[...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Why continue living if I cannot feel love, if I feel such a disconnect to those I loved so much? If I feel like half of my brain belongs to someone else, someone evil, an animal... I have nothing to live for...if I cannot enjoy life little pleasures...if a bird singing irritates me, if the sun makes me sad or afraid... I can't see this getting any better...I have lost all hope... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[sh...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 I feel you! I am in the same boat right now but something keeps me afloat- my mind seems to be running on autopilot- everyone says "you will get better" but when I am in this dark place it feels like it will never happen. But I just prayed and saw your plea and feel like I have to help, it makes me feel better. Don't give up- we have to get through this and do something to stop others from going through this. We can pull through! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Ho...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Oh MMIR...these are my sentiments exactly today. I am truly ready to give up. Hopefully someone will be by to offer words of encouragement to both of us. I hope you feel better soon. Hope Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 I'm sorry you're feeling so hopeless right now. Like you say in your signature IT'S THE MEDS NOT YOU. In time you will feel love again, you will be yourself again, you will be able to enjoy life's little pleasures. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[sw...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Because this is temporary and you will have a happier life once it's over. Best wishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[os...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 I feel for you i really do. Listen, i have been tapering for 7 months and a few days ago i was afraid for my sanity... i thought "how can i go on like this for another year before i am even free?" I held since 2 days ago and today, it lifted... i felt stable and sane... i even cried as it CONFIRMED it was NOT ME, it is simply the MEDS. You WILL be you again, you WILL heal... Good days are so hard to remember when you feel bad but KNOW that they will come back, just breathe... distract and be assured that it is a TEMPORARY state... it is not even you. ALL WILL COME RIGHT AND THEN SOME, JOY AND HAPPINESS AND EMOTIONS, SO HANG IN THERE OK?!!!!! I know i have a LOT to go through to even get free, yet i KNOW this will be over, just like it will be for you, life WILL be great again. Oscar Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Ho...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Why continue living if I cannot feel love, if I feel such a disconnect to those I loved so much? If I feel like half of my brain belongs to someone else, someone evil, an animal... I have nothing to live for...if I cannot enjoy life little pleasures...if a bird singing irritates me, if the sun makes me sad or afraid... I can't see this getting any better...I have lost all hope... Hi mmir, I know it's hard to see this now but this is temporary. This will not go on for the rest of your life. The people in your life that you feel disconnected to now will once again be your loved ones who you can love. Part of what you're thinking is due to withdrawals. However, I'm worried about you.I know this is temporary and many who have posted here know it's temporary but you can't see it right now. I'm going to leave you some hotlines to call and some other resources. I'd like you to get to an ER asap. This type of thinking is very dangerous for you. Here are some resources: http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=9681.msg124366#post_suicide-self-harm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Ga...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 If I didnt have nature, Id go nuts. I like being outside in my yard. Have flowers growing, i watch the squirrels, birds, etc. Its keeping me sane a few mo ago I felt strange being outside now its nice. It doesnt seem too bright outside like it did a few mos ago. Its slowly coming back:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[WT...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Please just keep pushing through, mmir, it's going to get better. I know how you feel about the sun -- if I think about the sun, I get this instance of horror. I feel like it's alive and is hunting me or something, and I hate how crazy that makes me feel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Li...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 To all those suffering and filled with little or no hope, please stay the course. You are going to wake up one morning with a sense of relief and calm. You are going to get through this and help others that are on this same journey. It takes time - - you need to dig deep and fortify your will to keep going! Believe that tomorrow will be a brighter day. Believe tomorrow will bring you one day closer to full recovery. Believe! Take care, Lida Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[pi...] Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 I know just how you feel, I also felt that way before. I couldn't feel anything and felt life was passing me by. It does get better , you just hold on tight and keep believing. I watched countless movies during taper and withdrawal just to distract me. Late last summer I watched one of the movies again, it was a comedy and I really laughed . It felt so good to do that. I know I didn't laugh when I saw it the first time. These wonderful feelings will come back little by little. They are really there, just clouded over by the remnants of these meds. There is always something to live for, I wrote down all the things I wanted to do and I am slowly going through my list now and doing them. PG Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[...] Posted March 1, 2012 Author Share Posted March 1, 2012 Thanks all for your support. My husband has been with me all day...still hanging on by the fingernails and waiting for my miracle! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[WT...] Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Stay strong, and know I'm in it with you, all the mad fear and out of character symptoms. We MUST beat this stuff -- I don't want this to rob me of my life, because I know if I get my life back, I will be forever grateful for all the simple things in a way that I could have never imagined before. And trust me, I appreciated the simple things quite a bit before w/d. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[be...] Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 mmir, Sorry that you feeling so bad. This is a video I like to send people that can help you get thru those moments that you feel like your just not going to make it. Save this video and watch it every time you need it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPFVfMYjpcE You will get thru this. I am now two years and just about healed. I ct'd off alot of meds and had every sx in wikipedia. IF I CAN HEAL SO CAN YOU! PROMISE! Hugs! Believe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Li...] Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 All, below is a link to a website that explains (gives treatment tips as well) why our CNS may be frozen in over-drive after going through the trauma of withdrawal. It helped me to get through my most difficult days and I hope it will help others. http://www.helpguide.org/mental/emotional_psychological_trauma.htm Happy Thursday! Take care, Lida Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[...] Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 mmir One day, in the not too distant future; you will view life like this again: “Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.” Ashley Smith the best to you pj Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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