The Long Hold Support Group

[[Ma...]]

Hey everyone, looks like it's been quiet around here today I hope that's a good thing 🤔.. sending love to all of you.

 

Yoo hoo friend Bill this is Trish sending you a wellness check in post. Let us know how you are dear friend.

 

Thinking of all of you peeps in the LHSG. Love to you all.

 

TT, ❤️

 

Love you too, Too Many!  And yes Bill , an update from you is always very welcome, Mary 

[[St...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Lady Mary, Trish, Suzy thank you my lovely friends don't be worrying l am doing ok just perhaps a little flat.We have all been there it is just one of the joys of tapering 😱.Sis is good l was actually looking at her the other day and she hasn't a wrinkle on her face she hasn't any stress and she has skin like a twenty year old.l on the other hand 😵. Took Auntie home yesterday and got her settled back in.lt is going to take time to get her confidence back so patience is the key.Sad to see but such is life.l hope you all have a better day my beauties and just keep on keeping on.love you.X

Thank you Janice and good morning.l know l am doing what is right for me.l know there will be people reading that will be thinking just stop or push through.That is absolutely their right to do however l will always follow my gut.lt isn't fear that is guiding me it is belief that we heal on the way down.Yes we need to be fully off to fully heal however the less drug the more we heal.If l am wrong l will be the first to say so however l believe from the evidence l have saw here that l am right for most people.l hope you enjoy your day honey.love you.X

Morning Troch, Intend Gilly Valley Free Meems Esperanza NJ Nova Miyu Final Bill Olive and everyone here sending you my love hoping everyone has a withdrawal free day.X

[[va...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Lady Mary, Trish, Suzy thank you my lovely friends don't be worrying l am doing ok just perhaps a little flat.We have all been there it is just one of the joys of tapering 😱.Sis is good l was actually looking at her the other day and she hasn't a wrinkle on her face she hasn't any stress and she has skin like a twenty year old.l on the other hand 😵. Took Auntie home yesterday and got her settled back in.lt is going to take time to get her confidence back so patience is the key.Sad to see but such is life.l hope you all have a better day my beauties and just keep on keeping on.love you.X

Thank you Janice and good morning.l know l am doing what is right for me.l know there will be people reading that will be thinking just stop or push through.That is absolutely their right to do however l will always follow my gut.lt isn't fear that is guiding me it is belief that we heal on the way down.Yes we need to be fully off to fully heal however the less drug the more we heal.If l am wrong l will be the first to say so however l believe from the evidence l have saw here that l am right for most people.l hope you enjoy your day honey.love you.X

Morning Troch, Intend Gilly Valley Free Meems Esperanza NJ Nova Miyu Final Bill Olive and everyone here sending you my love hoping everyone has a withdrawal free day.X

 

Stutt you are so absolutely right here sister. I'm reading a couple blogs of people who jumped at 0.5 after being very symptomatic, and they went into acute wd and it's lasting months. I can't help thinking that had they held at 0.5 for months, they could've walked off without this situation which can compromise your taper (as some in their agony consider reinstatement), plus, it completely incapacitates you to handle your responsibilities. If we can avoid this, we should. I don't know if I'll ever get to your dose. Time will tell because many things happen in life that could ruin a taper. We'll see. However, I know that I have learned a lot from you, Begood, Gardener... and those are the tapers I look at as a reference to what I want to do myself. At least that's my intention. This will take three years minimum for me, or more, who knows. I still have the darn fear of being hospitalized and the staff at the hospital messing my taper. I'll have to live with that the same as Trotch lives with health anxiety.

 

You just keep on holding Stutt. What's the rush anyway? Why risk a bad outcome? Have a nice day. I'm glad your sister is more calm. I wonder how your aunt is going to manage at home. Is there any help apart from you? I hope there is. You can't save the whole world, you know that don't you?

[[St...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Lady Mary, Trish, Suzy thank you my lovely friends don't be worrying l am doing ok just perhaps a little flat.We have all been there it is just one of the joys of tapering 😱.Sis is good l was actually looking at her the other day and she hasn't a wrinkle on her face she hasn't any stress and she has skin like a twenty year old.l on the other hand 😵. Took Auntie home yesterday and got her settled back in.lt is going to take time to get her confidence back so patience is the key.Sad to see but such is life.l hope you all have a better day my beauties and just keep on keeping on.love you.X

Thank you Janice and good morning.l know l am doing what is right for me.l know there will be people reading that will be thinking just stop or push through.That is absolutely their right to do however l will always follow my gut.lt isn't fear that is guiding me it is belief that we heal on the way down.Yes we need to be fully off to fully heal however the less drug the more we heal.If l am wrong l will be the first to say so however l believe from the evidence l have saw here that l am right for most people.l hope you enjoy your day honey.love you.X

Morning Troch, Intend Gilly Valley Free Meems Esperanza NJ Nova Miyu Final Bill Olive and everyone here sending you my love hoping everyone has a withdrawal free day.X

 

Stutt you are so absolutely right here sister. I'm reading a couple blogs of people who jumped at 0.5 after being very symptomatic, and they went into acute wd and it's lasting months. I can't help thinking that had they held at 0.5 for months, they could've walked off without this situation which can compromise your taper (as some in their agony consider reinstatement), plus, it completely incapacitates you to handle your responsibilities. If we can avoid this, we should. I don't know if I'll ever get to your dose. Time will tell because many things happen in life that could ruin a taper. We'll see. However, I know that I have learned a lot from you, Begood, Gardener... and those are the tapers I look at as a reference to what I want to do myself. At least that's my intention. This will take three years minimum for me, or more, who knows. I still have the darn fear of being hospitalized and the staff at the hospital messing my taper. I'll have to live with that the same as Trotch lives with health anxiety.

 

You just keep on holding Stutt. What's the rush anyway? Why risk a bad outcome? Have a nice day. I'm glad your sister is more calm. I wonder how your aunt is going to manage at home. Is there any help apart from you? I hope there is. You can't save the whole world, you know that don't you?

Morning Janice glad we have helped.l don't see why l would risk everything l have worked hard for at this stage.l have been in the pits of hell because of my own stupidity and l will not do that again.We learn as we go.

  I think Janice you will taper again however that really must be your decision.l will never push anyone to get off a drug.

My Aunt has carers set up to go in 3 times a day so that is a bonus.l live about 5 minutes away so it's no hardship to pop in and make sure she's ok.She is an amazing lady and l have no doubt she will be ok.

I hope you have a better day honey l know you have a lot of fear but l know it will ease off.love you.X

[[Tr...]]

Hi,

 

Went to the hospital to have x-rays taken of hip and thigh: no wear, nothing bad in the bone, but very tight muscles and tendons. Saw the ortho Dr.  Nice guy. Very understanding.

Going to have PT for those tendons. Hope it will work.

So my health anxious mind is set at ease again, for a while anyway...

 

Hoping for better times to come.

 

PS.  this Dr. was very benzo wise! Knew a lot about the need to go slow. Makes a change for once...doesn't it.

[[De...]]

Hi stut,

I am sorry you are having sx. I hate that flat feeling. I get it to on and of. I think you wre smart to go slow and you can slife of. You have been doing great and tapering wisely.  Just listen to your body and intuition and you will do this! I know it. My sx have been weird. My mind gets jumbled up and fear and terror.  I almost feel like it did after i got sober 3 1/2 years ago. It was so scary. I was tapering my k and then was cut off and i felt so strange. I hate even thinking about it. Im afraid it will hapoen again. Like god is punishing me. I went to an aa meeting today. I was agraid to go to them because it happened when i was going to meetings. So i figured i need to conquer my fear and go.  Maybe the fear is yelling me something. So i went with it. I never had such confusion. Man. Maybe its a healing surge because i am working on myself kind of. I donr know. Maybe its the thyrpid medicine. Ok rhis is embarrassing and you guys will think im crazy. Only me vould get myself into a jam like this. Is your head spinning. Sorry.  I hope i dont trigger anyone. I doubt anyone else wupl ever feel this. Its just me. I was normal once l. Ly Suzy

[[De...]]

Hi troch,

I am so happy all you tests came out ok. Good like with pt! Lt dd

[[Fi...]]

Hi everyone, checking in. 

 

I haven't been able to keep up with all the posts so please bear with me. 

 

Feeling the usual up and down during my taper. Had a good day yesterday but then no real sleep last night so my mood is low.  I did finish all my classes for my professional requirements and just renewed today.  I hope I can return to it more fully some day.

 

DD. Whether ae are tapering or not, the medication still has side effects.  Klonipin can cause high anxiety and I too have experienced terror and fear while on it.  Its irrational but it doesn't seem to register in my mind.  I say this because its not our fault we feel afraid.

 

Stut, I'm glad your aunt is home and has a good spirit.  That is so interesting what you have observed about your sisters face.  My face is so strained and reflects the effort of getting off medication.  I also hear you are on your path and following your heart.  That's all we can do.

 

Memes, I was a caretaker for my mom too who could be very difficult at times.  Very exhausting and emotionally draining. I loved her but it was hard. 

 

Troch, I was cleared for active Lyme too and it was a relief.  I'm glad all other tests have been clear.

 

VMN, I really admire how you can work at this time feeling the way you feel. 

 

Mary, Trish, Intend, Olive, Bill, GP, Espy, Gilly and everyone else, wishing you a decent and tolerable day in withdrawal.

 

Final Healing

[[Tr...]]

Hello everyone, just popping in to have a peek👀 around.. Hope everyone is having a decent day.

Suzy, omg when I tapered mega doses in the beginning of this journey I felt like Janet from another planet. I clawed my husband's chest and tore his shirt screaming you can't help me nobody can, I'm going to die, I'm going to die..I have tears in my eyes thinking about it. It was the worst mental state I have ever been in. I ended up in the psyche ward at the hospital for half a night. Drs there knew it was the large decrease in dosage and wanted me back on 2 mgs!! They talked to my prescribing Dr at the time who only got angry and I mean very angry with me that I couldn't handle his taper schedule!! He's a piece of shit and I only hope God has or will give him what he deserves. I don't want you to ever feel crazy, you're not it's the damn drug and tapering it is no joke! This is the most challenging thing I've ever done. It still amazes me the power benzo's have on our systems. Be kind to yourself and always remember it's not you it's your benzo😉❤️

 

Twinny!! I'm sorry you're in the dumps and I totally get it.. We all do and we've all been there. I'm glad it's nothing more than that. I know you'll bounce right out of this but a few suggestions.. How about a marvel marathon 😃.. or a walk on the beach 😃.. or plan a getaway with your daughter 😃.. or you can visualize me and Mary wearing one of those beautiful bridesmaids dresses GP picked out for your wedding!! 😂😂.. You keep that chin up twinny whatever you do and know we are always here for you too!

Love you woman!

LST ❤️

 

Well kids I hope to be back later I'm going to my daughter in law's ultrasound today to have a peek at my grandchild 😍.. I can't wait for this little bean to be born! Her due date is July 23rd! 😃.. Now I wonder.. Boy or girl?? 🤔.. We'll find out probably end of February beginning of March! Now March is my birthday month and I want a big celebration ( hint to Mary)!😂😂

 

Peace my friend's ✌️❤️ TT 😁

[[De...]]

Hi fh,

You sound good. I am glad yoy are tsking classes. You have done so much healing! Thank you i serioysly am terrified. I thoufht i has ptsd. Omg. I probably do. I didnt knoe the side effects could csuse such terror fear and confusion. Horrible. Makes yoy think your crazy and if you be you it will happen again. I cant wait till we ate done with this. Sometimes i feel as if i am getting worse. But im doing more normal things and you are too so we must be getting better walking through the fire. Omg. Never again. Ly dd

[[Fi...]]

Hi fh,

You sound good. I am glad yoy are tsking classes. You have done so much healing! Thank you i serioysly am terrified. I thoufht i has ptsd. Omg. I probably do. I didnt knoe the side effects could csuse such terror fear and confusion. Horrible. Makes yoy think your crazy and if you be you it will happen again. I cant wait till we ate done with this. Sometimes i feel as if i am getting worse. But im doing more normal things and you are too so we must be getting better walking through the fire. Omg. Never again. Ly dd

 

Never again. 

 

Yes, our brains go into a high state of alarm on benzos and sometimes it doesn't matter what we are doing. 

 

This has been one of my biggest challenges in tapering a benzo. I can be holding and feel terrible.  I can cut and feel better, I can cut and feel lousy.  All my other medication tapers had specific patterns when I tapered but this is very different. 

 

You will get there DD, you had some okay days recently and that to me is signs of healing. 

[[De...]]

Thanks fh. I get the same with benzos. You feel like your losing your mind. The windows and waves messes with your head even when you know its the process. You start doubting your mind. Thank you for saying im getting better. Thank you for not judging me and thinking im nuts. Yoy stay strong kerp walking and learning and taking your classes. You are going to get better. 

[[Ma...]]

Hey everyone, missed you.  Was having the sads and just not much of a talker, trying to work my way out of it 

DD, did you get thyroid results yet? 

Trouch, glad your tests came back good.  I had so many tests, I just refuse to have anymore.  I paid way too much money to keep hearing things are fine  .

Trishy, if you want a big birthday celebration, just make sure you remind me the day before, lol. 

Stut, so glad to hear Auntie has help and that you live so close....That is bound to help her relax sooner, Vali was right, you can't take care of everyone.  I hate the sads, they are draining and are not us.  . I love you woman and promise not to show up in one of those bridesmaids dresses anywhere  .

FH, congratulations on finishing your tests!  Well done 

GP, I don't think I saw a post from you, hope you are okay my friend and all 72 lbs of Reba is loving on you. 

 

Love you guys!!  Mary 💜💜💜

[[De...]]

Hi mm,

I didn't yet. Had the whole panel done yesterday. I am sorry you have the sad.  hope it doesnt last. I pop in and out of it. Talk if you want. We are here. Ly dd

[[Fi...]]

Hey everyone, missed you.  Was having the sads and just not much of a talker, trying to work my way out of it 

DD, did you get thyroid results yet? 

Trouch, glad your tests came back good.  I had so many tests, I just refuse to have anymore.  I paid way too much money to keep hearing things are fine  .

Trishy, if you want a big birthday celebration, just make sure you remind me the day before, lol. 

Stut, so glad to hear Auntie has help and that you live so close....That is bound to help her relax sooner, Vali was right, you can't take care of everyone.  I hate the sads, they are draining and are not us.  . I love you woman and promise not to show up in one of those bridesmaids dresses anywhere  .

FH, congratulations on finishing your tests!  Well done 

GP, I don't think I saw a post from you, hope you are okay my friend and all 72 lbs of Reba is loving on you. 

 

Love you guys!!  Mary 💜💜💜

 

Thanks Mary.  I'm sorry you had the sads.  I too sometimes pull inward to work my way out. 

 

I am hoping things will shift tonight and tomorrow for you. 

[[Tr...]]

Hey everyone, missed you.  Was having the sads and just not much of a talker, trying to work my way out of it 

DD, did you get thyroid results yet? 

Trouch, glad your tests came back good.  I had so many tests, I just refuse to have anymore.  I paid way too much money to keep hearing things are fine  .

Trishy, if you want a big birthday celebration, just make sure you remind me the day before, lol. 

Stut, so glad to hear Auntie has help and that you live so close....That is bound to help her relax sooner, Vali was right, you can't take care of everyone.  I hate the sads, they are draining and are not us.  . I love you woman and promise not to show up in one of those bridesmaids dresses anywhere  .

FH, congratulations on finishing your tests!  Well done 

GP, I don't think I saw a post from you, hope you are okay my friend and all 72 lbs of Reba is loving on you. 

 

Love you guys!!  Mary 💜💜💜

Sorry mmmmm's that you had the sads, I hate when that happens. I hope you're feeling better girlfriend. Hopefully tomorrow will be a much better day for you. Big hugs for you! 

I went with my daughter in law for her ultrasound of the baby, she's measuring 15 weeks pregnant and was able to tell us the sex , it's a boy! 😍 grandson number 2 on the way..I think I'll go out and buy something blue tomorrow

 

How's your enso? Are you still getting relief from using it?

Love you woman TT, tickled blue? 🤔😁

[[Ma...]]

Hey everyone, missed you.  Was having the sads and just not much of a talker, trying to work my way out of it 

DD, did you get thyroid results yet? 

Trouch, glad your tests came back good.  I had so many tests, I just refuse to have anymore.  I paid way too much money to keep hearing things are fine  .

Trishy, if you want a big birthday celebration, just make sure you remind me the day before, lol. 

Stut, so glad to hear Auntie has help and that you live so close....That is bound to help her relax sooner, Vali was right, you can't take care of everyone.  I hate the sads, they are draining and are not us.  . I love you woman and promise not to show up in one of those bridesmaids dresses anywhere  .

FH, congratulations on finishing your tests!  Well done 

GP, I don't think I saw a post from you, hope you are okay my friend and all 72 lbs of Reba is loving on you. 

 

Love you guys!!  Mary 💜💜💜

Sorry mmmmm's that you had the sads, I hate when that happens. I hope you're feeling better girlfriend. Hopefully tomorrow will be a much better day for you. Big hugs for you! 

I went with my daughter in law for her ultrasound of the baby, she's measuring 15 weeks pregnant and was able to tell us the sex , it's a boy! 😍 grandson number 2 on the way..I think I'll go out and buy something blue tomorrow

 

How's your enso? Are you still getting relief from using it?

Love you woman TT, tickled blue? 🤔😁

 

Tickled blue,you can find more reasons to shop than anyone I know.  Congrats on the boy !! Yes,still using the enso and helping.  Love you too, Too Many. MM. 💜💜💜💜

[[De...]]

Good news tt! So happy for you. 🥳

[[Tr...]]

Thank you mmmmm's and DD 💙.. you know me too well mmmmm's I live to shop  :laugh:.. good thing it's not a girl there's tons to buy for girls, not much for boys not like girls. I already have one granddaughter and if I had another coming I'd really break the bank!  :laugh:

TT 💙

[[Ma...]]

Thank you mmmmm's and DD 💙.. you know me too well mmmmm's I live to shop  :laugh:.. good thing it's not a girl there's tons to buy for girls, not much for boys not like girls. I already have one granddaughter and if I had another coming I'd really break the bank!  :laugh:

TT 💙

 

Lol. 

[[De...]]

🤱

[[St...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Twiny oh don't you worry honey the old marvel movies are being watched.l will be ok we have all been there.lt ain't gonna kill me.So l am having a new grand nephew woohoo 🎊🎉.l would have to disagree with you there are beautiful clothes for boys.Get at the shopping.As for your birthday 🍾💐 let's get the partay started.What colour of Zimmer frame do you want?😕 You enjoy your shopping.love you my lST X

Morning Troch that is good news.I hope you start to feel a little better honey.You found a benzo wise doctor?Hang on to him.l hope you have a less painful day.love to you.X

Morning Suzy waves of terror are very common during withdrawal.I have had them the whole way through my taper.Not a lot you can do about them.Just another joyous withdrawal symptom.Stay strong my lovely.love youX

Morning Final always lovely to see you here.Yes we all have to find our own way to get off the benzo.There is no right or wrong.l think stress will always take it's toll l found l aged more when my daughter was ill this is just a little added bonus 😱. Thank God l am not vain or it would be a big deal.love to you.X

Morning Lady Mary can l have nothing 😵😇😋.Oh the joys of withdrawal.You will be grand.l will be with my daughter over the weekend so l will speak to all next week.love you my lady Mary HenX

Morning Olive Janice Meems,Intend Gilly Valley Free Bill Miyu Nova Esperanza GP NJ and everyone here sending you my love.X

[[Tr...]]

Hello everyone,  hope we all may have a better day.

 

Mary, hope you feel a bit better again soon. Tests are covered by insurance overhere. So I don't have to pay for them.

Stut, this was he ortho Dr. Just saw him this once, I think, he had a look at my hip and leg. It is a better day: no anxiety,  no nausea,  no fatigue. Not a lot of pain today, so far, but it's always there. I am getting more and more convinced this pain is chronic and caused by Fibromyalgia. Being on Diazepam doesn't help, obviously.

Have to deal with it somehow.

 

Stay strong everybody.

[[De...]]

Hi Stur,

I am sorry you have the terror too. Omg. It's nothing to sneeze at. holy sh"##. Can't wait for another thriller today in my head.  I hope you dont ever get it again. Dont ever try to figure that crap out in your head. Bad idea. That's what I do. Duh. Feel better. Have a nice day with your daughter. Love you Suzy.

[[St...]]

Hello everyone,  hope we all may have a better day.

 

Mary, hope you feel a bit better again soon. Tests are covered by insurance overhere. So I don't have to pay for them.

Stut, this was he ortho Dr. Just saw him this once, I think, he had a look at my hip and leg. It is a better day: no anxiety,  no nausea,  no fatigue. Not a lot of pain today, so far, but it's always there. I am getting more and more convinced this pain is chronic and caused by Fibromyalgia. Being on Diazepam doesn't help, obviously.

Have to deal with it somehow.

 

Stay strong everybody.

Morning Troch it could be Fibromyalgia only time will tell.Did you have fibromyalgia before you began to withdraw?l really hope you have a smooth day.X