Need support Z c/t

[[Ia...]]

Temazapam+remeron 15mg for 9 months followed by Ambien+ 7.5 remeron for 1 year.

Currently on Trazadone at aout 40mg...and finished a one week on K low dose. Stopped because I knew where things were going. C/T Ambien about ten days ago because it had stopped working.

Getting no or micro sleep, no sure. Lots of muscle pain. Feel strangely normal during the day. Doctors pushing remeron back on me. Today was diagnosed with PCOS. Not sure what to make of anything. Fighting my psych tooth and nail to not go back on remeron.

 

Any support is so very appricated. All these docs want to do is drug me further. Trying not so scare myself that I am going to die from following my intuition.

 

Was always a light sleeper, but before 2018 only had 1 phase of heavy insomnia. Made it through drug free.

 

Had ambien and xanax  (tapered no problems) when a boyfriend died in 2012, which lead me to think I would get off easy when I started having trouble again in 2018. Didnt go down that way. Here I am.

[[Pa...]]

Hello Iamwell2019, Welcome to BenzoBuddies!

 

I like the name you've chosen, it sounds like you're determined to live up to it.  I'm so sorry to hear you're dealing with insomnia, it makes the nights so long, and the days are miserable.  We can offer you support, that's what we're here for, so please feel free to look around and ask questions if you have them.

 

Many of us thought it would be a relatively easy process to get off the drug a second time because we didn't have a problem the first but that isn't always the case, as you've discovered, so you're not alone there.  Please don't be scared, our members have a lot of experience with this process and they'll be happy to share what they're learned to help you through this.

 

Do I understand you correctly, you're not currently on Ambien, Temazepam or any other benzo?  I just wanted to be able to steer you to the board which would be the most helpful.  You might try the Post-withdrawal Recovery Support if that's the case.  But wherever you are in your withdrawal, I'm sure you'll find what you need here.

 

Again, welcome,

 

Pamster

[[Ia...]]

I cold turkey Ambien 10 mg after about a year of use about ten or so days ago because it had become completely ineffective for almost two months. I was given Klonopin about 14 days ago and told to take as needed with the Ambien. I fast tapered it today which was my first day with none. I only went up to about .75 at first. It did bring the fear down. (being tested for lymes by a naturalpath, doing some neurofeedback as well, counciled on natural supplements)

I was also given Trazadone about 2 weeks or so ago, which is ineffective but I am scared to cold turkey it so I have been holding at about 37mg a night.

 

I feel that I am getting no sleep. Yet currently during the day I function, can smile a bit, working a very minimal job, but consumed by whats going on.

 

Consumed by the no sleep part. Night isnt fun and it felt like my body wanted to drift today right at 9am (when I needed to get up for doctors appointments)e

 

My psych whom I am keeping in touch with so I atleast have contact with a doctor wants me to go back on Remeron which I had FIRST from jan 2018-aug 2018, it worked to help me sleep, but I eventually wanted off because of weight gain and feeling lethargic. I picked up the remeron and each night I dont know what to do anymore. I try benedryl and ordered some high quality CBD.. I am desparate to get even one or two hours just so I feel human. My family doesnt understand. Mother says get off everything father says I need to be medicated to function. Feel numb and teary. I need any help I can get. Just to get ONE hour would make me feel like ok? I don't know how long I can keep it up (with my work commitment 5 days a week, part time. I am eating well, but not exercising (which I did vigoriously for over 14 years and taught it which makes me so much more upset) They have tried to get me on cybalta, seroquel as well which I did maybe 3 days of sero and 7 of cymbalta and then said no. I just wanta tiny bit of rest. please help me.

 

This all began when I had insomnia in early 2018 and accepted temazapam and remeron so I could finish college. Now I dont even have a real job and feel horrible about myself. I am taking it one minute at a time. I live with people who seem to semi supportive but they too dont understand whats happened to me.

[[re...]]

I cold turkey Ambien 10 mg after about a year of use about ten or so days ago because it had become completely ineffective for almost two months. I was given Klonopin about 14 days ago and told to take as needed with the Ambien. I fast tapered it today which was my first day with none. I only went up to about .75 at first. It did bring the fear down. (being tested for lymes by a naturalpath, doing some neurofeedback as well, counciled on natural supplements)

I was also given Trazadone about 2 weeks or so ago, which is ineffective but I am scared to cold turkey it so I have been holding at about 37mg a night.

 

I feel that I am getting no sleep. Yet currently during the day I function, can smile a bit, working a very minimal job, but consumed by whats going on.

 

Consumed by the no sleep part. Night isnt fun and it felt like my body wanted to drift today right at 9am (when I needed to get up for doctors appointments)e

 

My psych whom I am keeping in touch with so I atleast have contact with a doctor wants me to go back on Remeron which I had FIRST from jan 2018-aug 2018, it worked to help me sleep, but I eventually wanted off because of weight gain and feeling lethargic. I picked up the remeron and each night I dont know what to do anymore. I try benedryl and ordered some high quality CBD.. I am desparate to get even one or two hours just so I feel human. My family doesnt understand. Mother says get off everything father says I need to be medicated to function. Feel numb and teary. I need any help I can get. Just to get ONE hour would make me feel like ok? I don't know how long I can keep it up (with my work commitment 5 days a week, part time. I am eating well, but not exercising (which I did vigoriously for over 14 years and taught it which makes me so much more upset) They have tried to get me on cybalta, seroquel as well which I did maybe 3 days of sero and 7 of cymbalta and then said no. I just wanta tiny bit of rest. please help me.

 

This all began when I had insomnia in early 2018 and accepted temazapam and remeron so I could finish college. Now I dont even have a real job and feel horrible about myself. I am taking it one minute at a time. I live with people who seem to semi supportive but they too dont understand whats happened to me.

 

I am so so sorry that you are having sleep issues. I have had bad sleep pretty much all my life. When I was addicted to benzos it made things much worst while I was on it and then I tapered off it and still had no sleep literally for a long time. I tried everything under the sun to get some sleep. Fixing my bed in a certain way, trying light music, having lettuce or a glass of milk. I tried it all. I would have sessions of 24-48+ hours with no sleep and it had impacted my life real bad. I really feel your pain and I am sorry that you are going through this.  Time and healing is what helped me, supplements did not help much, I just stuck it out and tried to have faith in myself.  It's hard having faith when you cannot sleep and your limbs are almost numb all day. I remember my journey quite well and I wish you lots of love and recovery!

[[Pa...]]

Hi Iamwell,

 

I did a cold turkey off of Ambien too, I was stupid and started taking it a few months after my cold turkey of Klonopin.  I knew better, I'd read the Ashton manual by then but rationalized, justified and excused my way out of the warning bells going off in my head!  Anyway, I know how you're feeling, you get so desperate for sleep, and angry too, the middle of the night is a terrible place when everyone is asleep and you're' not, I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.

 

You might try the Insomnia board, but really, your best bet is time, that seems to be our worst enemy and our best friend.  I took the easy way out, or so I thought when I started taking the Klonopin and the Ambien, but in the long run, I did myself a terrible disservice and paid a very high price.  I have hope you'll get past this and sleep will again find you, if you can't find hope, use some of mine.

 

Pamster