Jump to content
Please Check, and if Necessary, Update Your BB Account Email Address as a Matter of Urgency ×
New Forum: Celebrating 20 Years of Support - Everyone is Invited! ×
  • Please Donate

    Donate with PayPal button

    For nearly 20 years, BenzoBuddies has assisted thousands of people through benzodiazepine withdrawal. Help us reach and support more people in need. More about donations here.

Help please! I need advices, my thoughts are killing me, I'm scared.


[7a...]

Recommended Posts

[7a...]
I have thoughts of harming myself, thoughts that others would like to harm me, I even think that my mother wanna do bad things to me, Im scared of myself, I have thoughts of harming other people, I know I wouldn't do it, but I feel like I'm going crazy, I can't stand that pressure anymore, I'm 20 days after my CT, I always start having a panic attacks when I have those thoughts. What to do? I don't want to go to the hospital because they will give me more meds and I don't want more meds or they will put me back in benzos. Advices please people!
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Do you have a therapist? Is there something that you can do to distract and redirect your thoughts?  What have you tried? What has worked? What hasn't worked. I assure you, you are not going crazy. I have the weirdest, intrusive, fear-mongering thoughts that have lead me to believe that I am crazy, too. But I am not. Neither are you. It's the absence of the drug, leaving your brain and your whole CNS like a snail without it's shell. No one knows exactly why these drugs can cause mental and psychological symptoms like they do. If going to the hospital is not an option, make sure you have someone with you that you trust. Don't trust your thoughts right now because your brain is lying to you. You are not insane. You are in fear. And fear produces fear. What you are experiencing, as real as it may seem, is just fear...not a fact. People that are legitimately crazy, don't know they are. See if you can separate your mind from your brain. Your mind can tell you who you are, where you are, what day it is, and that you are mentally sound. Your brain is injured and is misfiring as it tried to right itself and heal. You are not alone.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

The period I had these self harm thoughts, I tried to stay at home the bare minimum. I went out to walk, to the mall to walk, met people I hadn't met for ages. I met them at their home or in mine, not stressful environments. If I didn't have anyone to meet one day I went to church and to the mall to see people. It was hell but at least seeing people kept me grounded and distracted me from my bad thoughts. Also watching videos of the girl Benzo warrior on YouTube. She's been through hell and she gives GREAT advice.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi aku,

 

Thoughts like the ones you’re describing are often called ‘intrusive thoughts’, ones that we normally wouldn’t have.  They are frightening, I know, and they can happen often during the withdrawal and recovery process.

 

Thoughts like this must be taken seriously so that you are safe, so let me give you this link to outside, real world help as this forum, like all online forums, isn’t equipped to handle them: Suicide, Self-harm & Threatening Behavior     

 

I urge you to call for outside help if you need it.  This is one subject we ask our members not to post to as it is one that is upsetting to others as well as being one we aren’t equipped to deal with here.

 

Take care, things will get better.

 

Challis  :smitten:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[7a...]

Do you have a therapist? Is there something that you can do to distract and redirect your thoughts?  What have you tried? What has worked? What hasn't worked. I assure you, you are not going crazy. I have the weirdest, intrusive, fear-mongering thoughts that have lead me to believe that I am crazy, too. But I am not. Neither are you. It's the absence of the drug, leaving your brain and your whole CNS like a snail without it's shell. No one knows exactly why these drugs can cause mental and psychological symptoms like they do. If going to the hospital is not an option, make sure you have someone with you that you trust. Don't trust your thoughts right now because your brain is lying to you. You are not insane. You are in fear. And fear produces fear. What you are experiencing, as real as it may seem, is just fear...not a fact. People that are legitimately crazy, don't know they are. See if you can separate your mind from your brain. Your mind can tell you who you are, where you are, what day it is, and that you are mentally sound. Your brain is injured and is misfiring as it tried to right itself and heal. You are not alone.

 

Thank u, it's a little bit better now but they are still intrusive and I'm on 2x50mg of Sulpiride and it is helping being more positive but when it comes to intrusive thoughts there is nothing that can help, I don't want to go to the hospital because I was on a detox one week ago and they wanted me on more meds they said that this is not withdrawal anymore and I need meds, I refused them and went back home. Im just scared because it's like someone would be talking in my head. So crazy. One day they are here and the other day they dissapear. I have my mum and my dad at home and I wouldn't harm myself, but those thoughts are just frightening.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[7a...]

The period I had these self harm thoughts, I tried to stay at home the bare minimum. I went out to walk, to the mall to walk, met people I hadn't met for ages. I met them at their home or in mine, not stressful environments. If I didn't have anyone to meet one day I went to church and to the mall to see people. It was hell but at least seeing people kept me grounded and distracted me from my bad thoughts. Also watching videos of the girl Benzo warrior on YouTube. She's been through hell and she gives GREAT advice.

 

OMG they are so bad, and sometimes I really start thinking is this the real me or this is withdrawal? everything feels so real, every thought, every memory, every dream, anxiety doesn't feel like anxiety but it feels so real, fear feels so real. So hard to deal with this I hope in the future I will forget everything that is happening in my head right now. :sick:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Please go on YouTube and search "blooming in wellness". That's Baylissas channel. Watch her videos. She's saving many people. She'll help you understand.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I had these thoughts, too. I even thought my boyfriend was trying to poison me one day.... and I had urges to slap him. I'm extremely non-violent. I've never been in a fight my entire life.... so this was terrifying for me. And my boyfriend is amazing and helpful.... so I have no idea how my mind worried about that.  It will pass, I swear. I'm on day 73 today and those thoughts are gone. It's so scary what withdrawal can make us think. I'm so sorry you're going through this.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I had these thoughts, too. I even thought my boyfriend was trying to poison me one day.... and I had urges to slap him. I'm extremely non-violent. I've never been in a fight my entire life.... so this was terrifying for me. And my boyfriend is amazing and helpful.... so I have no idea how my mind worried about that.  It will pass, I swear. I'm on day 73 today and those thoughts are gone. It's so scary what withdrawal can make us think. I'm so sorry you're going through this.

 

Alibuttons you're amazing the way you're holding up. Strong girl!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I had these thoughts, too. I even thought my boyfriend was trying to poison me one day.... and I had urges to slap him. I'm extremely non-violent. I've never been in a fight my entire life.... so this was terrifying for me. And my boyfriend is amazing and helpful.... so I have no idea how my mind worried about that.  It will pass, I swear. I'm on day 73 today and those thoughts are gone. It's so scary what withdrawal can make us think. I'm so sorry you're going through this.

 

Alibuttons you're amazing the way you're holding up. Strong girl!

 

Thank you so much. It's been the hardest/ scariest year of my life. I force myself to get out of my house (I can't always do it, though). I started daily group therapy last week and make myself go. I can finally see the healing happening. My boyfriend told me last night that I'm doing so much better. I was begging him every single day to take me to the ER. I haven't asked to go in about 10 days. That's huge for me.  ::)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Who's Online (See full list)

    • [fr...]
    • [...]
    • [st...]
    • [ne...]
    • [ro...]
    • [...]
    • [...]
    • [Ki...]
    • [Ro...]
    • [in...]
    • [Jo...]
    • [Ga...]
    • [Co...]
    • [Po...]
    • [ca...]
    • [...]
    • [Lo...]
    • [or...]
    • [Do...]
    • [kn...]
    • [Gr...]
    • [Ch...]
    • [Re...]
    • [El...]
    • [...]
    • [JA...]
    • [de...]
    • [Av...]
    • [4L...]
    • [WW...]
    • [El...]
    • [Tr...]
    • [di...]
×
×
  • Create New...