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Everything is backwards


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Does anyone feel like everything is backwards in terms of their emotions?

 

Like I am angry or afraid of those I love the most. Yesterday my husband mentioned one of my favorite cities and I felt dread--WTF??? Today I saw an ad selling one of my all time favorite comedies and I felt disgust.

 

Wtf??? Does anyone have similar issues???  I wonder what causes this???

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I saw a photo of my fave singer the other day and i had no interest in her at all, i heard her latest song also and i found it to be the biggest piece of garbage going... i KNOW this is withdrawal... i can´t connect to it at all... it´s probably that it is really not even on my list of  life stuff right now, i have abandoned facebook too, just not interested, a few weeks ago i was on there 24/7.

 

Weird stuff eh?

 

Oscar

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Yes, VERY weird indeed.

 

I wonder if this is a part of Derealization (DR):

"Derealization refers to experiencing familiar people and surroundings as if they were unfamiliar, strange, or unreal."

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I saw a photo of my fave singer the other day and i had no interest in her at all, i heard her latest song also and i found it to be the biggest piece of garbage going... i KNOW this is withdrawal... i can´t connect to it at all... it´s probably that it is really not even on my list of  life stuff right now, i have abandoned facebook too, just not interested, a few weeks ago i was on there 24/7.

 

Weird stuff eh?

 

Oscar

 

I did same thing, thought a certain group was the all the time BEST, got a bunch of their concerts in DVD and loved them, now have NO interest in them!!

FB bores me, its nothing but brag book, used to love it.

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For me, it's not just that I don't like these anymore...things that I used to like/love are not just neutral to me...it's like I get the opposite feeling from what it always was (now fear/disgust/anger) :( WTF is this?!?!?!?
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I think it is the brain distorting everything ... don't know why ... it just is.  Have you seen this youtube video of one of our members talking about how the brain turns everything to dark and negative?  I thought it was a great description of what happens to some people during w/d.  It does get better and is a phase of healing ... that I can promise as I went thru this too.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4ONGJr1WD0&context=C36c84c2ADOEgsToPDskKq6av8bL8ZMrVsN3PEvSMY

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Thanks Whoopsie!  Will check it out.  Glad it's better for you now.  It's the most heart-wrenching thing especially when it comes to family...I just cry and cry because I can't feel the right emotions for them...and I ADORED them!!!!! 

 

Oh, yes, I've seen this video before!  Thanks for reminding me of it.

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I'm the same way, mmir, all the things I love are now gone (even though they are present.)  I used to get this feeling of peace when I looked at the sky, and now, it feels like horror.  I've been afraid of my family, and my guitar, both of which are very precious to me in different ways of course.  This is the cruelest mind affliction in existence! :(
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You are welcome and you do still ADORE them or you wouldn't care so much about what is happening now.  The brain is wonky right now and it is not you.  I read this, this morning in a daily reader I have and it spoke to me about this:  "I used to believe thinking was the highest function of human beings ... I now realize loving is our supreme function.  The heart precedes the mind."  :)
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You are welcome and you do still ADORE them or you wouldn't care so much about what is happening now.  The brain is wonky right now and it is not you.  I read this, this morning in a daily reader I have and it spoke to me about this:  "I used to believe thinking was the highest function of human beings ... I now realize loving is our supreme function.  The heart precedes the mind."  :)

 

You're correct in what you said to mmir, I do still care for them too, but as mmir stated, it's all backwards.  To me I can actually feel like an evil presence in everything (nothing I ever actually believed in before all this mess) and it feels as though I'm being hunted by a super natural power.  Also, at this very moment, I stare out my window into the yard -- I do not see my yard, but a twisted copy from Hell.  I actually drive over a hundred miles per day because it feels as though something is chasing me, and I can't escape it -- even though I know better.  Wonky is right, my brain is not my own.

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It is just so damn sad what these drugs are doing to people.  :'(  Stick close guys, you will overcome this darkness.  :mybuddy:
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Wtbna, do you have issues with your clothes? I feel yucky a :-*bout all my clothes and can only wear plain tshirts and pants...
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Wtbna, do you have issues with your clothes? I feel yucky a :-*bout all my clothes and can only wear plain tshirts and pants...

 

My clothing issues are the kind where I cannot wear a certain color if I'm afraid of it on a particular day.  I feel if I wear red on a certain day, that something bad will happen.  I also have some weird issues with my body where I will look down at my arms and they appear like they did in the 4th grade or something.. extremely disturbing.

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Also, it feels weird to look at the clothes I wore before w/d.. as if they belong to someone else.  It feels disgusting in a sense.
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It´s just the brain´s perception is off kilter, i can look at a photo of myself and i don´t recognize that as being me BUT it is not me that is having that as a thing... it is just the drug/wd and it will pass, it´s weird and can be seen as alarming but it´s just temporary, everything can be seen in a strange way in w/d but it is not a permanent thing... it´s a form of depersonalization, it can be even more insidious if it is slight in my opinion.

 

We are not permanently damaged!!!

 

Oscar

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It´s just the brain´s perception is off kilter, i can look at a photo of myself and i don´t recognize that as being me BUT it is not me that is having that as a thing... it is just the drug/wd and it will pass, it´s weird and can be seen as alarming but it´s just temporary, everything can be seen in a strange way in w/d but it is not a permanent thing... it´s a form of depersonalization, it can be even more insidious if it is slight in my opinion.

 

We are not permanently damaged!!!

 

Oscar

 

Thanks for the encouragement, Oscar. :)

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Hi Whoopsie! Did this take long to resolve?  I am losing my patience with it!  I don't know how my brain can take a loving feeling and change it into fear or anger in a flash.  WTF??!?!?  I just hate it!
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