Clonazepam w/d

[[be...]]

Hello.  I have depression (25 years) and anxiety (7 years) and I was prescribed clonazepam by my MD in 2013.  I actually went off cold turkey last June and for the first 4 days, everything was fine.  Then the fifth day, BAM!  Pulse & BP shot up as did anxiety, panic and crazy feeling.

 

I took up to 0.5mg 3x per day.  I am now on 0.25mg 3x per day.  I am now planning to taper but started taking antidepressant (trintellix) just over a week ago to help with withdrawal symptoms, or so I'm told.  I feel panic, anxious, depressed, crazy at times.  Very unnerving.  Very hard to hold it together.

 

It's a vicious cycle:  I feel anxious/depressed/crazy and I cope as best I can, but kids notice.  And they worry about me.  My spouse doesn't really know how to help me.  We haven't any friends who can help me or my kids through this.  I am finding it really hard, it impacts my kids & spouse, so on top of w/d symptoms, I feel incredibly guilty.  It is really difficult to find support. 

 

I am seeing a therapist who has helped me create a plan with support of my psychiatrist and MD.  But, I would really like to go to an inpatient facility where I can just be me feeling how I want to feel without my children as witnesses and potentially damaged from this mess.  I just feel so guilty.  Yet, I also just want to be on my own until this is done.

 

I am here seeking likes who are going thru same as me and seeking hope.  I feel like this is an unfixable mistake at times and am very frightened this will be my life and my kids' life.  Therapy forever.  Thanks for reading.

 

 

 

 

[[Pa...]]

Hello benzosmetoo, Welcome to BenzoBuddies!

 

This is not unfixable, you can do this with our help, thousands of people have gone before you paving the way for you.  I can see you're filled with guilt and worried about your family, this will be difficult but when you've recovered from this, when they have a whole mom and wife who is present in their lives, you and they will be glad you did this.

 

I would advise against going inpatient, detox facilities tend to rip people off of the drug too quickly, they then discharge them leaving them at the mercy of a basic cold turkey withdrawal and very painful process.  Most reinstate at that point and do a slow taper on their own.

 

Please take a look at our  Planning Your Withdrawal (Taper Plans) board to see the methods we support and when you're ready, check out our Withdrawal Support (during your taper) board to get support for your symptoms.

 

I'm glad you're getting an A/D on board, but I'd wait until you've settled in with that before beginning your taper. 

 

Please let us know how we can help and we're glad you're here.

 

Pamster

 

 

 

[[be...]]

Thank you.  I need support.  I am not sure what is going on in my brain, what's withdrawal, what's me.  I'm scared that this will be the way I am.  I have been like this since November and feel like I'm becoming less.  How do you do it on your own?  Those times when you wake up and are in misery?

 

I get overwhelmed with anxiety just making my kids' lunch or trying to figure out dinner.  I just want to flee being me.

[[Pa...]]

When in doubt, blame it on withdrawal because it is your brain.  The drug has caused your brain to make changes to its normal function, it has actually adapted to the presence of the drug, how scary is that?  When you take the drug away or become tolerant to it's effects, the brain has to rebuild the structures in had in place before it adapted itself and this takes time.  The pathways it used to send messages to almost every part of your body have been changed, this drug is that powerful.

 

I know you feel alone and scared, but look around the forum and seek out others who know exactly what you're feeling, you can do this with our help.  I'd like you to read this post, it helped me understand what happens to our brains because of this drug, I hope it helps you too.  What is happening in your brain