The Long Hold Support Group

[[Tr...]]

Hey intend are you out there? We haven't heard from you are you ok? How's everything going with you and Dan?

TT♥️

[[Tr...]]

As it's bed time here and yesterday we started praying for everyone in this group and Bill joined today with the same spirit, I'm just popping in to ask the universe to help us all.

 

I hope everyone is having a decent afternoon over there. And over here Gilly I hope you're doing a bit better. Good night to you.

 

Mary I hope your pain lets up. It really must be bad as you're not one to complain much. I think the hold will eventually work. My updose made my muscle issues improve some, but it took months to improve, and it's not well, but better. You know Valium how slow it is for everything so if you're holding it could work, but be patient 

 

Suzy I hope today is treating you better than yesterday. Now we're in this together so there's no giving up. Just one day at a time and praying when there's no hope. See you tomorrow.

 

Olive kitty, Guinea pig, final, trishy, guild, Bill, and of course Stut, and anyone else I might be forgetting, I hope you're all finding some peace today and I'm visualizing all out gaba receptors upregulating.

 

NJ strength of you read, I always remember you and Little gma.

 

Love,

Janice

Thank you Janice that was so sweet of you to be thinking and praying for us all. I'm praying too for us at home and in church. Hope you have a restful night.

TT♥️

[[Ol...]]

As it's bed time here and yesterday we started praying for everyone in this group and Bill joined today with the same spirit, I'm just popping in to ask the universe to help us all.

 

I hope everyone is having a decent afternoon over there. And over here Gilly I hope you're doing a bit better. Good night to you.

 

Mary I hope your pain lets up. It really must be bad as you're not one to complain much. I think the hold will eventually work. My updose made my muscle issues improve some, but it took months to improve, and it's not well, but better. You know Valium how slow it is for everything so if you're holding it could work, but be patient 

 

Suzy I hope today is treating you better than yesterday. Now we're in this together so there's no giving up. Just one day at a time and praying when there's no hope. See you tomorrow.

 

Olive kitty, Guinea pig, final, trishy, guild, Bill, and of course Stut, and anyone else I might be forgetting, I hope you're all finding some peace today and I'm visualizing all out gaba receptors upregulating.

 

NJ strength of you read, I always remember you and Little gma.

 

Love,

Janice

 

Thanks so much VMN! Sending a prayer out to the universe for healing for us all. I was thinking of NJ Strength recently actually, she popped into my head for some reason. She used to be pretty active in this group.. does anyone know how she is doing?

 

[[Ol...]]

Hey Mary and Final Healing, sending you guys some extra love. I'm sorry that you had a tough day. 

Maybe tomorrow will be better.... -That's what I would say to my mom when I was saying goodnight to her and I had had a bad day in which I hardly left the couch.. which was about 600 in a row there. Maybe tomorrow will be better. Love you all.

[[In...]]

Hey Intend, hope you are doing some better, thinking of you my friend.  I am really feeling like crap today.  Pain and benzo brain    love you, MM.  💜💜. 🚂🚂. 🌹🌹. 🐈🐾🐾🐾

 

MM,

 

I’ve barely had a moment to look at the LHSG today, but I sure wish you felt better. I feel like crap myself, but I’ve continued to hold because I need to talk on the phone probably next week to finally sign up for a part D plan for Dan  and myself, and I didn’t want my voice to get worse.

 

And Mary and Brad are coming over the weekend. Mary bought fire sticks for Dans birthday on October 30. We weren’t sure how many smart TVs we have so Blake came over and looked at them. Turns out we have 3 smart TVs so now we can  get all this stuff I keep hearing about like nexflix and Apple TV. And HBO that we’ve always had until the dish stopped carrying it.

 

This is truly trivial compared to the way some of us are feeling. I hope we start feeling somewhat better, but hope is what we have.  Dan 🚂 me 🌹 Pepper 🌶 and you 💙💚💛🧡💜

 

I just feel like I need to have some of my favorite oldies but goodies played to make us all feel better, and I know the person to ask. Lightbulb 💡 moment.

 

And good night everyone. Turn off the lights and try to sleep. 💤 😴

 

[[St...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Trish l am baking my ass off here.There will be a lorry load of apple tarts on the way to Bill by the end of the day.He is going nowhere 😘.So you have had an uptick in withdrawal symptoms? Please don't taper again until they have eased off.Let's face it honey a week here and there can make all the difference.Think about it.l hope you have a good day twiny.love you my lST.

Morning Bill glad to hear you are staying somewhat stable as you go.Hopefully slow and steady will keep things level for you.Just remember if you feel an uptick in withdrawal hold as long as you need to.l know you will just a little reminder.love to you.

Morning Feeling, Janice,Lady Mary, Intend, Suzy, GP,Gilly,Free,Gild, Meems, Esperanza and everyone here who are suffering l know this is so difficult sometimes too much to bear however it will pass.l hate saying this over and over again but it is the truth.You are strong women and l know this can be unbearable however it won't beat you.Hang in there my lovely friends.love you all.

[[St...]]

I hope you guys like this, a great quote from FH

 

"Accepting the unacceptable and having the strength to endure it. "

 

That is so many of us in withdrawal.......

Well said Final very apt on this occasion.

  My mother had a saying which she and her family always lived by and she taught us this when we were kids.What can't be cured must be endured.Her generation knew that everything can't be cured and learned to cope with whatever they had to.l think it is a very hard lesson for everyone to learn but a very necessary one.l hope you have a better day honey.Love to you.X

[[Tr...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Trish l am baking my ass off here.There will be a lorry load of apple tarts on the way to Bill by the end of the day.He is going nowhere 😘.So you have had an uptick in withdrawal symptoms? Please don't taper again until they have eased off.Let's face it honey a week here and there can make all the difference.Think about it.l hope you have a good day twiny.love you my lST.

Morning Bill glad to hear you are staying somewhat stable as you go.Hopefully slow and steady will keep things level for you.Just remember if you feel an uptick in withdrawal hold as long as you need to.l know you will just a little reminder.love to you.

Morning Feeling, Janice,Lady Mary, Intend, Suzy, GP,Gilly,Free,Gild, Meems, Esperanza and everyone here who are suffering l know this is so difficult sometimes too much to bear however it will pass.l hate saying this over and over again but it is the truth.You are strong women and l know this can be unbearable however it won't beat you.Hang in there my lovely friends.love you all.

Hey Twin! How are you feeling? Better I pray!! 🙏 I'm actually feeling pretty good. I can feel an ever so slight heaviness in my chest when I walk fast. I honestly think it's probably never gone completely away. It's not stopping me from doing anything. I think if I wasn't so in tune to my body I wouldn't have even noticed it. We'll see what next Thursday brings if I stay as I am now I'll cut that other tiny bit away, if not and sxs arise I'll stay put. Trust me Stut I don't want to ever suffer air hunger again 😱 I have read on BB where other buddies suffer air hunger and pots sxs the entire taper! I can't even imagine going through that all the way to the end of the taper, but some do.. Not this girl! 😳

 

Listen tiny woman you get back to the baking for my Bill, let's keep him by making him fat and happy! 😂😂

 

Love you much! So hope you are feeling better! ♥️♥️♥️

LST

[[Tr...]]

Bill! Good news my twin is making you a boat load of apple tarts! Yummm.. we're not trying to bribe you Bill do please don't think that 🤥😂😂

 

Your everything "apple" friend, 

TT🍎🍏

[[De...]]

Hi everyone,

I dont mean to bust in like this with mty problems.  My head is do confused. I just went to my psych and she was hortible. I told her i was still having pain ans sx. She said its not the benzo. She said i need to go to a med dr and find out what is wrong is wrong and she cant help me. She looked pissed at me. She said ahe has been doing this for a ling time snd never heard anyone say what i am saying before. Then she looked at me and said are you a dr. I trid to explain how i got so distabiled snd she said that was a long time ago and that wouldnt do it. I told her it becsuse my doses were chaned and ctd  and benzo changes. She said thete was no way i could be in interdose wd from the xanax i was on for a year. I told her when i switches from x to v i got the pain ans she says no. That wouldnt happen. She said i drank. That was 4 years ago i stopped. Then she said she would not sign off 9n ssdi. I never asked her toi. She says i need to work with my thersoist. I told her i kmow what ir is and i dont have a med condition. She didnt like that. She doent like anyone disagreeing with her. Now my head is messed up thinking maybe something else is wrong with me. She says it is not possible for me to be in benzo wd. She is keeping my meds the same. I hope she doenst stop pres. Maybe sje hates me and isnt going to pres anymore. I just wanted to work with her on tapering.

[[Fi...]]

DD,

 

Your doctor is wrong. 

 

I had two separate psychiatrists tell me that they had never seen anyone struggle with Lamictal withdrawal and that I had an anxiety disorder.  Meanwhile there are thousands of people struggle with it.

 

Then I had a complex grief counselor tell me that I was profoundly depressed, it wasnt from benzos, to go to detox and also get electro convulsive therapy. 

 

All of the conversations made me doubt myself but deep inside I know it's the meds.  I had to have many conversations with friends I trusted to get grounded again.

 

Many doctors do not want to accept their patients realities because they are defensive and rigid in their beliefs. 

 

I got this blog post from Jennifer Leigh that might be helpful. She cold turkeyed off of 18 years of benzos and survived.

https://wp.me/p7whZN-4vK

[[De...]]

Thanks fh;

I am almost in tears. I started thinking maybe i am crazy. I tremble and shake she says it is not the benxo. She was so.mean to me. I went to the er once  and they told me to get ect. I was so mad. I told the dr you dont even know me. You talk to me for 5 min and tell me to do that. What is wrong with these ppl. I was trying to be nice to her and eork on a taper plan. You can tell she does not like you disagree with her. We alk are suffering so bad and they mess with your head that is why i have been like this so long because noone believed me and i kept trying different meds. I am sorry that happened to you. Its horrible when you feel you know it is the drug and they say no. It really pisses me off. I swear i hate those ppl. Im so depressed now. I hope im not stuck this way. She really started making me feel like this was anxiety. She dismissed the trembling. It has to be the benzo or im.posessed by the devil.

 

 

 

[[Fi...]]

Thanks fh;

I am almost in tears. I started thinking maybe i am crazy. I tremble and shake she says it is not the benxo. She was so.mean to me. I went to the er once  and they told me to get ect. I was so mad. I told the dr you dont even know me. You talk to me for 5 min and tell me to do that. What is wrong with these ppl. I was trying to be nice to her and eork on a taper plan. You can tell she does not like you disagree with her. We alk are suffering so bad and they mess with your head that is why i have been like this so long because noone believed me and i kept trying different meds. I am sorry that happened to you. Its horrible when you feel you know it is the drug and they say no. It really pisses me off. I swear i hate those ppl. Im so depressed now. I hope im not stuck this way. She really started making me feel like this was anxiety. She dismissed the trembling. It has to be the benzo or im.posessed by the devil.

 

I'm so sorry you experienced that. 

 

I cried my eyes out after these doctors badgered me.  I thought I was going crazy. 

 

I was furious but couldn't even get in touch with my anger because I was so vulnerable and shocked by the treatment I received.

 

Take some time for yourself today and be very gentle. You are a good person who is withdrawing from a power medication that causes many people to shake and tremble. 

 

 

[[Tr...]]

Thanks fh;

I am almost in tears. I started thinking maybe i am crazy. I tremble and shake she says it is not the benxo. She was so.mean to me. I went to the er once  and they told me to get ect. I was so mad. I told the dr you dont even know me. You talk to me for 5 min and tell me to do that. What is wrong with these ppl. I was trying to be nice to her and eork on a taper plan. You can tell she does not like you disagree with her. We alk are suffering so bad and they mess with your head that is why i have been like this so long because noone believed me and i kept trying different meds. I am sorry that happened to you. Its horrible when you feel you know it is the drug and they say no. It really pisses me off. I swear i hate those ppl. Im so depressed now. I hope im not stuck this way. She really started making me feel like this was anxiety. She dismissed the trembling. It has to be the benzo or im.posessed by the devil.

Hey Suzy Q you're not crazy and you certainly are not possessed by the devil! I was treated badly by my former Dr. He put me on xanax yrs ago and told me I'd need that drug for the rest of my life. Fast forward 25 yrs and on a routine visit he turns and says you have to get off this drug and I'm going to reduce you by half a milligram every two weeks! I didn't understand why and I didn't know the dangers of withdrawing but I assumed at the time that it wouldn't be a problem so I was blindsided by it but very compliant with his plan for tapering. All I knew about Xanax was not to abruptly stop or a seizure could happen. Well I got the shock of my life when I tried to do it his way. I came home that day and started to taper that night with night time dose. I don't know why but I decided I'd eliminate only .25 and then 2 weeks after that I'd drop another .25 to meet his demand of .5 every two weeks.. well holy mother of God!! I can't even articulate the hell that ensued after that first large cut!! When I called to tell him how sick I was he told me to come in. I did and he has mean and angry to me. I had never seen him like that. I knew then that he had to be in trouble by law or the opioid crisis was freaking him out and I was being punished for it. So I kept trying to meet his demand and cut another .25 a little over two weeks after that. I ended up in the psyche Ward after that next cut. Guess what doc didn't care! He still wanted me to do it his way. He told me I'd feel nervous for about a year but then I'd feel better!! Well that was that I needed a new Dr and fast!! So thankfully my daughter in law was working for GP and he took me as his patient. He felt sorry for me. He did expect me to still taper and I was fine with that but I had to control the taper. So far knock wood he has let me do that. Actually as of right now according to him I'm no longer tapering just maintaining and he's ok with that too. My advice to you is GET A NEW DR as fast as you can!! Before my daughter in law jumped in I had a list of Drs and I called everywhere. I had a psychiatrist who was going to take me but my daughter in law had just gotten me in with the Dr she worked for. I know it sounds daunting to have to look for another Dr when you feel this bad but you need a Dr who believes you and is willing to help you not punish you for how you are feeling by not believing you. I would search and interview other Drs if I were you and hold onto her until you do. I'm so sorry you went through that today. 

TT♥️

[[De...]]

Thanks TT,

That badtard! I cant believe he did that to you. Some of these drs are truly evil. I am sorry you went through that.  I had a similar experience whem this whole hell started. I just couldnt.believe what she said. I also told her if i wean i cant just cut the pill in half. She sais she knows how to wran me off. Bullshit! The last time i saw her she said when tour ready we will cut your pill in half. I have reslly suffered and she treats me like its minor aches and pains. And the shaking is just reg anxiety. I hate psych. I have to find a new one i.might take her out. This is going to be hard bwvause i have to make sure they pres. And wont cut me off. Rhanks tt i am so glad you have a new dr. Mine is si mean is so mean she probably flagged me in het notes. She just said we will leave it as the 1 mg love dd

[[Tr...]]

Thanks TT,

That badtard! I cant believe he did that to you. Some of these drs are truly evil. I am sorry you went through that.  I had a similar experience whem this whole hell started. I just couldnt.believe what she said. I also told her if i wean i cant just cut the pill in half. She sais she knows how to wran me off. Bullshit! The last time i saw her she said when tour ready we will cut your pill in half. I have reslly suffered and she treats me like its minor aches and pains. And the shaking is just reg anxiety. I hate psych. I have to find a new one i.might take her out. This is going to be hard bwvause i have to make sure they pres. And wont cut me off. Rhanks tt i am so glad you have a new dr. Mine is si mean is so mean she probably flagged me in het notes. She just said we will leave it as the 1 mg love dd

Any time Suzy Q!

If she will allow you to remain on the 1 mg just taper behind her back and store up pills. I have a stash. Even the Dr I have now knows nothing of my current taper. As far as he knows I'm still on 1. 25 mgs and I'm leaving it like that so I can store up more pills. I have PTSD from what former Dr did to me and I never want that to happen again so I stash pills. Hopefully if the day ever comes when I'm completely off this med I will flush my stash down the toilet but for right now it's like buying insurance. At least I know if God forbid I was ever put in that kind of situation again I will have medication to fall back on until I found another Dr. Sad way to live but this is how it is. But if this bitchy Dr of yours is willing to hold you at 1 mg stay there forever and taper when you can behind her back. Sad it has to be this way but I have 0 trust in Drs ever since that happened to me. My gyno knows my story and he said it was GUILT that my former Dr felt and that's why he lashed out at me in anger when I couldn't meet his demand. Just make sure you don't add any new drugs. Try to get as stable as possible and taper when you're up to it just don't tell the doc that you are.

TT♥️

[[Gu...]]

DD, you poor thing.  Your doctor is a witch!  When I first told my pdoc I needed to taper, he said if I had a problem I needed to go to rehab. I started tapering on my own. Now he acts like he’s taking credit for it.  I don’t think you can be honest with her. Just keep tapering, hoard pills and just smile at her stupidity.

 

I was watching the Jordan Peterson interviews and I’d bet he can now straighten out a lot of pdocs.

 

Chin up sweetie, it’s not you

 

Trishy is so right.

[[Tr...]]

Hey sweet Mary! Thinking of you today girlfriend hoping you're feeling better. Join us when you're able. You're always missed here.

Lots of love and big hugs my friend  :hug:

TT♥️

[[es...]]

Hey DD, adding my two cents. I think we all get that sort of response from our doctors. Mine wanted me to try ECT and Abilify when I mentioned how dizzy I had become during the taper. The cure for dizziness is apparently to fry your brain. Dump that guy. Espy

[[Gu...]]

ECT, yeah, here this might work.......

[[fr...]]

  It’s a shame we have to lie to our drs. but this is how it is.  Mine wanted me to cut 5 mg of v off 15 mg dose,  I told her I couldn’t.  She let me go down 1 mg and don’t have to see her for 6 months.  I taper on my own now, don’t say anything.  I was already down to 11 mg but glad I didn’t say anything.  She said they are probably going to not let gps prescribe Benzos soon.  Ugh, always something to worry about.  Love to you all. 💕❤️💕❤️💕🙏🏼🙏🏼❤️❤️

[[Fi...]]

I hoard my pills too even though my doctor is giving me the space to taper.

 

I now have about a month stashed and will add on from there. 

 

We have to take care of ourselves. 

 

 

[[va...]]

  It’s a shame we have to lie to our drs. but this is how it is.  Mine wanted me to cut 5 mg of v off 15 mg dose,  I told her I couldn’t.  She let me go down 1 mg and don’t have to see her for 6 months.  I taper on my own now, don’t say anything.  I was already down to 11 mg but glad I didn’t say anything.  She said they are probably going to not let gps prescribe Benzos soon.  Ugh, always something to worry about.  Love to you all. 💕❤️💕❤️💕🙏🏼🙏🏼❤️❤️

 

And this is probably the result of that CNN show. I felt that could happen. I hope no one in Spain sees it.

[[Tr...]]

  It’s a shame we have to lie to our drs. but this is how it is.  Mine wanted me to cut 5 mg of v off 15 mg dose,  I told her I couldn’t.  She let me go down 1 mg and don’t have to see her for 6 months.  I taper on my own now, don’t say anything.  I was already down to 11 mg but glad I didn’t say anything.  She said they are probably going to not let gps prescribe Benzos soon.  Ugh, always something to worry about.  Love to you all. 💕❤️💕❤️💕🙏🏼🙏🏼❤️❤️

 

And this is probably the result of that CNN show. I felt that could happen. I hope no one in Spain sees it.

Not let gp's prescribe?? In Spain or internationally? I just saw my gyno and we talked about benzos and he didn't say anything like that. He said he had patient's that he put on them. I think he would have told me that if that were so

[[Tr...]]

I hoard my pills too even though my doctor is giving me the space to taper.

 

I now have about a month stashed and will add on from there. 

 

We have to take care of ourselves.

Yup I think just about everyone here at BB has a stash. We have to hoard unfortunately. 😔