obsessed over w/d stories

[[DD...]]

Yikes! I, too am getting a little too obsessed with the horror stories on some of these posts. I may stop reading for awhile and report back when I am successful. Is it possible that only those who have had awful w/d experiences are the ones who post?? I completely understand that this is a wonderful support for people who are taking control of their life but I think I need a break....

[[...]]

Not everyone has a horrific withdrawal experience.  You're probably right that those who suffer tend to post here for support.  If you feel that reading some of these posts is negatively impacting your taper then there is nothing wrong with taking a break or just focusing on reading success stories.  Do what feels right to you in order to be successful.

Wishing you well on your journey to benzo freedom.

[[Ju...]]

You're right, it can get obsessive. The important thing to remember is that we are all individuals, and no two people will have the exact same experience. I often take breaks from the site, or only post to my progress log..or just read the more positive topics. I always return though, the sense of community and support is so valuable.

 

Hugs,

Julie

[Guest [Tu...]]

I freaked out at 4.5 months and reinstated for 5 weeks before resuming my c/t. Part of it had to do with pressure in my daily life, but also from reading stories from people who were still in horrible agony at 18 months or two years. I was actually feeling good, but those horror stories just really shook me up. I guess we all have to remember that we each recover differently...

 

Hang in there. It does get better.

 

Tucson

 

[[In...]]

DD,

 

Some of this stuff can get to you for sure. But if you're not having any of it, or are having slight w/d sx, reading it won't make any rough w/d happen to you.

 

Just keep on going slow with small cuts and that will help your w/d go more smoothly.

 

Intend

[[DD...]]

Thanks Intend....Good advice! Slow and steady wins the race!!

[Guest [Pf...]]

The board is probably not representative of people in withdrawal.

 

First, some people have no problem, or little problem, stopping and it doesn't even occur to them to go to the internet.  Think about it -- until you had some benzo problems, did you think you needed to find a message board.  So that group is probably little represented here.

 

Second, as people do better, they tend to drop off the board.  Not everyone.  Some who are doing great and are completely cured have been great to stick around and give encouragement.  To be honest, once I am 100%, I probably will not spend too much time here.  That doesn't mean that people do not check in and post.  But once benzos are no longer the center of your life, you are likely to move on to other things.

 

Third, when we are in distress, when tend to look for information that will give us guidance.  On one hand, we are looking for that hopeful informaiton.  On the other, when we see something that is negative that might apply to us, we are more likely to grab onto it if we are worried about that.

 

I'll give you an example of this third phenomenon with me.  I do have some history of heart disease -- a stent at 38 -- but for now all of my tests are great.  But I occassionally get panic attacks and with benzo withdrawal have started wo worry that I might drop dead of a heart attack.  When I start reading information about heart attack warning signs or hearing about someone who seemed healthy having a heart attack, I start to think "Oh, that must be me.  I was a bit tired running up the  stairs."  That is because I am already in the mindset to look for the negative, so when I see it, I am more likely to notice it.  There are not stories of people who did not die of heart attacks today.

 

Finally, I think there is another reason why benzo users who suffer withdrawal tend to really be afraid.  This problem came so unexpectedly.  Of all the things that I ever worried about in life, I never thought that I would have a problem with prescription drugs.  I never used any drugs, prescription or illegal, recreationally.  Nor did I ever use high doses.  So this was a shock to me.  So now I am extra wary about things that I migth have overlooked.  I am guessing that this is an aspect of PSTD -- super-vigilence and noticing negatives.

 

In short, while these boards are great, it is not alwasys helpful for every person to spend time on here at all times during recovery.

 

 

[[ma...]]

Hey,

 

Yes, it is very possible for this information to cause more anxiety than it relieves! I've taken time off this site because my experience is ultimately what it is - my own. I share many common problems with people here, but I also react differently to things. It is comforting to check in with others having the same sx just to know I'm not crazy. Today my tinnitus is a biotch. But I know it comes and goes and for most people it fades with time.

 

But the best thing about BB is this: it feels wonderful to help others. That is genuinely therapeutic and why we are all here. To help and be helped - not to scare or be scared.

 

-M

[[In...]]

I've had some really unusual problems that others have not had I think. When I first joined BB, it was specifically to help with a cross to klonopin. But the crosses are usually to Valium, so while others had successfully done it w/o much trouble, I could not do it.

 

It's been a horrible experience and I'm now totally back on Xanax, and having K w/d. There isn't a lot of answers to my problems here or anywhere from what I can tell and I've asked. So due to my anxiety, I spend some time here just searching, while I know the answers or similar experience isn't necessarily here.

 

But there are many supportive people here and there is much info I have gleaned. And my case truly demonstrates the total individuality of each person here and how each experience is unique. No ones experience necessarily predicts another ones.

 

Intend

[[ma...]]

Hi Intend,

 

Don't mean to hijack this thread for a med discussion but...

 

I crossed from K to V and boy are they different drugs. I was down to a fairly low dose of K and actually updosed with V until I felt stable. But still, I have to agree that KingKlon is a fierce med with it's own odd chemistry. I've tried to understand the "nitrobenzodiazepines" from the "classic" benzos but there is not much on the web about it.

 

Now that I'm crossed I guess I'm OK with it. Still having klon wd symptoms but they are attenuated somewhat. Perhaps that's all I can expect. I know some other K users who had rough times crossing over but are ultimately glad they did. I really wanted to taper straight of klon and perhaps I should have simply gone for it.

 

Here's my wish for Klon: the makers create a "taper pack" that has pills going from .25 to 0 in .025 increments. Color code them, make them big and easy to read and cut if necessary. I was going to jump from .125 and am glad I didn't actually.

 

Best to you,

 

M

[[pa...]]

I think reading success stories is helpful, PM'ing those who are positive or have healed is helpful, and reading too much into horror posts is NOT helpful.

 

I will be blunt: There are people on here who post with a topic title that is "scary" - and I wonder if they do this on purpose - and if they are like this in real life?!  Don't get me wrong, I am NOT saying that we shouldn't come here for support - but I much appreciate those who say "experiencing ___ - need support" rather than "terror" posts  - that seem to want to look on the negative side.  All of us is coping, but some posts are just inherently set on looking on the negative side of things - and I just skip those anymore, because they are the types of information I want to pattern my recovery after. (Again - this is not the same to me as those who need support for a rough time - that is completely expected and I respect that.)

 

What Pfeff said is sage advice. Each of our experiences is unique - and our recovery is unique. But the important point is that people improve over time, contine to improve, and then eventually heal. They have fogs lift, symptoms abate, vision improve, breathing improve, d/r goes away - all of it - it goes away. Nobody can know when -but try not to seek the negative - you'll always find it. This is the same advice I'm following myself - because regardless, we're going to get through it - and I want it to be in as positive a way as I can.

 

;)Parker

[[Sc...]]

I often became scared by reading posts during my taper.  I would often take a break for a day or two and that helped.  I also found the success stories VERY helpful.  I would read and reread them to get me through the toughest of times.  Many people who are off of benzos never came here b/c they were some of the fortunate people who do not experience intense w/d symptoms.  My mom took it for 25+ years and tapered off of her Clonazepam over 6 months.  She did really well!  She had symptoms but they were subtle.  Her worst symptoms were crying spells and vertigo.  She has since healed for the most part.  I'd say about 95%...her last dose was the end of October.  I am SO happy for her. 

 

W/d is different for each of us.  So just remember that.  You are on your OWN journey and it doesn't mean it will be as hard for you as it is for the next person.  You will heal and just try to focus on that. It's hard, b/c I've been there and I had many frustrating days, but I am getting there.  Most people are in this forum b/c they need the support.  Hundreds of others are out there enjoying life post-benzos.  We'll get there too!

 

All the best,

Schatje

[[pa...]]

Yes, they can be overwhelming.. Go to Success Stories, read each and everyone of them.  Then go to Chewing the Fat... these other areas might be more beneficial for you.  Pattylu

[[Bi...]]

Take a break if needed. I don't think it's healthy to stay on a forum 24/7 IMO. I think it's nice to have a place to go for reassurance.

 

Billy.

[[cn...]]

Take a break from the forum. I used to be the same way. It helped me personally in a huge way way. Some people need to be on here alot ... some of us should lay off for a bit if it's doing you harm. When you obsess over horror stories you are going to freak yourself out and and that's unnecessary.  I was scared out of my mind when I 1st came here 6 months ago and thought I'd be just as bad as all of these horror stories.  The truth is we are all different!  Im 4a months out out and am probably going to write a success story in the next couple of days.  God bless!

[[Ju...]]

Cnotr, I will be SO happy to read your success story!! 

[Guest [Tu...]]

Maintain:

I was hooked to Xanax from 1997 to 1999. I went to a doctor to cross over to something with a longer half life and then to taper and she put me on Klonopin. I agree about being very different, feeling-wise. I hated Klonopin. I went to Mexico (bringing drugs back was easy pre-9/11) and got a bunch of Valium and cut down on Xanax and increased the Valium over about a 4-week period and was just fine. Perhaps I was too fine, as I just did not want to get off Valium. It made me feel great.

 

I eventually did do a c/t from Valium back in September and did pretty good for 4.5 months, then I was so stressed out I reinstated -- but reinstated Xanax and not Valium. I don't care for how Xanax makes me feel, so it wasn't tough to decide to resume my c/t yesterday. I'm hurting real bad from the Xanax w/d right now, but I'll live.

 

Benzos are just poison! Yes, they help with anxiety and panic attacks, but the damage they do in the long run is even worse...

 

Tucson