is a long slow process.Stay strong.love you.X

Morning Troch how are you today?l am glad you got out for a ride yesterday.Exercise is definitely good for us.Do what you can honey and know you will get through this.love you.X

Morning Lady Mary well hen when is your bil visiting?l know you will enjoy them being there.l think it is about time you had a little normal in your life.l have to go to my older sister's today it's her birthday so will see what she wants to do.love you my lady Mary HenX

Morning GP Gilly Valley Free Bill Miyu Espy Nova Final and everyone here sending you my love.X

 

Intend, Stut had best idea ever, move within walking distance of Lowes, lol  :D.

 

OK,  I got so excited about your jump, I forgot to wish you a  .  :smitten:

I am with Stut, we would all miss you if you disappear  .  Love you, Mary 💜💜💜💜

[[Ma...]]

DD, I am worried about you girlfriend.  Hope those symptoms ease and go away quickly.  I love you!!

MM. 💜💜💜

[[Fi...]]

Hi Friends!

Well today is my 44th birthday and I have some news. 5 days ago I forgot to take my dose in the morning and didn't remember until that night. I wondered.. should I take it now? Or just skip it and take the next dose tomorrow? Or should I just stop and see what happens? So I decided to do that. I am on day 5 of no Valium.. and I feel pretty much the same. So I guess I walked off (?) (!)

I'm of course monitoring myself very closely. I truly believe that my year and a half hold at 2mg has made walking of at .5 entirely possible. It allowed my body and brain to truly stabilize at the 2mg dose, which is a very small dose in the grand scheme of things. I think the reason 2mg was so hard before was because I was still in w/d from the other 15mg that I had tapered in the previous years.

Entering my 44th year has me reflecting on my 40's in general, they have really sucked! It was just after my 40th birthday that I started tapering the first time. So I'm really hoping that this is the year where things turn around for me. Ever so grateful for all of you LHSG'ers, and I'll keep you updated on how I am doing.

 

Love yous!

 

Congratulations Olive Kitty.  Its amazing how our bodies can guide us to when it's time to stop.  Wishing you continues stability and healing moving forward. 

 

FH

[[Me...]]

Olive Kitty forgot to wish you a happy bday!  44 is so young!  I’ll be 50 in August.

Troch- I gotta get out and take a walk.  A little nippy here in So Cal but I always feel better getting out of this house.  If I get a major dizzy spell and panic attack, so be it.  I will just have to sit down until it passes.  I just want to reframe my thinking about this agoraphobia.  I did just go to CVS to buy some journaling notebooks and stood in line with my jelly legs.  I of course was pissed about the long line but I just think, if I fall over and spasm then it will make for a good ride with some handsome paramedic firefighters. 

Love you all

Meems😍

[[De...]]

Thank you Stut and mm,

 

I am ok now. I'll never be able to describe what my mind was thinking. I was thinking of the past when this first happened and it felt like something was out to get me. Really spiritual. Then I got that feeling again and it freaked me out. I was going as meeting back then and my sponsor was very holy.  Plus they say god will send you signs. So when I went bad of my meds my hair and skin were messed up. Peeling. I thought I was going to die. Ok. I dont want to trigger anyone. It was probably a combo of hormones, thyroid and med switches.. so when 8 had those feeling again probably triggered by the thyroid updose, idk? I thought it was happening again. The last three yrs were really bad. I'm ok now that I'm here. I could never explain if I tried. Anyway, I am leveling out and am trying to believe that won't happen again.  I swear this weord crap could only happen to me. Ly you guys dd :smitten:

[[De...]]

Good job memes, I've been there. That anxiety will bet better little by slowly. The more you keep going out and doing things. Now, I dont care. I go everywhere and I dont have that anxiety anymore.  :smitten: