Ladies, can we talk about menopause?

[[Cr...]]

Ok, my wife is in the throes of menopause and she's been certifiable for months now. I think she's also having midlife crisis, but it's hard to separate the various demons running around our house. I get it. It's hormonal and I'm ok with that. I can ignore the crazed meanness of it all, because when I married her 22 years ago, I expected to spend the rest of my life with her, through thick and thin. And I don't take things too personally.

 

But what I want to know is this. When you pop out the other side of menopause, and those psychotic aliens go back to their mother ship, is there happiness again for you ladies? Because, look, I can wait however many years it takes as long as I know she'll be happy again.

[[Di...]]

You might find the Menopause Support thread interesting reading. The link is below in my signature.

 

Us ladies have a LOT to contend with during these years and it's no fun at all, so patience and a lot of love and understanding is definitely needed. To give you an idea of what menopause can be like - you know about all the horrible benzo withdrawal symptoms you can get? That's exactly what can happen in menopause. So imagine what it can be like if you have to go through a benzo withdrawal at the same time as being menopausal. That's what happened to me.

 

She may also have a serious lack of a sense of humour about anything she is going through, so never make light of any of it - unless she makes the jokes herself. I never realised just how offensive menopause jokes are until I actually experienced it for myself. It would be like making fun of, or joking about, a BB member's withdrawal symptoms.

 

It's also unclear at what point she will "pop out the other side". For some women menopause is almost a non-event. For other women they can suffer for 20 years.

 

 

[[ga...]]

There's hope. Many woman say they actually like it better post-menopause than pre-menopause. Your wife could be one of them. And, as Pam said, some for some women the transition is so gradual and smooth they hardly notice it. Sorry it's not that way for your wife. Sounds like her hormones are not going to let go without a fight.

 

It's wonderful that you are wise enough not to take what she's going through personally, and you are wonderful to be sticking to your promises through thick and thin. Your support is a big help to her whether she realizes it or not right now.

 

Could you go out and teach classes on this? 

[[be...]]

I for one, didn't even notice I had peri and menopause at all. But last night I watched a 2-hours special on PBS and I will never make light of it again. These women have been going through so much pain that it made me cry. Also, they talked a lot about HRT. They said just because you get lucky and don't have any symptoms doesn't mean you don't need HRT. I'm going to call my GYN this week. Tho neither did my mom and both grandmothers have any trouble with it either. And both grand mom's died near 100 years old and mom is still alive and kicking. But that documentary last night was a real eye opener. I'm sorry you missed it. It would have told you everything and more. I was quite shocked, actually. My eyes were glued to the TV. Maybe it will run again. PBS does this.

Bets

[Guest [jc...]]

I had horrible menopausal symptoms which were alleviated 100% when I started HRT.  My mother, on the other hand, never had a single symptom.  However, she developed osteoporosis and has broken her hip a couple times.  She is like the incredible shrinking woman, she used to be my height (5'5") and she's at least 5 inches shorter and bent over with a curved spine.  Taking HRT would have prevented all that.

[[Ch...]]

I had horrible menopausal symptoms which were alleviated 100% when I started HRT.  My mother, on the other hand, never had a single symptom.  However, she developed osteoporosis and has broken her hip a couple times.  She is like the incredible shrinking woman, she used to be my height (5'5") and she's at least 5 inches shorter and bent over with a curved spine.  Taking HRT would have prevented all that.

 

I took HRT (cong estrogens and progesterone).

 

I was about 5'4" when I went through menopause and am now 4'11".

 

I have very pronounced hyperkyphosis and advanced osteoporosis.

 

HRT is not all it's cracked up to be. Just my opinion.

[Guest [jc...]]

Has it helped you at all?  I couldn't do without it, as I was having extreme hot flashes with profuse sweating on my face to the point where I couldn't go out in public.

[[Ch...]]

Has it helped you at all?  I couldn't do without it, as I was having extreme hot flashes with profuse sweating on my face to the point where I couldn't go out in public.

 

I remember my GP said "you'll feel like a new woman" and he was right, initially I did!

 

I didn't get a lot of daytime hot flashes but I had them at night time with profuse sweating. The HRT damped that right down.

 

My most unbearable symptom was the inability to concentrate and forgetfulness. It seemed to improve with the addition of the hormones.

 

But then I started getting migraine aura which I'd never had before and I became concerned about my increased risk of heart attack and stroke as I have a family history of it.

 

There were the ethical considerations as well but I won't get into that.

 

 

[Guest [jc...]]

Did you try any other meds for the osteoporosis? I remember my mother was prescribed Fosamax but she wouldn't take it.

[[Ch...]]

Did you try any other meds for the osteoporosis? I remember my mother was prescribed Fosamax but she wouldn't take it.

 

I have didrocal but my endocrinologist feels that it won't do anything for my osteo; he recommends fosamax but I'm scared to take it.

 

I'm sorry about your mom and hope she'll be okay. Does she manage okay on her own?

 

I don't blame you for seeking relief from the hot flashes.

 

My night sweats were intensely uncomfortable and it's kind of weird 'cause I went through meno 20 years ago and after the initial year or so of symptoms haven't had any to speak of, yet now I've started to get a return of occasional night sweats and hot flashes.

 

Thanks JC.

 

Chinook

[Guest [jc...]]

I hope your meno symptoms will stay on the mild side, they can be pretty bad.  My mom is 90 and  pretty much confined to a wheel chair, but she does ok living at home with help.