4 weeks without Diazepam, feels like the other side of the mirror

[[Do...]]

4 weeks without Diazepam. A bit tough, very tough. But I never thought this would be possible. At least now I am able to read in this forum. Yesterday most of the day I felt better most of the day, had a walk in the park for an hour. I'am still afraid of many things (I was mugged, left unconscious in the street  20 months ago, and had a stroke 6 months later). I feel my mind is a bit foggy, as if it was floating in my head, I have tinitus, tachycardia often. I am not very active. Lots of symptoms but reading through the forum show me I am not the only one. I am a bit concerned by the antidepressant -Venlafaxine, as I have the feeling this stuff is useless and causes other problems.

[[Do...]]

I find it difficult to go out. In some way i feel as if I had some sort of hangover, blurred vision, moving spots. I feel only about me in an obsessive way. I lost touch with people, the idea of work. But it's the first time in my life I said to myself: "my health first". I realise those drugs made me far worse than I was.

[[Sc...]]

First off, congrats on being 1 month free of benzos.  A BIG accomplishment!

 

Benzos really can affect the way we think about ourselves and others for awhile.  We have been "numbed" by these meds and now our central nervous system has to take some time to figure things out and with that comes some blunted emotions, or even emotions that are extreme.  I could go from extreme happiness to complete sadness and sobbing all in one day.  I think putting yourself first is what is best for many during this.  I had to let my friends know I may not be "present" for awhile and most were very understanding. 

 

You will come out of this shell.  It does happen.  I am now 8 months off and living a pretty "normal" life.  I still hit some major bumps, but I am much more social and enjoy the company of others more than I have in years.  I still have those days though where I'd like to shut the world out for a bit - but maybe everyone has that some days. 

 

Most would tell you that 1 month is early in the game, and it is for many of us.  But you're not always going to be like this.  Great things are on their way and the longer you are off, the closer you are to fully healing.  The blurred vision was a HUGE one for me, but it is fading away more and more.  The obsessive thinking about just about anything is extremely common for many of us. 

 

Hang in there and I'm glad you find comfort in reading through the forum. 

 

ALL the best to you and take care,

Schatje

[[os...]]

I think it´s awesome you are off the Valium period, as Shatje says, hang in there, you are free and the better stuff is yours, just take it a day at a time, you´ve already made it so keep it in the day and let time take care of you. I wish you better days ahead and soon.

 

Oscar

[[An...]]

4 weeks without Diazepam. A bit tough, very tough. But I never thought this would be possible. At least now I am able to read in this forum. Yesterday most of the day I felt better most of the day, had a walk in the park for an hour. I'am still afraid of many things (I was mugged, left unconscious in the street  20 months ago, and had a stroke 6 months later). I feel my mind is a bit foggy, as if it was floating in my head, I have tinitus, tachycardia often. I am not very active. Lots of symptoms but reading through the forum show me I am not the only one. I am a bit concerned by the antidepressant -Venlafaxine, as I have the feeling this stuff is useless and causes other problems.

 

Hi Dom Paul

 

I am so pleased you are benzo free and are on the way to recovery.  Was shocked to hear about the mugging - poor you!  It's just unbelievable how another human being can be so heartless.

 

I just wanted to comment on the Venlafaxine.  I have been on it twice - the first time at 150mg from 2002 for 8 years for a minor depressive incident but the doctor thought I should stay on it as "it wasn't doing me any harm" and I was just so zombie like and nothing fazed me so I agreed.  I did come off it with no medical guidance in about 2 weeks and did not suffer any withdrawals - I am glad I did not read the forums then.  I remember feeling as if a cloud had lifted, I was less tired and I got my emotions back - was able to cry etc.

 

I was put back on 150mg in the spring of 2011 when I was undergoing benzo withdrawals.  My new doctor now wants me off it and I have managed to reduce to 75mg with no problem.  I am going to stay on this for a while as I am facing quite a stressful family situation.  However, even with the reduction, I am feeling a zillion times better - my head is much clearer and I am pleased I have done it.

 

There was no question of reducing or coming off this drug whilst I was in the throes of withdrawal.  I am not sure if it helped or not but I did not suffer depression - I think it was making me foggy but then the withdrawals were having a similar effect and I cannot tell which was which.

 

I hope this helps.

 

Good luck with your recovery.

 

Angel

 

 

[[Do...]]

It's not the first time I have Venlafaxine. But as far as I can remember it's one of the most difficult antidepressant to stop. One of those things doctors gave me to help me stop from benzo telling me it would help me! It just seems it was adding another problem to the benzo problem. Not feeling you are unwell, does not mean you are unwell. It's just like putting a lock on the cupboard of my problems and eventually losing the key.

 

Something I have been doing for about two years now, maybe more is about 15/20 minutes once or twice a day meditations. Those I do are close to yoga way of thinking and integrate yoga breathing. I also do therapy. in my case schema therapy and CBT. once or twice a week.

 

Just somewhat upsetting not to have support from my family. People don't realise getting of those drugs is sort of a full time job

[[De...]]

Hi DomPaul,

Firstly congratulations on being benzo free. You have done so well !

Sorry to hear what you have been through.

I have taken benzos longterm and am currently tapering. You are so right it is a full time job.

It is still early days for you in terms of recovery. I wish you speedy healing.

Debbie.