Short Term Xanax Use and Taper

[[Mi...]]

My story is probably an old one and not at all original.  I was prescribed Xanax during a period of hyperthyroidism which causes extreme nervousness, anxiety, insomnia, weight loss, high blood pressure and more. I was very ill from the hyperthyroid symptoms and thought at the time that xanax was my only lifeline to feeling better. I would take a dose and feel so much better for a few hours until it wore off. My racing heart and thoughts subsided, I was able to relax and sleep and I could feel hopeful that regaining my health was a possibility. For a period of 2-3 months, I averaged 1.-1.5 mgm per day in doses of .5 mgm each. I did not know that the Xanax was a time bomb waiting to create a whole new set of problems worse in ways than the hyperthyroidism. When my hyperthyroidism became controlled, I naively thought that the Xanax was no longer needed. I did not know it was addicting and my 3 different doctors (primary care doc, endocrinologist and BP doc) all knew I was taking it but did not advise me of the risk of addiction or the dangers of trying to stop it cold turkey. They were of no help either when I voiced concerns and the desire to be off Xanax. Luckily I researched the topic first and found out that it could be addicting and decided to taper myself off on my own schedule. I ended up tapering by .25 every week for 6 weeks and then stopped it. I have been totally off it for 2 weeks now but my symptoms continue. Here were/are my symptoms.

 

BP spikes. Luckily I had a BP doctor and was already on BP med due to the thyroid issues.

 

Heart racing and skipping beats.

 

Heat intolerant. Overheated and became sweaty easily.

 

Nausea

 

Extreme dizziness and lack of balance. Oddly enough affected by light level. When I go from a lighted area to a darker area, the dizziness increases.

 

Irritability

 

Emotionally labile, weep at the drop of a hat. Lack of any joy in life. Feeling flat and numb.

 

Brain fog. Tasks requiring clear thinking such as paying bills are difficult. Make many errors.

 

Weird unreal feelings. I do not hallucinate or become disoriented but often people and objects seem distorted kind of like a Matisse painting.

 

Extreme sensitivity to sound. A ringing phone or music at normal level send me into orbit. Startle easily.

 

 

I guess what I am trying to point out that I was not on a very high daily dose and used it for a relatively short time during a medical illness, but became addicted and the withdrawal is worse than and lasting longer than the original illness it was prescribed for. This highlights the insidious nature of benzos. I would like to say that my symptoms have gotten better as my dose was reduced and stopped but they haven't. They are as bad or worse than ever. I am barely functional around my house and don't dare drive or put myself in any situations which require clear thinking and/or brisk motor skills. Although I do have some days when I feel better and more hopeful and others when I feel despair at what seems a never ending black tunnel. I do have hope that I will feel better over time. I wish I could go back and unmake the decision to take Xanax in the first place. I will never take it again. Although it was prescribed for a medical condition, I now think that I would have been better off just toughing it out instead of having to go through withdrawals. Any of you out there if you are in the early days of using Xanax, or are thinking of using it as prescribed, please use extreme caution and think long and hard about whether the benefits will outweigh the potential for addiction and its aftermath.

 

I an sorry I have to be a member of this community but glad that it exists to give us all hope and encouragement that there is indeed life after benzos.

[[St...]]

Hi MiniMinnie, welcome to BenzoBuddies

 

It's not uncommon to still feel so bad after coming off, the symptoms you list are very common but they do lift after awhile. I'm glad you found us, I think you'll find a lot of support and understanding here, you're not alone.

 

Welcome aboard

 

Star

[Guest [...]]

Hey MiniMinnie

 

just stumbled across your post and want to say you know what in my opinion most doctors suck.  They dont care about what they are giving us think yourself lucky.  I was given 4mg of xanax a day by some idiot.  Then they found out after months of me crying that i was having an adverse effect from it der.  No one told me it was addictive and the shrink said i could give a go at going of it cold turkey.  Well as you can imagine all hell broke loose.  Spent 7 weeks in hospital thanks to them.  I crossed over to valium and came down to 2. in 18 days now ive just dropped to 2mg and im nearly free of this crap.  You will start to feel better I am feeling amazing now and you will to just give it time.  Stop trying to fight the symptoms you will only feel worse.  There is light at the end of the tunnel.

 

Lizzy

 

[[Mi...]]

Lizzie, thank you for your support and insight.  No, doctors do not have a clue!  The BP doc is/was only concerned about my BP, the endo didn't want to hear about anything but my thyroid lab values and my GP who rx'd Xanax was just clueless.  I appreciate that you've been there and done that and thankfully survived.  I know things will get better and it really helps to hear you say so too. 

[Guest [...]]

Hey there Mini

 

No worries Im happy to give you worlds of encouragement.  I so needed it.  My reduction in hospital was so radical swapped over to 45mg of valium and got down to 2.5 in 18 days omg thought I was going to die.  Now with this .5 reduction im starting to get a little anxiety but I know it will go away.  Im just trying to acknowledge it for what it is unpleasant symptoms which can only cause distress if you run with them.  Acknowledge them for what they are it really works.  Talk about blood pressure thats what my undoing was i took a blood pressure medication which triggered my ocd then low and behold the doctors started shoving medication down my throat and i stupidly took it.  Never ever again will I take a med that affects the brain.  Im currently going to write a letter of complaint towards the dr that prescribed me 2mg of valium morning and night and to let him know that we are people real people not their little science experiments.  We should be provided with appropriate information before we are given these substances.  We should be informed of possible side effects and if they are addictive and if they are how long can we take them before we are addicted not just leave us on and see what happens.  Perhaps they should take them and withdraw so they can see how screwed these drugs make u.  However at the end of the day we do recover and thats why im sharing this info with you in the hope that you know deep in your heart you will recover.  Remember the saying Time heals all wounds and thats what it takes time thats all.  Anyway excuse me im off to pop another useless pill bring on 8 weeks time when I never have to take these stupid things every again.

 

 

Lizzy

[[Mi...]]

Lizzie, I am just now learning to go with my symptoms!  As uncomfortable as they are, I am far enough down the road from my last dose of X that I know it won't kill me.  I had to laugh at your suggestion that all doctors should have to take benzos and go through withdrawals.  They wouldn't prescribe them so nonchalantly if their butts could feel what we feel!  Lets hang in there together.  We WILL be benzo free!

[Guest [...]]

Hey Minnie

 

I reduced on Wednesday another .5 and am starting to have a few withdrawal symptoms ie burning in the left lower leg very strange and some fear provoking anxiety which im just telling myself to go with lol very hard to do at times but we can do this.  I also start to feel strange at times cant use a word to describe it but just a little weird.  Anyway went to the beach today had a swim and let the waves sooth me.  We will get there

 

 

Lizzy

[[Mi...]]

Hi again Lizzie,

 

I have those weird dfeelings all the time.  Its the thing that bothers me the most.  I feel spacey and everything looks a bit off like at odd angles.  I noticed it the most in the first week off Xanax but now they are receding a bit.    Going to the beach, what fun.  A favorite activity for us too here in sunny Florida.  When I can't do that I find that a warm bath in dim light with my music playing helps a lot.  Hang in there, this too shall pass!  We can do this and get our life back better than before!

 

MiniMinnie

[[Mi...]]

Just had to share that FINALLY , after almost 3 weeks since my last Xanax dose, I have begun to experience those windows of feeling better.  I thought they were an urban myth!  Two days running I have had short periods of clear thinking, no dizziness and just overall improvement.  Today I have had a 3 hour window and still going.  YAY!  Hang in there Benzobuddies, life does get better!

 

MiniMinnie

[[Ch...]]

Oh, yay...glad to see this post from you since  I'm behind you by a couple of weeks and SO looking forward to a "window"!  Can't wait!!  You're keeping me going right now, Minnie...

[[Mi...]]

Hold on Challis, your windows won't be far behind!  Windows on the world - without xanax.  We can do this!

 

MiniMinnie

 

PS Glad you fond this site when you did as the other site removed my link right after you clicked on it.

[Guest [...]]

yay Minnie

 

That is awesome told you it would happen.  I unfortunately have taken the cut and 6 days on my windows have disappeared again however I know they will return again.  Keep up the good work.  I cant wait to get of this stuff.

 

Lizzy

 

PS Im in sunny Australia.  Notice your in Florida my ex husband is over I should get you to track him down and get all that child support he owes me lol.

[[Mi...]]

Yep Lizzy your windows will return and one day you will wake up and they'll be gone totally.  Isn't that an exciting thought?  I am so looking forward to that.

 

Tell you what.  I'll track down your ex if you'll track down mine!  Bet all the stuff we went thought with them might have a bearing on our present!

 

XOX

MiniMinnie

[Guest [...]]

ahahaha Minnie

 

Thats a deal.  You would never believe he took off when my baby was three months old and never saw him ever again until my son turned 18 and then he tried to befriend me on facebook can you believe it.  Anyway girlfriend let me tell you definately a source of our issues.  Amongst all the other crap that we have had to deal with in our lives.  I have been going to a group run through the private hospital i was in to taper down off from xanax to valium and its called ACT short for Acceptance Committment Therapy its about learning to live in the present not the past nor the future and accepting the bodily sensations for what they are.  Its all good in theory but they obviously havent gone through benzo withdrawal.  Im still trying to take on board the stuff Im learning and put it in place.  Had bad thoughts today about permanent damage any stuff that reacts with your mind may do but I know its only thoughts so will leave it at that.

 

Tomorrow is another day my new friend

 

chat soon

 

Lizzy xxx

 

[[Mi...]]

Yowser Lizzie!  Unfortunately I can do you one better.  My ex ran off when my daughter was 5 weeks old.  She tracked him down when she was 28!  But you are right we have to let the past go.  Easier said than done, thinking about all that can still get my blood pressure up.  But I do know one thing.  Being benzo free and dealing with stuff is waaaaay better than dealing with stuff and being on benzos.  I am sitting here in bed drinking my morning joe, the Florida sun is coming up outside my window and life seems to be full of possibilities in this moment.  Lets determine to hang in there ONE MORE DAY my friend.

 

XOXOX

MiniMinnie

[Guest [...]]

Hey Minnie

 

All dead beat dads anyway my son doesnt want anything to do with him and im sure your daughter was better off.  Glad you are having a nice morning.  Its morning here to however im waking up in bed with dreadful anxiety know its withdrawal because i didnt have it before.  Anyway thanks for your words needed to hear them today.  Yes friend another day to get through Im sure we will be fine.

 

 

Lizzyxxx

[[Mi...]]

Just getting up here.  One more day toward benzo freedom behind us!  I shared my struggles with a close friend in person yesterday and it felt so freeing.  This isn't something we can tell the world about and that is very isolating.  I am steadily feeling better each day.  But on another note, my hair is falling out left and right!  My hair is thin and fine at its best and now I am practically bald underneath on the sides.  This is so depressing!  As if the horrible physical symptoms weren't enough, this feels like kicking me when I'm down.  Anyway Lizzy,  lets mark another day off the calender and determine to face ONE MORE DAY.  We can do this!

 

XOXO

MiniMinnie

[Guest [...]]

Hey there Minnie

 

How r u going.  Great to see that you have shared with a friend it can be upllifting.  I however am struggling with the latest cut should not have cut .5 was to much.  Reread your initial post and saw that you cried often to.  What is that about.  Ever since I started xanax months ago and even though i crossed over to valium I seriously cry often and never did before.  So hate this stuff and what it has done to my life.  Hey sorry to hear about your hair that is unfair to say the least.  Hope it grows back im sure it will.  Anyway  Im off hopeflly tomorrow will be a better day

 

Lizzy xxx

 

[[Mi...]]

Hi Lizzy.  Yep, for a while there I cried about everything.  Something as simple as being unable to open one of those awful blister packs packs would set me off.  That's mostly gone now.  Emotionally lability goes along with all this miserable crap.  I am getting new symptoms every day, but thankfully they are not as bad as the really horrible ones.  Today I am itching like mad, which I have read is due to the benzo withdrawal.  .5 might have been too big of a cut for you.  I understand that you have to make the cuts even slower the closer to stopping you are.  Lets hang in another day, things WILL get better.

 

 

XOXOO

MiniMinnie

[[Ch...]]

I have to get into this conversation, Lizzie and Mini...too familiar in all respects, including ex-husbands! 

 

After a three day bout of increasing withdrawals w/o Xanax and thinking I'd have to go to the hospital the third night, I took .125 and got immediate relief from the worst of it.  For the last three days I've taken .125 in the morning and at night.  Now I wonder if I can go to .125 just once a day...anxious to get this done, and I'm not having any debilitating side effects. 

 

Mini, so glad you're doing better every day.  Lizzie, I've been where you are...hang in there!  You're on the right road and you'll get there.  .5 is definitely too much to taper at once... going .125 at a time seems to be what most people are doing to be successful without terrible side effects.

 

Challis

 

[[Mi...]]

Hi Challis,

 

Sorry you ran into the brick wall, but you did the right thing.  Sometimes we have to back up a bit in order to go forward in the right direction.  I was tempted in the beginning to take just a wee bit of X just for that short term relief, but toughed it out.  I probably should have gone from .25 to .125 in hindsight.  But, after the intital horrible symptoms, things seem to be getting better each day that I am benzo free and it will for you too, Challis and  Lizzy.  One day at a time!  We can do this. (she said as she scratched furiously in places that are socially unacceptable) 

 

MiniMinnie

 

 

[[Ch...]]

Hi Mini,

I tried so hard to tough it out, and was in extreme physical distress when I realized I had to either take a tiny bit (which is all it took to end the side effects that felt life-threatening) or seek medical intervention.  From reading the forums, medical intervention probably would have been counter-productive so I chose not to do that.  Another member wrote about the kindling effect of reinstating meds, but that appears to apply to people who have been off for weeks rather than days and hopefully doesn't apply to me. 

 

Right now, at .125 twice a day, I have room to tolerate side effects so I'm going to try .125 once a day instead of twice, but I'm going to hold for two weeks to make sure.  I have asked my doctor for a prescription of .25 tablets so I can break the halves into quarters and taper down to .06 after two weeks at .125.  Next time I WILL be successful!

Challis

P.S. Scary how many symptoms of withdrawal you've had for short term use...shows how powerful this drug is.

 

[[Mi...]]

Challis hang in there!  I know you will be successful.  You were right to avoid medical intervention as the medical community is CLUELESS about benzos. Go for those .25 mgm tabs.  All I had was 1 mgm tabs.  YES, my doctor started me right off the bat on 1 mgm to be taken up to 3x daily as needed.  Now, I am only 110 pounds so WTF!  How was that dose justified?  I was too sick to question it.  Anyway, when I went to taper, it was impossible to go lower than 1/4 tab, hence I jumped off at .25.  .125 would have been better.  And YES it is frightening how many symptoms I am dealing with in light of my relative low dose and relative short time on them!  Highlights the dangers and how strong they really are.  When will the medical community wake up and smell the Xanax?  LOL.

 

MiniMinnie

[[Ch...]]

Thank you, Mini...you're my hope and inspiration!!  I'll be following your progress but I think you're coming out of the deep woods into the clearing...

Challis

[[Au...]]

Hi Miniminnie,

 

Love the name BTW!

 

Just wanted to say I too was on benzos for a short time, at a low dose and had horrible horrible withdrawals.

I'm not 100% healed yet, but am getting better.

 

Glad to hear you are getting windows so soon! I would say that's a good sign!

 

Keep it up!