Please Help! Major panic attack I feel very scared of this Ativan!

[[su...]]

Hey I don't know hat else to do but post for some help on here....I seem to have been doing worse ever since I dropped my noon dose of .125 mg over 2 weeks ago. I've been having anxiety every single day and lately it will be about a bad thought come into my mind of for example a neighbor of mine who I just found out yesterday was diagnosed with breast cancer. She seems upbeat and everything but lately my min will just focus on bad things and replay them over and over in my head and will pop in and out randomly. Well when the thought pops into my head I get overcome with panic all through my body! Just a little but ago I was cleaning my fish tank and BAM out of nowhere comes the thought and whole body panic I felt like I was going to pass out!  . I was even startled out of my sleep this morning at 4 am with a panic attack and felt like I couldn't breath! Very scary! Like I said I haven't had this intense anxiety and panic until just recently and it has all started since I dropped my noon dose. This is very scary to me! I'm scared because I'm afraid of it happening again and again! My doctor today said he thinks it's either a reaction to the Ativan or its because my body is dependent on it... I'm so afraid now and don't know what is causing this problem. Should I try and taper down more tomorrow or just stay where I am?? I feel like my mind is going crazy really! Of course now as I'm typing this I am feeling better now and that panic has passed but I  tired of going through this every day it's scaring me. If anyone has any advice as to what is causing this and what I should do please help!

[[Be...]]

Hi, sunnydaze.

 

I know it is really hard to know what to do when you get into a panic cycle like that.  I can tell you that I made a point of practicing my self-calming techniques when I felt okay so they would be readily available at 4 a.m. or at the grocery store.  There are a lot of good suggestions on this thread:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=13001.msg180729#msg180729

 

One that isn't on there is blowing (big) bubbles.  For me, slowing my breathing and getting it down in my abdomen from up in my chest always helped derail the panicky feelings and that slow blowing of bubbles gave me something to focus on as I slowed my breathing and controlled it in order to blow bigger and bigger bubbles.  I know it sounds goofy, but it worked! 

 

ps.  I think that you need to be psychologically prepared to make that next cut and it doesn't sound like you are at present.  Just my opinion, of course, but I'd just hold where you are for another week and use the time to regain your confidence in the process.

[[su...]]

Beeper I will try your suggestions about the bubbles!  It is such a scary feeling to get panic attacks! I believe this was the worst one ive ever had! I cant understand why I got it it came from out of the blue!  Also would you think it would be better to split up my morning dose which is .25mg and the biggest dose of the day and instead to take .125mg (half of it) at 6am and then the other half of it at .125 mg at noon and then the other .125 mg at 5 when I normally take it? Would balancing out the doses be more helpful do you think? The way im doing it now Im only taking two doses a day and they are 10 hours apart.  Is it a common thing for wd from ativan or any benzo to cause panic attacks??

[[Be...]]

I guess splitting the morning dose is worth a try.  I'm a little surprised you can go from 5 pm to 6 am on just .125mg.  That's 13 hours between doses. 

 

Yes, panic attacks are pretty common when withdrawing from any benzo.  You might be interested in what Ashton had to say about it:

 

http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/bzcha03.htm#7

[[su...]]

I never ever took it at night for sleep or anything so maybe that's why I can go that long...I don't know but maybe my dosage drop has just finally caught up with me and this is what I'm experiencing?? I just wish I knew what to do exactly like I wish someone could say "do this" and you won't experience any more panic attacks!    that would be sooo wonderful! I do know that awhile back when I split up my doses like that back when I use to take a whole pill of .5 mg in the morning and then I split that pill in half (which I am still taking the .25 of that split now) and took 1/2 morning and 1/2 noon and then 1/4 evening.....that split even messed me up for awhile! Strange because I was still taking the same dosage just divided but it didn't matter it threw me off! I just hope this will help! Thank you for being here to talk to! It really helps me to try and stay calm.

[[su...]]

My dr. today said there's nothing to take to help withdrawal symptoms and in a way I was really upset because I really wanted to take something to help because I'm so tired of all this and afraid. But I know he doesn't want to put me on anything because he knows it will put me in a worse situation. Anyways I keep thinking this is abnormal. Why would I be having panic attacks now all of a sudden?! It makes no sense to me! I thought I should be getting better the lower my dose gets. I had another panic attack today too but not as bad as yesterday but still it has left Me in a state of worry. Do a lot of people get this?? Did you have panic attacks during withdrawal?

[[Be...]]

My dr. today said there's nothing to take to help withdrawal symptoms and in a way I was really upset because I really wanted to take something to help because I'm so tired of all this and afraid. But I know he doesn't want to put me on anything because he knows it will put me in a worse situation. Anyways I keep thinking this is abnormal. Why would I be having panic attacks now all of a sudden?! It makes no sense to me! I thought I should be getting better the lower my dose gets. I had another panic attack today too but not as bad as yesterday but still it has left Me in a state of worry. Do a lot of people get this?? Did you have panic attacks during withdrawal?

 

I'm afraid that's usually not the way it works.  You've seen people post about "waves", right?  I decided to think of w/d symptoms of signs I was healing or sometimes that my body was protesting my taking the Ativan away from it - and I wasn't going to give in!  I think the best thing to do is learn to head off those panic attacks by doing some - or all - of the suggestions on that link I gave you above.  There is nothing that will lower the chance of a panic attack like gaining the knowledge that you are in control. 

[[su...]]

What about the horrible ocd thoughts?! I never was like this before all the wd...my mind will keep bringing up the same thought about someone I know who was just diagnosed with breast cancer and shes mg neighbor...shes not upseg by it and knows it was caught early but my mind keeps thinking about it and then it will triger a panic attack. Crazy! Before it was something else my mind would obsess about. It seems to keep latching on to bad things and repeating them! This makes me afraid im going nuts!

[[Be...]]

I know obsessive thoughts are another common w/d symptom (and in The Ashton Manual) but I've often wondered why we never obsess about anything positive.    It's another manifestation of anxiety, sunnydayze, and it will eventually go away.  When you find yourself thinking that way, go take a walk and blow some bubbles.  Distraction is a powerful tool against irrational thinking. 

[[su...]]

It is dumb how we never obsess over anything positive! Also I was planning on going down to visit my parents for the week but last night got so overwhelmed by all this that I was literally terrified to go. I couldn't even bring myself to pack! But this morning I'm trying to take hold and be strong about this and not let it get me down! I'm sooo mad that it makes me feel depressed and panicky! I just kept worrying about what of I have a panic attack down there and I'm trapped and can't get out and if I would feel unsafe or something! Crazy when I love my home down there and miss my parents so much! They have been so supportive through this and so thy said they will be there to help me. So I guess I'm going to start packing and try to stay positive although I feel crappy. I'm shaky feeling right now and feel anxious already. Thank you so much for helping me.

 

Julie

[[Be...]]

Good for you, sunny!  I really think that taking some kind of positive action and facing your fears is both empowering and tends to reduce those fears.  Remember to keep deep breathing and giving yourself those positive messages. And let us know how you are doing on your trip. Good luck.