2 months somewhat benzo free!

[[Le...]]

December 30th was my last dose of Xanex. Yesterday I celebrated two months being somewhat benzo free. What I mean by somewhat is that occasionally I would take an Ambien not knowing it was the same class of drug to sleep. I would say in the past two months I probably took it 5 or 6 x's. While my two months have been challenging it has been worth it to know that I am started on freeing myself not only from this drug but gaining my life back. The past three days have been very difficult. I have been experiencing chest and back tightness and pain, lower back pain, dizziness, headaches, shortness of breath, waves of panic and anxiety, tightness in my throat area, and recent new s/x of sweating during my sleep. While I have always been somewhat of an insomniac my sleep patterns have only been interupted a small amount. I was at Disney the other day and these side effects sent me home after only a few hours as I was unable to enjoy myself. Now that I know ambien is a benzo I will not be taking that again. Another thing I noticed when taking it is that it seemed to aggravate my withdraw s/x so if you are taking any benzo medication be sure to be aware of what it is your taking so you won't be surprised when you have an attack. The d/r and d/p only pop up when I have intrusive thoughts that I am going to die or something is severely wrong with me. My energy levels are very low which has led to weight gain but once this passes I will get back in it. I am proud to report two months xanex free and I will overcome this beast. Do any of you feel the same s/x I do? I also get shooting pains through my body. I pray everyday that I will wake up and this hell will be over and I can tell you that I have had good days which are incentive to keep going. No matter how hard it gets I know it's worth it! Prayers for you all.

[[Ga...]]

Hey Leo,

 

Congratulations on getting to 2 months. I am slightly ahead of you at 3 months. Much of what you desrcibed is familiar to me in my withdrawal. I had been doing OK for a while but got hit with some DR and increased anxiety a few days back. I am hoping that has peaked now. It is a time of ups and downs for sure. Those good days should start to be more frequent soon and from what I understand, the bad periods become less severe. It is good that you discovered that Ambien is a problem too. I did a rapid taper previously  which was tough and I felt I had to reinstate to come down more slowly. I found that it took a while to feel somewhat normal after starting up again. Possibly, the odd Ambien at this stage in your recovery was confusing your system hence the bad reaction. 2 months is great matey. Am pleased for you.

[[Le...]]

GazTop,

  Thank you for responding. I sometimes feel so alone on here sometimes and it's so great to hear that someone is experiencing similar things that I am. I know people are afraid to speak or comment but I feel the conversation and connection help me get through this. The days feel so long and I can't wait to get back to normal. I can tell things are changing and that when the episodes pass that I can feel that it was less severe then my interdosal withdraws felt. Today just has been a rough one. Been hit by waves of nausea and rushes of adrenaline for no reason. Thanks for the encouragement and not being afraid to reply. I need people if I am going to make it through this because the folks who are in my life don't understand it at all. I always get told that I go there because I allow myself to go there that by changing my view will help change the reaction. They have no idea what they are talking about. Thank you again and congrats on your three months. Can't wait to get there.

[[Ga...]]

I also would be fairly isolated without this site and the support available. This is a profound experience for all of us and it is very hard to describe to others in a way that could be understood. In one way, this is good since I don't want people I know to have any experience like this. I've made a number of posts on here and received great responses from compassionate people- don't be afraid to ask questions. Also, remember that this is a physiological problem with psychological symptoms. Until that rights itself, which it will, try not to be too hard on yourself.