The Adventures of ...BENZOMAN!

[[Ar...]]

Continue the story by ad libing your own lines.

No rules, just have fun with it. I'll start us off:

 

The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel...

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BENZOMAN looks out the window, spitting the metallic taste on the cold oak floor....

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TexasFlutter comes into the room and asks Benzoman....WTH super hero...I just cleaned these floors....why didn't you just spit in the sink?  Now, take this mop and Lysol and clean that spit up!!!!!

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Benzoman said, "I will not clean floors! I am a famous superhero!" Benzo man then running out the door and going to Starbucks...

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He leans into the bar as he reads the Metropolitan Chronical. Sipping the halfcaf non fat frape latte, he realizes he must do something about this story. The paper reads...

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Flyman Causing a Buss...SWAT needed...

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"WAIT...dont...go.." said a voice echoing over my shoulder. I turned, it was SSRI dude.  "Your not going to have all the fun by yourself are you?" Said SSRI dude. They...

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They headed out the door.  SSRI Dude was actually trying to lead Benzoman a stray.  He failed to mention to Benzoman...if you hang with me long enough I will rock your world!

You won't know if your coming or going...things will stop making sense, you won't function at full capacity.

Benzoman was thrown for a loop...SSRI Dude is like kryptonite to Superman. Benzoman felt his powers fading....what to do next?

[[...]]

Benzocaine passed out! When he woke up he found himself in SSRI Dudes lair. SSRI Dude welcomed him to his special place, he called it relaxation cave...

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The cave had rainbows and candy canes coming from the walls. All a sudden a pink unicorn Pegasus walked in... "Are you ok b-man?" The Unicorn said, laughing...

[Guest [Mi...]]

Benzoman, his blood sugar in crisis, started eating the rainbows and candy canes. OH NO!!! It was laced with benzos by the SSRI Dude!

 

Benzoman has to reinstate his benzo and start the taper all over!!! And then . . .

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TexasFluter comes storming through the door with her Aloe Vera antidote....Here Benzoman, drink this and it will block all benzo's from re-entering your system. YOU WILL NOT HAVE TO START THIS NIGHTMARE OVER AGAIN.

Benzoman is regaining his strength. Crisis diverted! And then....

[Guest [Mi...]]

The pink Unicorn Pegasus comes charging in! Confused! Turn right. Darn it! The spiraling unicorn horn is really a laser. Pegasus lowers his head, aiming the laser at Benzoman. TexasFluter leaps up on the candy canes on the walls. The Aloe Vera antidote turns into Seroquel and she. . .

 

She...medicates the Unicorn!!!!!!!

 

Oh, no! And then Pegasus. . .

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SSRI dude smiled through a crooked grin, "You underestimate me, I put some Zoloft dust on the candy canes too !" Bman gulped and started to lose touch with sanity...

[Guest [Mi...]]

Bman started to depersonalize and wait, his depersonalization was a magical power!!!!

 

If he closed his eyes and tried really, really hard, he could see into the next. . .three seconds.

 

Not much of a magical power, hey? But wait, anything can happen in a benzo second. We're talking, yes, that's right, benzo time includes time travel!!Woot woot!

 

Okay, my pretty BB's. We're time traveling.

 

So, Benzoman goes back in time to before SSRI dude was born. And he marries his mother!!!!

 

Oh, no!

 

So, now SSRI dude is born and he's part benzo and part SSRI and he also has magical powers because he can. . . .

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SSRI dude, I AM YOUR FATHER... Said BENZOMAN. Daddy?!....

[Guest [Mi...]]

"Daddy" turned around, his dark cape dragging on the marble floor of the castle.

 

And he handed SSRI a magic potion - the cure to benzo belly. SSRI dude was going to make a fortune!

 

First, he had to go through the proper procedure with the FDA - he paid them a lot of money to rig the drug trials and only disclosed the good effects (not the side effects).

 

And then after the stock market approved the medication, he decided to keep the potion all for himself.

 

Until, that is. . . the pink Unicorn Pegasus arrived. . . .insert music for dramatic effect here

 

And Pegasus said. . . .

[[Fl...]]

Holy Cow....TexasFluter is at a total loss for words as her benzo brain can not comprehend this time travel, time warp, time lapse, mind bend.  She fears she may need to nibble on a candy cane, but suddenly remembers they are loaded with Zoloft.

TexasFluter being the med-a-phob she is...resists.  Than she remembers she has her lasso. She wrangles Pegasus as the Seroquel is wearing off....they ride over and scoop up Bensoman and head....   

[Guest [Mi...]]

Pegasus, Bensonman and TexasFluter head over to the alien space craft where they head to a planet far, far away where a mad scientist is hard at work.

 

The mad scientist is a troll named Unpleasant Side Effects who speaks with a sneeze and no one really knows what the heck he's saying. So a lot of potions are kind of messed up.

 

This explains the potion he invented to. . . .

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SUCK THE GABA OUTTA UR BRAIN... to sell Klonopin and xanax to all the good little boys and girls! ( sinister laugh..cough cough..more sinister laughing) Dr. Troll was using the Benzo League as GUINEA PIGS.... then, evil mini trolls leap from the bushes to capture them and administer the horrible potion...

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The troll "Unpleasant Side Effects" has an Achilles heel...which will prove to be his down fall...obviously he is suffering from allergies due to all the toxins he has continued to inhale while making his poisonous concoction!

 

TexasFluter, Benzoman, and MindSeeker have found a way to use massive amount of antihistamine's which Pegasus can now spray through his laser like horn. "Unpleasant Side Effects" and mini trolls don't stand a chance.  Once knocked out by histamine's....the B*man trio will swipe the ingredients to the secret potion.

Benzoman will not let  the EVIL/Sneezing "Unpleasant Side Effects" Troll bring harm to any boys or girl.  He will.....   

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administer 100mg of Benadryl and push the Troll "Unpleasant Side Effects", into dreamland. With the troll ("Unpleasant Side Effects") in dreamland Bman and the heros loaded up into the spaceship and tuned the radio to BenzoFM. the could finally return to.....

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With the "AWESOME" tunes of BenzoFM blaring....making there trip Back to BB's exhilarating...as the trio knew they held in their hot little hands the secret to helping all here....

[Guest [Mi...]]

And help all they would!

 

Unfortunately, the troll "Unpleasant Side Effects" started to wake up from his Benedryl haze. Oh, no!

 

Yes, boys and girls, the troll is back.

 

He has a concoction of benzos that he's going to put into the water stream. He's heading over to the ocean to contaminate the world.

 

But wait! What's that on the horizon??

 

It's a bird, it's a plane, it's Depersonalization Woman!!! See's turned the troll into a hallucinating, gibbering, mind altering mess! The troll can't remember what he's doing. Oh, no! He's eating his own potion of benzos!

 

And now. . . .

[[co...]]

You guys are hilarious...it's late and I should try to get some more zzzzszzzs but will check back when I have a better wi-fi connection.

 

Adam-thanks for this!  I was checking up on how you were doing; you're right in the swing of things, I see!  Good for you and for us!