Jackie Browne

[Guest [de...]]

You doing OK with your X to V c/o.

 

Been thinking of you.

 

DS

[[ja...]]

Hi Dearslayer, Well i wished i hadnt ate peanut butter crackers for breakfast this am. Other then that my sx are a bit different this week i feel like the flu joint pain, neck pain jaw pain. No energy. I have my doc appointment this am, I dont tell him much because he likes running test and there is no reason for that. Sometimes i ? if i should have c/o. But i know i couldnt come off the xanax the w/d was horrible. So now i just have to make it. How are you? What are you dealing with? Oh how i would love to go to a great dinner and hang with friends and have fun and feel good. Is that to much to ask?

[Guest [de...]]

Jackie

 

Funny you should mention flu joint pain. I had a terrible case of it on Tuesday. My only symptom. I was convinced that I was coming down with a virus. Then it was gone the next day. Other than that I feel fine, although a bit hyperactive. Is there ANY symptom that is not attributable to Benzo's. I am hoping thst my recent hair loss ( I am 44 ) is benzo related, being as that it is on the list. With my luck, it is probably benzo unrelated.

 

You will gain confidence as your c/o progresses. You are having some symptoms, but it sounds like you are managing it. I have lowered my expectations. Any day where I am not flipping out is a good day. Any night where I sleep 5 hours is a good night.

[[ja...]]

Thats pretty funny the flipping out stuff. Interesting this flu stuff. Im not felling it at all right now infact i feel not bad now. Went to doc. He was so nice to me very careing wrote my script for 150 more valium I see him once a month but worth it to get off of this. Your right im feeling more confident. Still a little nervous for the big day. Taper . I know im going to make it i cant wait.  About the hair loss, dont you think hair is over rated?  Just kidding Im sure its these darn benzos. Ive heard other people say they are losing hair. Anyway the temperature is 81 here today i might have to go some where. Hope your day goes well. Keep in touch 

[Guest [de...]]

I know that we are not suppoosed to be too personal, but your weather reference suggests that you are an American, possibly living in the mid-Atlantic states ( bunch of Limeys on BB). I watched Trainspotting last night. I couldn't imagine dealing with w/d and Scottish weather at the same time ( interesting note..That mole on Ian Mckeown's (sp?)right cheekbone turned out to be a malignant melanoma). I live in Central Va where it is 86 degrees. Somehow this nice weather makes everything feel just a bit better.

 

Any way, regarding the looming taper, somehow that doesn't seem as daunting as the the crossover. At least the taper you can take real slow. Even a slow crossover is not completely asymptomatic. Mine has not been nearly as hard as I feared. I anticipate that March 17 I will take my last .125 K and March 18 I will be completely c/o to V. And if I feel "stable", I will make my first 1mg cut on March 25.

 

Before you know it you will have that horrible X out of your system, and a major part of the battle will be behind you.

[[ja...]]

Are you going to cut every week or 2?And you will be at 30 mg? Im sure you told me but my brain has a mind of its own.  So what does your plan look like? just interested

[Guest [de...]]

I will be at 16mg. I think 1 mg per week cut is optimistic, but I will give it a try. I imagine that a few weeks of that and I will feel some w/d. I will not make any cuts if I am having any symptoms. I am not trying to win a race.

 

If I recall, you will c/o at 40V. Based on the literature and what others have reported, you could probably start with 2mg cuts until you get below 20, and maybe a bit longer. The key this is to space the cuts far enough so that you give your body time to "feel" the cuts before you make new ones. In my opinion, with V, this means spacing by a minumum of a week, and probably closer to 10 days.

 

When I see people cut a long half live drug every 2 or 3 days, then complain about severe w/d after 10 days, I get frustrated. The Ashton guidelines exist for a reason, and that is because they resulted from years of experience on actual people. Stick to the beaten path and things will only be a little bit sucky. At least we are all used to that.

[[ja...]]

I hear you, I feel the same way. Not only that but my doc has ashtons taper from 40 mg that i gave him. Im sure he would like me to go every week, but im sure he will be fine with 2 weeks. Besides i come see him once a month. He is making good money just to write the script and chat a little for possibly over a year or longer. You be careful with the 1 mg cut every week. That makes me nervous and at 16 mg wow. I do hope it goes really well for you and i believe it wil because your atitude is fantastic. You rub off on me thanks. 

[[ja...]]

Hi dearslayer, how you doing with your taper? just thinkng about you.

[Guest [de...]]

Thanks for asking. No K since march 17 pm. With the exception of poor sleep on Sunday and a total evil temper tantrum at work on Monday AM, it has been a breeze.I feel great today. if I feel this good  tomorrow ang Friday, i will initiate my first small step to zero by going from 16 to 15.

 

Thanks for asking.

 

Where are you in your c/o? You feeling OK?

[[ja...]]

Are you going to cut 5 or 7 days? I want to hear how that goes for you. I feel like you are very determand and i think thats great. All my best for your cut. I have substituded .75 mg xanax so far for 15 mg valium. Its getting better. I still cry at the drop of a hat. and muscle pain still some burning but im dealing. Ive noticed this afternoon i feel so tired. I sleep pretty good at night I am on bioidentical progesterone and estrogen, i think that helps with sleep. I also have been told progesterone works on the same gaba as benzos. Well all i can say is i will deal with that later. I would be a mess if i tapered that too now. So i will leave that for now. I feel like we cant worry about everything or we will be a mess. Besides if i took an a/d id have to ween that too. Im going to try and not take anything else if i can help it. Sorry way to long. you would think i was giving a speach or something.  Jackie

[Guest [de...]]

Thats great, you are almost halfway c/o and no slammage. Good for you. Cry away. Supposedly tears are full of cortisol. Gotta unload that stuff.

 

I will probably push the envelope on my taper. 1 mg every 5 to 7 days. I will hit some withdrawal at some point and I will slow down. I need to understand how my brain deals with V discontinuation. Although I expect some minor w/d (which I will respond to by slowing down), I am unlikely to be slammed. We must carefully experiment.

 

i will keep you informed. The X to v co will work great for you. Valium just feels less harsh for me that K.

[[ja...]]

Im to scared to do 7 days  i wishi was brave like you. keep me posted and good luck

[Guest [de...]]

Brave? Me?

 

You are taking care of a spinal cord injured son and dealing with these horrible med issues. You are far more a model of bravery than I will ever be.

 

DS

[[ja...]]

Sorry i think you are thinking of someone else i dont have small children anymore and none with spinal cord injury. I had a spinal cord injury, maybe thats what your thinking

[Guest [de...]]

Whoa my mistake. I confuses you with Feelingbetter. Hey we all inspire eachother with our communication and shared travails.

[[ja...]]

Have a great day Deerslayer, Im off to work then grocerys  Not my favorite thing to do. Talk later Love Jackie

[Guest [de...]]

Jackie

 

I am going to discontinue my participation on this board. Too many scolding PM's from a certain administrator. I am sure that things will go great for you if you stick to your program. Lots of great smart people on this board. It has been helpful to me and I hope I have been helpful to others.

 

DS

[[ja...]]

Deerslayer i totally do not understand you are getting scolded. Its fine if you have to go, but i really dont know why, could you explain am i missing something here? I feel i should at least know whats going on. Am i doing something wrong? Please reply back so i understand.

[Guest [de...]]

Jackie

 

Of course you have done nothing wrong. You are probably my closest "buddie" on this board.

 

Read the threads started by NICUNURSE about 2 weeks ago, one started last night by Feelingsleepyyet (excellent person by the way). When I see people in the healthcare profession having problems, I tend to get extremely blunt in the advice I give. I don't mind if a poster disagrees with me on a forum, but a particularly administrator sends condescending (in my opinion) PM's ( including on the referred to posts). She has also PM'ed me saying that I am "borderline prescriptive", which I also disagree with. So it has turned into a Nurse Ratched vs RP MacMurphy situation.

 

I understand that a sensitive community such as this one requires rules and structure. And I believe that I have followed them. But there is something about my style of discourse that really bothers a certain type. So to avoid further conflict with this individual I have requested that my account be terminated which will be effective on Sat at 9:00 am.

 

Anyway, I have the greatest confidence that you and I will both escape this pharmaceutical situation unharmed and the stronger for it. There are lots of smart and kind people on this board. If you have a technical question, or a difficult situation you want to discuss there are many people here who can help ( I find Flea, Challis99 and yram to be amongst the smartest ones out there).

 

Wish you well

 

DS

[[ja...]]

Well please dont let this interfare with your taper. I know you wont. Keep on trucking i believe you will be off these meds soon too. I will miss talking with you and want you to know i have faith you wil come out far better then you were before. Please take care of your self and i will keep you in my prayers. Your friend and BB Jackie  many Hugs to you.

[[Ho...]]

deerslayer,

 

My personal message to you was on the heels of several complaints from members of this forum. This is not personal, as you've made it out to be. I am acting on behalf of the members as well as the BB team.

 

To make this seem as though it's a personal problem between you and I, is nonsense.

 

You agreed to the rules of the forum as have all of our member, when you registered. The rules are there for a reason. They are not MY rules, they are rules that have been painstakingly created over years and years of running this forum by the owner of BenzoBuddies.

 

I'm sorry if you feel that you're being singled out but you are being held to the same standards as all our members are.

 

I'm not going to have a back and forth on this thread with you. I sent you a private message to avoid this. You chose to bring this private moderation issue out to the main forum.

 

You have asked that your membership be deleted and it shall on the date discussed. If you have further problems you wish to discuss, please feel free to PM me, or better yet, if you feel you've been mistreated you may contact the owner of this forum, Colin .

 

Hope

[Guest [de...]]

Hope

 

While I don't admit to any rule violations (other than cussing), and question the exist of the raft of complaints to which you refer, I respect your devotion to this board and all the the people who you are endeavoring to help. I think Colin did a service to humanity by creating this resource which has helped thousands, including myself. i have gotten some PM's asking me to stay, which I will not, but I have opined to those individuals, that I am far from the only smart guy in this community ( which you already know), and that BB is really the best online resource around. I wish you the best of luck in your K taper.

 

DS

[[Co...]]

Hope

 

While I don't admit to any rule violations (other than cussing), and question the exist of the raft of complaints to which you refer, I respect your devotion to this board and all the the people who you are endeavoring to help. I think Colin did a service to humanity by creating this resource which has helped thousands, including myself. i have gotten some PM's asking me to stay, which I will not, but I have opined to those individuals, that I am far from the only smart guy in this community ( which you already know), and that BB is really the best online resource around. I wish you the best of luck in your K taper.

 

DS

 

Hello deerslayer,

 

I can assure you, there have indeed been several complaints from members - not that moderation action directly arises simply because we have received complaints.

 

We have rules regarding prescriptive language and respecting other members viewpoint. Your account was already flagged by the team before we received complaints from members, but I don't wish to overstate the problem. It seemed to the team that some of your comments were pushing the boundaries of 'mutual respect' we expect from members. It is not that we considered you a troublemaker or that you were creating major problems. However, given that (several) members have reported similar feelings about some of your comments, you were contacted by Hope to appraise you of the problem. I understand that you have medical qualifications, but it is made explicit in the rules that medical qualifications do not excuse individual members from adopting a non-prescriptive writing style.

 

Additional Advice & Guidelines (from the Rules):

 

Please adopt a non-prescriptive writing style. Relating your experiences, stating options, or posting suggestions of what other members might do, are all welcome. However, advising members of what they should or must do is against the ethos of the BenzoBuddies Community. Nor should you attempt to 'diagnose' medical problems or suggest medical treatments for other members. This policy also applies to members with medical qualifications. A more detailed explanation of this policy can be found in our Guidelines Regarding the Giving of Medical Advice document.

 

This was not a major issue. I don't know why you chose to the bring this matter to the open forum. For what it is worth, writing style / prescriptive language aside, I (and the team) thought you had a lot to offer. I am only sorry that you could not accept the constructive heads-up PM from Hope in its intended spirit.

 

Good luck with your withdrawal/recovery. If you change your mind about us deleting your account, let us know. If you decide to return later with a new account, you will be most welcome.

 

Colin.

[Guest [de...]]

Colin

 

Thank for addressing me personally and again, thanks for the great service that you have provided for me as well as thousands of others. I totally understand risk management, and you have to keep real tight rules on this board. Evidently you have personally been a target of malicious people who have sought to undermine your mission, and I assume you have dealt with many more problems in this regard than you have made public. I can't change my basic personality, and I do not want to become a distraction for you or your administrators. The last thing this board needs is drama from the likes of me. I want you to know that the individuals who have contacted me, pleading me to stay, have heard my opinion about BB, which is that it is the best benzo board that I have found, and that there are many very smart and experienced members who will provide excellent advice and support. I have even referred them to specific individuals who I think are better than myself.

 

DS