My preception

[[Do...]]

After years of suffering from a problem that has no sense to it.mental pain after mental pain.

My perception about this world changed.

Ironically I think this suffering showed me the truth about this world we live in.

 

I now see the world as it is, without all the decorations, without all the illusions that humanity had been blinded by(or created it self).

 

It's all about luck. it makes no different if you are a good person or a bad person..there isn't a higher power that looks upon us and rewards us for being good.

It's an illusion.

 

This is a fact and I know this from my own personal experience.

I'v been one of those justice seeking people, standing up for people that get teased(I used to read emotions pretty weel)I had a lot of empathy towards all living creatures. I used to save animals outside as much as I could... treating sick or in need cats,birds,dogs.

If I was hearing an animal voice in need I couldn't pass by,no matter what animal it is.I couldn't hurt a fly.

 

I used to be kind with people.I loved teaching and making everyone feel good.

 

And yet I have been through more traumas then you can comprehend. why? NO REASON.

 

I thought it was a test,a lesson,i tried to see a meaning in this suffering..that god was trying to teach me something.

Nope..I was wrong..SO wrong..

 

So many bad people around the world..just watch videos on liveleak(you will never be the same after watching them),on the news..everywhere.

 

And yet from all these people, me..? a guy that just wanted nothing but to make everyone happy and contribute this world through he's talents(undeveloped fully because of these problem btw).

 

It's just luck.

 

Just like one person is born autistic,or another has  Sudden Infant Death,or another gets drived over by a car.

It's all luck with little free will so it seems.(and if you really think about..maybe there isn't a free will at all).

 

I know im being a downer here.

 

But I just had to get this out of my system.

[[hu...]]

It's all about luck. it makes no different if you are a good person or a bad person..there isn't a higher power that looks upon us and rewards us for being good.

It's an illusion.

 

I've thought about this too, and I agree, it all seems random, and it all eventually boils down to the basic principle of survival of the fittest. One has to be physically, mentally, socially fit (as in having a strong social support system) to survive the obstacles. From a large perspective, if you take a look from thousands of feet above ground, the things you see happening to people seems random and chaotic with no purpose or ultimate goal.

 

I also believe in the cycle of karma at the same time, if you do good to someone it does pay off at some time directly or indirectly, sooner or later. If I am feeling hurt I probably must have hurt somebody in the past, and paying for it now, to understand what it means to be hurt, to learn from it and not repeat the same behaviour and act differently next time the same situation arises.

 

It's just another philosophy created by humans to keep things in order or to understand the things that happen and make it look meaningful, but in the end instinct wins I guess.

 

[[Ro...]]

I grok you. And yes I agree.

 

Luck, sheer chance, karma, whatever you wish to call it.

 

And we are the ones who managed to survive.  A man can make 200 million sperm cells a day and yet it takes only one to make it. 

 

But keep in mind:

 

After a major storm on the ocean beach, one dude went out for a walk to see what flotsam and jetsam he could find.  Most of what he found were oodles of Sand Dollars well beyond the area of their making it back into the surf on their own.  Further along the beach he encountered another dude who was busy picking  up dozens of still green sand dollars and tossing them back into the surf.

 

To which he sneered:"How on Earth do you think you're doing any Good?"  "What you're doing on this one isolated stretch of beach means nothing in the whole ocean, and in the grand scheme of things!"

 

"You are correct about that!" said the sand dollar pitcher.

"But why do you not stop doing it? It's a waste of energy!"

"It's hardly a waste of energy."

"How do you figure that?"

"Because my actions now, to this sand dollar here."and he held up one.

"Means Everything." And he continued to toss more sand dollars back into the surf...

[Guest [ba...]]

The way that I see it - there are a lot of things that we do that seem pretty random (no control, dependent on 'luck').  When the ball takes a bad bounce, or the car tire is flat we say it's due to bad luck (I think that we rarely credit good luck for the things that do work out).

 

Then there are things that we deliberately/intentionally do (e.g. loving, caring, personal improvement) where we control the outcome much more than the fates.  Benzo withdrawal is both.  The fates may control your symptoms to a large part, but you and your dedication control your plan/actions.

 

This is the classic 'grant me the wisdom to know the difference' scenario.

[[...]]

Dorian ,

i red your post...

been there, done that...

its all part of our journey...

with time it will get better...

i promise...

 

here is a very good book,

to understand why you feel like this

https://archive.org/stream/herowithin002330mbp/herowithin002330mbp_djvu.txt

 

i think I'm already at the magicians stage,,,final one from 6...

 

p.s. i don't know if its okey to put here this link,,,

if not then moderators please remove it.

[[...]]

After years of suffering from a problem that has no sense to it.mental pain after mental pain.

My perception about this world changed.

Ironically I think this suffering showed me the truth about this world we live in.

 

I now see the world as it is, without all the decoratio, without all the illusions that humanity had been blinded by(or created it self).

 

It's all about luck. it makes no different if you are a good person or a bad person..there isn't a higher power that looks upon us and rewards us for being good.

It's an illusion.

 

This is a fact and I know this from my own personal experience.

I'v been one of those justice seeking people, standing up for people that get teased(I used to read emotions pretty weel)I had a lot of empathy towards all living creatures. I used to save animals outside as much as I could... treating sick or in need cats,birds,dogs.

If I was hearing an animal voice in need I couldn't pass by,no matter what animal it is.I couldn't hurt a fly.

 

I used to be kind with people.I loved teaching and making everyone feel good.

 

And yet I have been through more traumas then you can comprehend. why? NO REASON.

 

I thought it was a test,a lesson,i tried to see a meaning in this suffering..that god was trying to teach me something.

Nope..I was wrong..SO wrong..

 

So many bad people around the world..just watch videos on liveleak(you will never be the same after watching them),on the news..everywhere.

 

And yet from all these people, me..? a guy that just wanted nothing but to make everyone happy and contribute this world through he's talents(undeveloped fully because of these problem btw).

 

It's just luck.

 

Just like one person is born autistic,or another has  Sudden Infant Death,or another gets drived over by a car.

It's all luck with little free will so it seems.(and if you really think about..maybe there isn't a free will at all).

 

I know im being a downer here.

 

But I just had to get this out of my system.

 

 

Hey Dorian,

tell us more about it...

make us feel good...

 

eva

[[...]]

yeah, i red your pm....

 

 

[[Do...]]

What the hell is wrong with you ESTHERSMOM?