More and more physical pain....more and more mental dysfunction

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I am have this weird feeling that is so painful all over the back side of my body. It's so weird and undescribable. Burning and pins and needles in my extremities and headaches. Mentally I feel like I'm about to be incapable of speaking or paying attention to anything. Having such extreme d/p, d/r, and fog. I'm not sure be able to even post on here or read here much longer. My wifes words and presence used to provide so much comfort and now it doesn't help me at all, and yet somehow I'm still way worse when she isn't around, like I need someone to watch me suffer. Holding has never helped before and I feel it would be stupid to do it now when I'm so close to the end of my taper. And yet, the day before valentines was somewhat manageable. How, why? I don't want to get worse, but what can I do. Holding never helped, updosing probably wouldn't help and just prolong my suffering. I'm at .1 mg klonopin now. Started at the end of September so it's probably best I'm not on them much longer, but why am I suffering so bad. It's never been tolerable.

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I'm sorry you're suffering, coop.

We are all so different in what we experience during tapering and withdrawal.

Hang in there.  You're almost free.

[[Ru...]]

Hey coop just wanted to say I feel the exact same way most of the time as what you are describing wish I knew how to make it stop.

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Nothing is the same anymore and I hate this evil dark painful world I now am trapped in. Every second is consumed by that torturous pain or the scared thoughts of the good life I once had and will never have again. Everything is impossible because it hurts physically, mentally, emotionally, or all always. Does it really get better? How? It doesn't make sense that it's possible.

[[pa...]]

Nothing is the same anymore and I hate this evil dark painful world I now am trapped in. Every second is consumed by that torturous pain or the scared thoughts of the good life I once had and will never have again. Everything is impossible because it hurts physically, mentally, emotionally, or all always. Does it really get better? How? It doesn't make sense that it's possible.

 

Hi Coop,  Yes, I know nothing feels the same any more.  The drug affect is creating the evil dark painful world you are experiencing.  I know every second is consumed by the pain the scary thoughts.  This is what everyone goes through tapering and getting off these drugs.  YOU WILL have your life back again.  I know it all seems impossible that can be real, but it is true Coop, it does happen.  The first phase, the most important, and you are almost there, is getting off the drug. Then, he next phase is going through the wds to healing.  Its not easy, but Coop, you will and can get there.  Like so many others have, myself included.  My hubby had a two day window, finally felt like he was new again, then it shut, back to the pain.  Its a process of healing, everyone does get there.  The key, is staying off the drug, once you are off it, and I know you will.  The second, is finding some coping skills through the healing phase.  Right now that too much for you to think about. as I know you are using every coping skill (automatic pilot) you have to deal and go through what you are going through.  Just know, eventually it will get better.I know you don't have any idea how it can, but it does.  Please, just try to read what I write about it, as the other bbs do who have healed.  It truly does happen.  You will have your life back.  Love to you Coop... Hugs, Pattylu

[[so...]]

Sorry to hear about your pain...I really am.  I too suffer from unexplainable joint/muscle pain, both feet go numb, hands tingle and when I wake up in the morning I feel like 10 mIles of bad road.

 

It appears this type of suffering is common and something we must endure to reclaim our lives. With that said I have one question for you. Who is going to win? Will it be you or these pills?  How badly do you want your life back?  You have to want freedom more than this drug wants you. The good news is you have lots of people here ready and willing to help you with this figh.  make no mistake....thus is one demon that is hard to defeat but with the help of those on this site it can be done. You have to want it and this won't be easy but it certainly can be done.

 

I can't tell you how bad I feel right now at just over 5 mths off but I promise you I will win this fight.  I have to...my family is depending on me.  You can win this fight too if you want it bad enough.