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Do we actually heal? Or do we just get better?


[Be...]

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Do we actually really heal and regain our full health back to100%? Or do we just get better and get used to the way our health is and we just become livable? I'm talking here about physical, mental and psychological health.

 

I feel like there is some sort of permanent damage here!

 

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[96...]

Indeed! No way to survive this.

 

Are you saying indeed we actually heal or indeed its permanent damage?  Because the OP is 4 years off and seemingly still in acute withdrawal.

 

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Does anyone ever heal 100% from any injury? There's always a scar, at least, or some stiffness, diminished range of motion, maybe a little ache when the weather changes. I doubt any injury ever heals 100%, and I doubt this one does. But for most, it heals enough. Just try to relax and let it happen.
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Does anyone ever heal 100% from any injury? There's always a scar, at least, and often more - some stiffness, diminished of range of motion, maybe a little ache when the weather changes. I doubt any injury ever heals 100%, and I doubt this one does. But for most, it heals enough. Just try to relax and let it happen.

 

I see some posts of people here in benzobuddies who talk about how they've healed 110% and that they are even better than before benzos.

 

Are they just lying to us to encourage us to keep going?!

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Does anyone ever heal 100% from any injury? There's always a scar, at least, and often more - some stiffness, diminished of range of motion, maybe a little ache when the weather changes. I doubt any injury ever heals 100%, and I doubt this one does. But for most, it heals enough. Just try to relax and let it happen.

 

Are you healed yet?!

 

And how healed are you? What percentage?

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Does anyone ever heal 100% from any injury? There's always a scar, at least, and often more - some stiffness, diminished of range of motion, maybe a little ache when the weather changes. I doubt any injury ever heals 100%, and I doubt this one does. But for most, it heals enough. Just try to relax and let it happen.

 

"Just try to relax and let it happen."

 

My main problem is: I can't seem to relax! If only I could.

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Are you healed yet?!

And how healed are you? What percentage?

 

I don't think I'm 100% healed. I'm not back where I was before benzos. I'm not sure I'll ever be 100% healed. But I'm a whole lot better than I was when I first came off clonazepam, that's for sure. There's no comparison. I would say I'm something like 95% healed. But you know, I can't drink alcohol without revving up my anxiety, and I can't handle stress as well as before benzos. My sleep is so much better than right after withdrawal, but it's still not as good as it was before benzos. So I guess I'll just keep living and keep hoping I keep healing. What else should I do? But I don't expect to come out of this without some reminder of the injury, some scar. I just don't expect that. If people want to expect that, I understand. But I think it's unrealistic and they're just setting themselves up for disappointment. I don't rule it out, but I'm not going to get all freaked out if it doesn't happen. I've healed a lot. I'm healed enough. I hope I keep healing, but who knows?

 

When I say relax and let it happen, I mean stop worrying about whether you'll heal 100%. Just take it day by day. Get a little better every day. I used to talk myself through every morning, through my Morning Madness, as I called it. I'd get up, get ready, get out the door and get to work - all while I was in a quasi-psychotic state. And I'd tell myself, OK, so you're still pretty messed up, but you're a little better today than you were yesterday. Just keep that in mind. You're a little better today, and tomorrow you'll be a little better than today. It never occurred to me to set a deadline for 100% healing. What's the point of that? One step at a time. Just keep moving in the right direction.

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[7e...]

I believe we heal :)

 

I feel like I am going insane, racing thoughts...intrusive memories, nerve burning, and anxiety...but it seems when I accept I am sick right now but am getting better I can calm myself a little bit.  I know it will be okay.

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Are you healed yet?!

And how healed are you? What percentage?

 

I don't think I'm 100% healed. I'm not back where I was before benzos. I'm not sure I'll ever be 100% healed. But I'm a whole lot better than I was when I first came off clonazepam, that's for sure. There's no comparison. I would say I'm something like 95% healed. But you know, I can't drink alcohol without revving up my anxiety, and I can't handle stress as well as before benzos. My sleep is so much better than right after withdrawal, but it's still not as good as it was before benzos. So I guess I'll just keep living and keep hoping I keep healing. What else should I do? But I don't expect to come out of this without some reminder of the injury, some scar. I just don't expect that. If people want to expect that, I understand. But I think it's unrealistic and they're just setting themselves up for disappointment. I don't rule it out, but I'm not going to get all freaked out if it doesn't happen. I've healed a lot. I'm healed enough. I hope I keep healing, but who knows?

 

When I say relax and let it happen, I mean stop worrying about whether you'll heal 100%. Just take it day by day. Get a little better every day. I used to talk myself through every morning, through my Morning Madness, as I called it. I'd get up, get ready, get out the door and get to work - all while I was in a quasi-psychotic state. And I'd tell myself, OK, so you're still pretty messed up, but you're a little better today than you were yesterday. Just keep that in mind. You're a little better today, and tomorrow you'll be a little better than today. It never occurred to me to set a deadline for 100% healing. What's the point of that? One step at a time. Just keep moving in the right direction.

 

Do you feel like your healing is still progressing (even if it is very slowly) Or do you feel that your healing has completely stopped?

 

You are 8 years off benzo, right? Do you feel that you are better now than when you were 4 years off benzo? Like you feel you still making progress every year or every couple of years?!!

 

For me, I made a huge progress by the end of the first year off benzos, and I thought I would be completely healed by the 2 years mark, I was super excited! Then it's like my healing has stopped right there! No more progress! Now that I'm 4 years 3 months off, I feel as though I've became worse in some aspects and have even developed some new symptoms!

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Are you healed yet?!

And how healed are you? What percentage?

 

I don't think I'm 100% healed. I'm not back where I was before benzos. I'm not sure I'll ever be 100% healed. But I'm a whole lot better than I was when I first came off clonazepam, that's for sure. There's no comparison. I would say I'm something like 95% healed. But you know, I can't drink alcohol without revving up my anxiety, and I can't handle stress as well as before benzos. My sleep is so much better than right after withdrawal, but it's still not as good as it was before benzos. So I guess I'll just keep living and keep hoping I keep healing. What else should I do? But I don't expect to come out of this without some reminder of the injury, some scar. I just don't expect that. If people want to expect that, I understand. But I think it's unrealistic and they're just setting themselves up for disappointment. I don't rule it out, but I'm not going to get all freaked out if it doesn't happen. I've healed a lot. I'm healed enough. I hope I keep healing, but who knows?

 

When I say relax and let it happen, I mean stop worrying about whether you'll heal 100%. Just take it day by day. Get a little better every day. I used to talk myself through every morning, through my Morning Madness, as I called it. I'd get up, get ready, get out the door and get to work - all while I was in a quasi-psychotic state. And I'd tell myself, OK, so you're still pretty messed up, but you're a little better today than you were yesterday. Just keep that in mind. You're a little better today, and tomorrow you'll be a little better than today. It never occurred to me to set a deadline for 100% healing. What's the point of that? One step at a time. Just keep moving in the right direction.

 

Redevan, this is one of the most positive, clear-eyed, resilient statements I've seen about benzo recovery.  I like it a lot.  Day by day, savoring the small improvements, keeping hope that it will keep getting better.  "What else should I do," indeed? Thanks for this.

 

Haimona

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Do you feel like your healing is still progressing (even if it is very slowly) Or do you feel that your healing has completely stopped?

 

I think my healing's still progressing, slowly. I am better than four years ago. My memory's better, for sure. My sleep's better. Physical symptoms have improved - skin problems especially. But the healing's slowed down a lot, compared to the first year or two. Some symptoms return from time to time, but I think that has to do with drinking alcohol or taking on too much stress. I like to think I can have a drink now and then with friends, but guess what - not! Not any. Not yet. I liken my healing brain to a healing shin bone, where I have wear a walking cast. Some stress helps it heal, but too much just breaks it again. For benzo recovery, it helps the healing to get out and live - but too much too fast and the symptoms flare up again. I don't know how long that will go on. Maybe some day I'll be okay with a few brews. Maybe never. Well, at least I don't have to worry about those DUI roadblocks, right? So I take it slow and stay alert to how I'm feeling, but at the same time try not to obsess about it - which is doubly difficult when obsessing is actually one of my few remaining symptoms, though that's improving too. So hang in there, buddy. You'll improve. Just stay away from the booze and the news and the MSG, and go easy on the chocolate and the coffee. Keep living, keep making plans, keep working if you can, and don't let yourself wallow in your worries. When that starts, change the subject. Focus on something else.

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Do you feel like your healing is still progressing (even if it is very slowly) Or do you feel that your healing has completely stopped?

 

I think my healing's still progressing, slowly. I am better than four years ago. My memory's better, for sure. My sleep's better. Physical symptoms have improved - skin problems especially. But the healing's slowed down a lot, compared to the first year or two. Some symptoms return from time to time, but I think that has to do with drinking alcohol or taking on too much stress. I like to think I can have a drink now and then with friends, but guess what - not! Not any. Not yet. I liken of my healing brain to a healing shin bone, where I have wear a walking cast. Some stress helps it heal, but too much just breaks it again. For benzo recovery, it helps the healing to get out and live - but too much too fast and the symptoms flare up again. I don't know how long that will go on. Maybe some day I'll be okay with a few brews. Maybe never. Well, at least I don't have to worry about those DUI roadblocks, right? So I take it slow and stay alert to how I'm feeling, but at the same time try not to obsess about it - which is doubly difficult when obsessing is actually one of my few remaining symptoms, though that's improving too. So hang in there, buddy. You'll improve. Just stay away from the booze and the news and the MSG, and go easy on the chocolate and the coffee. Keep living, keep making plans, keep working if you can, and don't let yourself wallow in your worries. When that starts, change the subject. Focus on something else.

 

Very beneficial words of wisdom. Thanks.

Wish you a speedy recovery and 100% healing!

:)

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Indeed! No way to survive this.

 

Are you saying indeed we actually heal or indeed its permanent damage?  Because the OP is 4 years off and seemingly still in acute withdrawal.

 

I am saying that of someone is saying you get used to it and learn to live with it then they are in a very different situation to me.

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Do we actually really heal and regain our full health back to100%? Or do we just get better and get used to the way our health is and we just become livable? I'm talking here about physical, mental and psychological health.

 

I feel like there is some sort of permanent damage here!

 

My experience is we heal in the sense that the perceivable WD symptoms like head pressure, headaches, anxiety, and every other really unpleasant symptom does go away in time.

 

We are forever changed, however, with respect to our unusual sensitivity - an allergy of sorts - to benzodiazepines. This is the exact same phenomenon alcoholics experience with respect to alcoholic. We can never again use benzodiazepines "safely". Even a single use can re-spawn the vast array of horrible withdrawals that took us months or sometimes years of constant use to develop. I know this because I'm both a sober alcoholic (coming up on 8 years) as well as someone who developed a dependence to benzos, healed, used again, and is now suffering again.

 

I would caution anyone serious about healing to avoid alcohol as well. The mechanism of action as I understand it is identical to benzos.

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I'd settle for just getting better at this point. I can live with most of what I feel now. I said I'd feel healed when my brain stops shaking. That hasn't happened yet. This symptom is the most bothersome of all.
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Does anyone ever heal 100% from any injury? There's always a scar, at least, and often more - some stiffness, diminished of range of motion, maybe a little ache when the weather changes. I doubt any injury ever heals 100%, and I doubt this one does. But for most, it heals enough. Just try to relax and let it happen.

 

"Just try to relax and let it happen."

 

My main problem is: I can't seem to relax! If only I could.

 

Your profile states you have taken many different drugs including heavy hitters like antipsychotics and amphetamine derivatives. I think it's hard to disentangle what is causing your remaining symptoms.

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Redevan: Such wisdom  - thank you. Basically mindset is so much of this. How we approach our healing can either help or hinder us. Its true to life in general. I like the analogy of some stress helping healing and too much can be damaging. I try to stretch myself a little on good patches, but have learned ( the hard way) to listen to my body, and when I have rough patches to dial things back a bit.

 

Maugham: You are right about taking into consideration various meds. i know myself I cannot say my symptoms are entirely benzos bc I have had the polydrugging as well. So I am healing from psyche meds in general.  But I do know what has improved significantly from stopping benzos as I had stopped AD's prior to benzos.

 

 

Sigh..does it really matter what is causing what lol? All I know is I am seeing the healing even if it is slower than I want. I am choosing to live the best I can with what I am given. Yes there are days where I grieve my "losses", but then I take a deep breath and choose forward progression.

 

Its like falling into a muddy pit. I can't stay there. I pull myself out. As I walk I feel weighed down and limited by the mud. But eventually it dries, cracks and falls off. Or a rain shower comes and rinses some away. Eventually I'll be walking more briskly and there may be a little dust on me. But I am free from the pit:)

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Redevan: Such wisdom  - thank you. Basically mindset is so much of this. How we approach our healing can either help or hinder us. Its true to life in general. I like the analogy of some stress helping healing and too much can be damaging. I try to stretch myself a little on good patches, but have learned ( the hard way) to listen to my body, and when I have rough patches to dial things back a bit.

 

Maugham: You are right about taking into consideration various meds. i know myself I cannot say my symptoms are entirely benzos bc I have had the polydrugging as well. So I am healing from psyche meds in general.  But I do know what has improved significantly from stopping benzos as I had stopped AD's prior to benzos.

 

 

Sigh..does it really matter what is causing what lol? All I know is I am seeing the healing even if it is slower than I want. I am choosing to live the best I can with what I am given. Yes there are days where I grieve my "losses", but then I take a deep breath and choose forward progression.

 

"Its like falling into a muddy pit. I can't stay there. I pull myself out. As I walk I feel weighed down and limited by the mud. But eventually it dries, cracks and falls off. Or a rain shower comes and rinses some away. Eventually I'll be walking more briskly and there may be a little dust on me. But I am free from the pit:)"

Very good analogy, I felt the same way, and thankfully I got through the muck.💖 Peace and Healing. :smitten:
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