[Ca...] Posted March 20, 2012 Share Posted March 20, 2012 Just got back from a week in Florida with 2 friends. I hardly said anything the whole time! I feel SO stupid! Words don't come to me! Anyone else feel this way? Also...I dont think ANYTHING my friends say is funny. I used to die laughing with my friends and actually I would be the one to make everyone laugh. NOW my friends just annoy me. I am so depressed. I feel like I have already lost so much to this drug. I hope my friends r still there when this is over. Anyone know what I mean? Candy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [de...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Ahedonia, depersonalization. Classic temporary w/d symptoms. I am in minor withdrawal and I haven't had a good laugh until I read Coop's slight overreaction to some unsolicited advise. It is a good sign that you are able to actually travel and hang out, even if you weren't felling the vibes. It would be helpgful if you had a signature. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [de...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Nevermind. I just read your signature. You time line suggests that you are much closer to the end than the beginning. I bet you will perk up by Memorial day. I bet you look good with that Florida tan. Benzo's can't take that away from us. Sorry for sounding like a creepy old (44) guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Ca...] Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 Deerslayer, Thanks for the relies! Don't worry because I'm a 45yo dirty old lady! LOL! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[ja...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 LOL this is funny... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[On...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Candy, Yeah, I have the same thing, I go into trance like states and have trouble comprehending and I hardly care even about it. I don't really like it, but with the way I feel I'm more content in my "own little world" at times. Everyone else is moving too fast for me. I can't remember anything well enough to give good concise answers, so I just watch the world go by. Sometimes I'm sharper and I do okay, but other times I go into the catatonic state that's mentioned in the Ashton Manual. Just another symptom that will eventually go away. <b>On The Mend</b> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[sm...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 I can relate, but good for you for being able to travel, I could not do that at this stage in recovery so go you!! I hear this all comes back, so I am crossing my fingers:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [de...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Deerslayer, Thanks for the relies! Don't worry because I'm a 45yo dirty old lady! LOL! That is pretty funny. 2 days in a row with a laugh. Doesn't happen often. I just thought with your handle "candy" and that hanging out in Fla., you were a young one like Smuel. Got news for you Smuel. When you get over this hump, enjoy being a young pretty girl ( whoops, I meant lady). The next 20 will FLY by. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 der der der what did you say lol. hey i tried to buy a car today was like talking to the salesman and couldnt even tell him what i wanted needless to say I have no car. Look at least you got out. I cant even talk on the phone my kids talk to me they think im heaps normal now i must of been friggin crazy before. They like me better this way they said. My eldest said you had way to much confidence before mum now your like so good. hahahaha they think there is nothing wrong with me the 7 weeks i spent in hospital after the c/t xanax debarcle they were like you have only been gone for two weeks. so hearing you and have to agree with deerslayer the first big laugh ive had in so long was today poor Coop. Not laughing at Coop just what was said. Hi Coop hope if you see this your having a better day. I dont think we are supposed to be having fun Candy at this point in time. However im sure we will. I also want my feelings back the loving kind feelings. Lizzy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Ca...] Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 Deerslayer, STILL laughing-thanks. I understand why u thought what u did. After all it's spring break down there! lol oh tnx. Samuel, I had my trip booked before I quit benzos- thought I'd be fine by now. What an eye opener! I needed to be pushed in a wheel chair thru the airports. Luckily, the gals (deerslayer, NOT girls lol) have husbands and kids at home like I did and didnt want to go out. We got a mini frig and ALL I had to do was walk to the elevator and walk straight out the back door of the hotel to the pool right there and beach. Yes I was depersonalized and catatonic-like BUT my friends were also drinking a lot of the time...thus I was also annoyed by this behavior (because I wasn't drinking) & I also wanted a frozen drink myself. On the mend, thanks for the reply. I wonder what Ashton manual says about this? Candy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Ca...] Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 Lizzy, Der der der huh?!!!!!! LOLOLOL! U tried to buy a car?! That right there, is WAY funnier than either coop or I!!!! I cant EVEN decide which type of bread to buy!!! And ur kids like u better now? Hahaha! Maybe I'll have MORE friends when this is over! lol thanks peeps, love CANDY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 that der der der is me trying to talk hehehe maybe we are funnier than we think. like some benzo humour amongst the misery. however its 10.30 at night here im in my prime i go down hill while i sleep. in the morning i will be posting doom and gloom thats how I roll. I would miss everyone so much here when im better and ill have to go and find more friends. I got an invitation in the mail today for a party i posted it on the fridge and there it will stay way after the party is over because i just cant go. One day i will return to life of the party but not just yet. Hugs Lizzy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Ca...] Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 Lizzy, That's right! One day we WILL return to the life of the party. Maybe friends will miss us? Ive been trying to read and play words with friends, hanging with friends (seeing I cant hang with real friends), scramble ect. Of course I lose every game I play.(I usually play with random peeps so my REAL friends cant see how stupid Ive become in my old age) Seeing my brain is creating new pathways, I'm hoping for an EVEN better brain this time! lol x Candy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 hahaha Candy WHAT you can still read here i was thinking you were sssssstruggling good girl I can read but maybe the front cover of a book and i love reading i miss it so much. Perhaps you are right we will turn out so intelligent and renewed. Its funny but a lot of my other horrible traits are gone severe ocd gone and other things ive noticed so im hoping we will be better people in the end. Everynow and then i play scrabble on FB thats about it. Lizzy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Sa...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Funny conversation. Lol. I also have a hard time holding a conversation, and I'm going to college at the moment so there's a lot of people to deal with. I just start to stutter and I have a really hard to finding what's best to say at that moment. Also, It's weird but I some of the time I have trouble hearing what others have to say. This withdrawal stuff sucks... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 hey Sam You are doing so well being in College that is fantastic. Just fake it till you make it thats all I can say. You are obviously still doing ok or you would be on the couch with a lot of us lol. I think the thing is when we go to talk we are frightened that we wont make sense so no wonder you start to stutter. At least you are off the stuff give yourself a pat on the back. Lizzy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[jo...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Just got back from a week in Florida with 2 friends. I hardly said anything the whole time! I feel SO stupid! Words don't come to me! Anyone else feel this way? Also...I dont think ANYTHING my friends say is funny. I used to die laughing with my friends and actually I would be the one to make everyone laugh. NOW my friends just annoy me. I am so depressed. I feel like I have already lost so much to this drug. I hope my friends r still there when this is over. Anyone know what I mean? Candy Yes, I know what you mean. I haven't been on holiday, but noticed exactly what you said when I was socializing. This has put me off seeing people, but also, in withdrawal, I notice that some friends were never really friends anyway, and that is really lonely, as I have no one left. I also have a hard time holding a conversation, and I'm going to college at the moment so there's a lot of people to deal with. I just start to stutter and I have a really hard to finding what's best to say at that moment. Also, It's weird but I some of the time I have trouble hearing what others have to say. This withdrawal stuff sucks... Hi Sam I have always found it hard to say what is best to say in that moment, but it's worse with benzos and it makes me feel vulnerable in the face of negativity from others, as they can exploit my delays in response. I have trouble hearing too, what others are saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [de...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Thats easy for you guys to say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 say what deerslayer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [de...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 These go to eleven (movie reference). Who ever names it gets to take 1 mg of xanax tonight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [...] Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 hahahaha your witty today Lizzy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Ca...] Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 deerslayer, u r talking ova my head now. I see that Xanax isnt ur drug of choice...How 'bout some K for u? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest [de...] Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Teh mvoie wsa tihs si spnial tpa. As far as drugs of choice, about a year ago my pharmacy changed its generic clonazepam. I felt some minor w/d with this new source. So I goggled something along the line of " relative quality of generic benzo's". Immediately it hit on several junkie message boards with posts like " dude avoid the Mylan brand, totally sucks. CVS carries Sandoz, gets you much higher". I feel bad for these folks taking this stuff for fun. I also feel cheated. I wound up an addict ( I am not afraid to use that word ) by taking K as prescribed and I never experienced a lick of fun in the process. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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