A Moment Of Laughter

[[Le...]]

The Journey to Wellness is frought with pain & suffering. For us as well as our loved ones.Today in the midst of a never-ending wave, I heard my Mom laugh:

 

I'm exhausted. The heavy chains of Valium are wrapped tightly around me. They are winning. I cannot move, I cannot get out of bed.

 

Mom's home; her breathing's labored as she hauls groceries up the  stairs. I'm filled with guilt. At least I can help put things away...then back to bed I'll go.

 

Groceries are put away. I'm staggering back to bed. Wait, the trash in the bathroom needs emptying. Surely I can do this simple task.

 

My muscles are knotted in spasm. I gingerly bend forward and grab the trashcan. Success! I've got it.  I turn around and...splash

 

No, no I don't got it! My benzo fingers have defied my will. The damn trashcan is sitting upright, perfectly centered in the toilet. "Nothing but net" I think to myself as I stare at the odd sight.

 

My brain goes blank, my body won't move. WTF am I gonna do??!! Tears of frustration and anger run down my face. I curse starting blankly at the mess I've created, dumbfounded. What's wrong Mom asks as she walks up behind me.

 

Then I hear it. Laughter. Mom's laughing. Today, for a moment, I heard my Mom laugh and that's a good thing. 

[[4G...]]

And I hope you will be laughing soon. Gilly x

[[Le...]]

Thanks Gilly, I did laugh at myself when I was writing this. And although the wave is rough, I've been through much worse

 

LB 

[[4G...]]

Good Luck! You're not on your own, honey!   

[[Le...]]

You got that right!  Actually I'm quite blessed. Thanks Gilly

[[4G...]]

No worries, pal! 

[[Le...]]

BTW, I love your avatars.

 

Sending good thoughts and prayers for healing your way. 

[[4G...]]

Thank you!  A few Buddies have liked my avatars now! But they are such a drag to research.....NOT!!! 

[[Le...]]

LOL

[[be...]]

Hi Left, I was touched by your thread, and I also at times need to laugh, it seems to take away those cobwebs and bad thoughts. Well go to the

 

Progress Log, and check out Benzogirl log honestly I can not keep a straight face when she talks about what her and her brothers got into while

 

young, she bares her funny side, and I find myself going there each day to see what the kids have done now. I actually had belly laughs. One thing to

 

keep in mind that you said, I am" blessed," and you are, because you have opened your heart and there are so many here that will help and you are

 

going to be OK, it will get better, for sure. 

 

                      Gilly, I look everyday for the new pic of the day, for this old lady it makes me feel like a wanna be cougar!!!!!!!!! 

[[Le...]]

Begood, thanks for reading my thread.

 

Ironically, this was my first attempt at some  levity. The written words didn't exactly come across as I intended. I'm sure in time I'll improve at expressing myself.

 

I will check out  Benzogirl's Progress Log. Laughter is a much needed commodity these days.

 

Thanks for the words of encouragement. Since I found BB I don't feel so alone all the time.

 

Gilly, I agree with begood, love the eye-candy avatars.

[[be...]]

You did fine, keep on writing, I find that it helps me to write down how I am feeling, because it cleanses the soul and we have a lot of hidden company

 

here, that can not start a thread. Have you started writing your progress yet on the progress log?. Just to let you know I like reading what you post for

 

others, keep it up. 

 

[[Le...]]

Yes, writing is definitely cathartic.

 

My progress log must wait.  I need new RX glasses and something other than this tiny phone to post from. I'm going blind as a bat with double vision boot! But yes a progress log is in order.

 

Lord knows we all need support and validation on this roller coaster. Hoping I can be more supportive of others in the future. 

[[4G...]]

Yes, LB, it was well written. That's why I replied! x

[[Le...]]

Thanks redevan for checking out thread! 

Will try to provide more...