Sexual activity

[[ma...]]

She knows that I've been going through benzo withdrawal and she knows that I've had a tough year with all these symptoms, however I haven't told her or anyone except a close friend that it's causing problems with my sex life. I guess I could go for it and if it didn't work out then try and explain... but even that's making me worried now Urghh!

[[...]]

I'm worried about not being able to maintain an erection, I have no problem getting one but if I'm anxious I notice my mind's not focused, I'll loose it pretty quickly and I think it might hurt her feelings if that happened... There's nothing wrong with my libido though as I really want to have sex with her. A friend of mine suggested a cock ring to help maintain it, anyone have experience with these? I might see the doctor and see what she says - I don't know whether Viagra would be a good idea or not to tide me over until I'm more healed.

 

It's really sad that just a couple of years ago I had no problems going 4-5 times a night with a girl but benzos have completely taken that away from me

 

well good for you, i never heard that its even possible so many times.... :idiot:

 

i think once it  was 2 times for my husband...... :laugh:

 

[[ma...]]

It definitely is possible and that's what makes it all the more harder for me, going from 4-5 times a night to nil is taking it's toll on my self-esteem :/

[[...]]

It definitely is possible and that's what makes it all the more harder for me, going from 4-5 times a night to nil is taking it's toll on my self-esteem :/

 

well, i don't think that self esteem should be based on someones x performance....

 

[[ma...]]

To me anyway the ability to satisfy a girl is very important and if I can't do that it lowers my self worth and I'm not going to do that if I can only stay hard for 5-10 minutes :/

[[...]]

To me anyway the ability to satisfy a girl is very important and if I can't do that it lowers my self worth and I'm not going to do that if I can only stay hard for 5-10 minutes :/

 

Well, I'm very happy for that girl...

 

I'm not going to go into details with my private life, because I feel like I missed on some things,,,,

 

But oh well, you can't always get what you want, but you will GET WHAT YOU NEED!!!!!!

[[ma...]]

I think I'm just going to go for it, I've been doing some research on cock rings and they apparently help maintain the erection, so if I use one of them I might be able to go for 20-30 mins and that should be enough I just hope it sorts itself out soon as I'm fed up of being afraid of sex I'll give it to month 14 post c/t before I go to the docs and see if there is anything they can do...

[[pr...]]

by the way, going for really long sessions with a woman is not always a healthy thing for her. a woman really only needs about 20 -30 minutes and otherwise it can feel intrusive. so just keep that in mind. i mean, unless she's on opiates and can go for hours like i use to be able to

 

not anymore.

[[hu...]]

To me anyway the ability to satisfy a girl is very important and if I can't do that it lowers my self worth and I'm not going to do that if I can only stay hard for 5-10 minutes :/

 

I can hardly get hard, staying hard is even harder...having a hard and embarrassing time with these symptoms 

[[Te...]]

I'm wondering...

Is the erectile dysfunction I assume you are referring to actually an emotional dysfunction resulting in erectile failure? Physically, are lot of our manifestations simply mental responses to gaba signals? I'm never clear in my own mindless mind just WHAT is real in terms of function and what is misinterpretation of what seems to be real. I realize that the erection doesn't exist without a mental kicker, but is there, in fact, a physical reason for reluctant tumescence? Is it related directly to benzo w/d or is it a byproduct of the stressors. And does it really matter?

I would guess that the hyper acuity of sensory input might create its own fight or flight response, so that the sexual experience is either otherworldly in pleasure or a form of mental torture. Kinda like an ice bucket challenge without getting wet...

  Do women have a similar physiological conflict?

Lastly, are viagra and cialis safe drugs to introduce into a w/d scenario?

Just wondering...

[[Fl...]]

seduce my mind and you can have my body

:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

 

YOU WOULD THINK THEY WOULD HAVE FIGURED THIS OUT BY NOW...WOULDN'T YOU.

 

FB

 

[[Te...]]

seduce my mind and you can have my body

:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

 

YOU WOULD THINK THEY WOULD HAVE FIGURED THIS OUT BY NOW...WOULDN'T YOU.

 

FB

SOME OF US ARE INCORRUPTIBLY IGNORANT...I BE ONE :'( i'm getting good advice, but using it is awful hard...)T-M

[[Cl...]]

I'm wondering...

Is the erectile dysfunction I assume you are referring to actually an emotional dysfunction resulting in erectile failure? Physically, are lot of our manifestations simply mental responses to gaba signals? I'm never clear in my own mindless mind just WHAT is real in terms of function and what is misinterpretation of what seems to be real. I realize that the erection doesn't exist without a mental kicker, but is there, in fact, a physical reason for reluctant tumescence? Is it related directly to benzo w/d or is it a byproduct of the stressors. And does it really matter?

I would guess that the hyper acuity of sensory input might create its own fight or flight response, so that the sexual experience is either otherworldly in pleasure or a form of mental torture. Kinda like an ice bucket challenge without getting wet...

  Do women have a similar physiological conflict?

Lastly, are viagra and cialis safe drugs to introduce into a w/d scenario?

Just wondering...

 

I don't think so. If someone has intense anxiety then definitely, that can prevent an erection but I have ED sometimes too and it's purely physical. Before benzos I was an extremely healthy 27 year old and had no problems there but it shut off immediately with w/d. There are plenty of nights when I feel totally fine anxiety and stress wise but that doesn't change how I can perform physically. In the very rare occasion that I have any sort of sexual activity with a girl I just make sure she's knows before hand not to expect much unfortunately 

[[ma...]]

You sound like you're in a similar position to me Clark, you want to have sex but benzo withdrawal is physically preventing you from performing. You are also nearly the same age as me and like me you were fine sexually before benzos. I'm wondering if considering viagra is a good idea, I mean why suffer the angst of not being able to perform for no reason - we seem to be in this limbo period, our benzo withdrawal symptoms are low enough to be intimate with a woman but we are obviously not healed as we are having performance problems, so I think viagra would be a good solution to tide me over until I'm healed...

[[Ro...]]

Currently holding until I find a doc who has a better sense of how to taper.

 

I get the occasional 'window' in which activity is a possibility. Luckily I also have a very patient wife.

 

Even with both, I haven't had much 'release'.

[[Cl...]]

You sound like you're in a similar position to me Clark, you want to have sex but benzo withdrawal is physically preventing you from performing. You are also nearly the same age as me and like me you were fine sexually before benzos. I'm wondering if considering viagra is a good idea, I mean why suffer the angst of not being able to perform for no reason - we seem to be in this limbo period, our benzo withdrawal symptoms are low enough to be intimate with a woman but we are obviously not healed as we are having performance problems, so I think viagra would be a good solution to tide me over until I'm healed...

 

I've considered taking arginine which may be a little more mellow than viagra just to try but I'm nervous to. I have so many paradoxical reactions to things these days I don't know what could happen. Another wave of week long panic isn't something I want to test out, u know?

[[ba...]]

i quit xanax 3 1/2 months ago ,

 

my labido and desire  was still strong during days of my worst withdrawals umm i seem to enjoy sex alot more now though with no withdrawals or tinnittus bothering me

[[...]]

first time i had a X was on my wedding night when i was 25....

now its been one year and a half 0 action.....

 

thank you MF doctors and big pharma!!!!

[[Te...]]

Welcome back EM!

  There's a thread about woman difficulties floating around here somewhere...kinda current...it has helped me kinda understand the other side of this twisted coin...mike

[[...]]

Welcome back EM!

  There's a thread about woman difficulties floating around here somewhere...kinda current...it has helped me kinda understand the other side of this twisted coin...mike

 

 

im not aware of one, but i will pm you with some articles that will open your eyes on women fantasies on X...

 

[[Te...]]

Welcome back EM!

  There's a thread about woman difficulties floating around here somewhere...kinda current...it has helped me kinda understand the other side of this twisted coin...mike

 

 

im not aware of one, but i will pm you with some articles that will open your eyes on women fantasies on X...

 

 

It's not my eyes I'm worried about... 

[[...]]

Welcome back EM!

  There's a thread about woman difficulties floating around here somewhere...kinda current...it has helped me kinda understand the other side of this twisted coin...mike

 

 

im not aware of one, but i will pm you with some articles that will open your eyes on women fantasies on X...

 

 

It's not my eyes I'm worried about... 

 

oh you poor thing 

 

http://www.yourtango.com/200913645/male-sexuality-explained#.VKcNB8YUsg5

 

p.s. i think moderators will deactivate this link because of some publicity ads on that website.....

 

 

[[pr...]]

Welcome back EM!

  There's a thread about woman difficulties floating around here somewhere...kinda current...it has helped me kinda understand the other side of this twisted coin...mike

 

mike,

 

which thread are you speaking of? how has it helped you understand things?

 

pretty

[[Te...]]

EM and Pretty...found it! It had been moved. Is now under OFF TOPIC

Who's ready to talk frankly about...

It helps me to understand that guys aren't the only one with expressive plumbing problems...

I have had both sides of both coins...mine has been 'yep yep wanna' to 'nope nope don't think this is gonna work'...hers was 'nope nope' to 'nope I might nope'.  Since we had already agreed to nope early on, it was kinda a non issue, but the chemistry was sometimes there when the time wasn't...I, with my ego, promptly assumed it must be ME...

The ability to discuss things openly on the forums is such a great tool...

[[ba...]]

i didnt exercise last night , maybe that was the reason why i had tinnittus during sexual activity this morning