Dont want to give up

[[He...]]

I had a somewhat better day. Mostly have been dealing with vertigo . Well now the shakes have returned.  Havent had those in a week. I dont want to give in and start my med again. I've made it a week. Has anyone noticed a difference in symptoms going in to week 2??? Please anyone.  I'm having a rough time

[Guest [...]]

Ah, we have the same jump date. I was on it for many years, though.  The first few days went ok surprisingly, then day 6-9 so far has been more severe symptoms. I read it could take up to 2 weeks for severe withdrawal symptoms to ease so here's hoping. Hang in there

[[He...]]

Hello! Thank you.  Going in to week two! I do feel some better. The first 8 days were horrible . Praying we both find relief. 

[[Ma...]]

Ah, don't give up! Symptoms are probably going to be wide and varied. Mine were/are. The only things I can think of that were pretty consistent was the brain fog, the muscle tension and pain. I'm still having a lot of muscle tension and pain, but nothing I can't live with. Friday sucked a big bag of marbles, but I know what caused it, and will try to avoid letting myself get stressed too much from here on out.

 

Honestly, life is going to suck for you for a little while. I knew this going in. I didn't realize how long of a while, but nobody finds out until you're there. There's another guy on BB that says he was mostly healed after 6 weeks. There's a lot of people not on this site that didn't have much in the way of WD sxs, like my neighbor.

 

When I first quit, the days went by ever so slowly. Seemed like I'd never get to the 4 weeks. But I have. When I feel like I want to give in, I just tell myself, "but look how far you've come already. Do you really want to go through that all over again", and remind myself that reinstating at this point might cause even more problems than what I'm already going through. And then, I remind myself that I was slowly, steadily moving towards becoming a vegetable. Couldn't think, couldn't focus, and had memory lapse hell. Furiously short temper. How much of a burden did I want to be for my beloved husband?

 

I'm one of the lucky ones, I seem to be a pretty fast healer, but I'm going to have to be careful for years not to let myself get triggered if I can at all help it.

 

Hang in there! I'm rooting for you! Never submit, never surrender!

[[He...]]

Thank you! Today what I notice is mostly feeling still off in my brain.  It's like my eyes cant focus or something.  My vertigo has pretty much eased up. My movement seems jerky. Stuff like that. I never imagined at my low dose and not taking it everyday could do this to me. I'm praying all this will subside soon. I have noticed big improvement now on day 10 but I'm still not over it. I'm praying with the low dose i was on that i can get over this soon. This has been the most awful thing i have ever experienced . Your words help me. Thank you

[Guest [...]]

Thanks Healing....same here today, day 10.  Still feeling off in the brain with a headache as well. We're doing great though pushing through this ...

[[Le...]]

YES you both are.  Push through the need to fight and accept that this is the healing process. 

[[Ma...]]

Thanks Healing....same here today, day 10.  Still feeling off in the brain with a headache as well. We're doing great though pushing through this ...

 

Yes you are doing great. This is a nasty, difficult process to power through.

 

I had to give up my EMDR therapy because my eyes hurt too move the way they need to.

 

Heh. Forgot about the vertigo. I had a lot of that too. Fun times! Mine mostly went away around week 4, I think. Still get a tiny bit here and there. Had some yesterday, but only lasted about 10-15 seconds.

 

When I hit a month, my husband took me out to dinner to celebrate. Had this really weird kid for a server, who told us a story about some drug addled friend of his, whose doctor put him on benzos to get off the drugs. *pause here for a rollage of the eyeballs*

[[He...]]

You all are awesome support! I felt decent enough to get out yesterday which was a huge plus! Still feeling some vertigo and sleep is whacky but it's not as bad. I just keep praying and I will fully recover soon! This has been nasty! I cant even believe a doctor would put someone on benzo to get over another drug-----

Here is praying day 12 is even better - keep it up, everyone

[[He...]]

Also, does/did anyone ever get a short panic almost like you've been startled? I have started doing this at times- really weird . I've noticed it happens when I'm watching television .

[[Ma...]]

Also, does/did anyone ever get a short panic almost like you've been startled? I have started doing this at times- really weird . I've noticed it happens when I'm watching television .

 

Eh, rarely, but does happen every now and again. Doesn't last long enough for me to really worry about it, and I go drink a cup of tulsi to calm down the cortisol. Love tulsi. Tastes like an accident in an Italian spice factory, but seems to work as advertised.

[Guest [...]]

Well we made it through 2 weeks now 😊  that's a good sign, how are things going...

[[He...]]

Hello! My sxs have improved this week. Vertigo is not prevalent all the time- I'd say mostly gone. My main issue is no sleep- if that would come back I'd be better - I know I'm not over this yet but I am hopeful . How are you???

[Guest [...]]

Good to know things are improving for you. Same here, having better days than i did in week 1 ....the sleep issue wish i had an answer to that, I have had sleep issues for years without finding anything very helpful...well hang in there the milestone of 2 weeks feels encouraging

[[He...]]

Yes, hanging in there ! I hope things continue to improve for you,  too! Sometimes I wanna give up but I can see where healing has taken place. Prayers for continued healing for us! Keep in touch and let me know how you are doing. It helps talking with others💙

[[Ma...]]

So, I haven't been on BB for a while. How are you faring these days?

[[He...]]

Mayavata

Hi! I am going in to week 4 and I feel some better. Not nearly dizzy like I was. I have found caffeine is a no no right now. Revs up the symptoms.  I'm also having stomach issues. Overrall I feel it's getting better which gives me hope! Thanks for checking in! I appreciate it so much!

[[Re...]]

I think my worst symptoms were around week three. I seemed to get significantly better around the six week mark.

[[He...]]

Thanks for sharing ! I am praying that the coming weeks get better and better ! Week 1-3 have been bad for me- week 4 has not been as bad thankfully - I am hopeful that things will keep getting better !

[[Ma...]]

Healing77 - RE: caffeine

 

I can relate. I think about week 3-ish, I had a half a dark chocolate candy bar. I was in agony for a day or two (or three, I forget), as I recall. I'd love to have some tea or coffee, but I don't dare yet. I'm feeling pretty good, except for the remnants of a cold my husband so thoughtfully brought home last week.    Discovered by accident to stay away from processed bouillons. That was a wave for a day or two. My waves don't seem to last much longer than that, thankfully. Sometimes, just hours. I can drink home brew now with no ill effects, so all is well in my world.

 

I think my dizzy spells went away around week 6 or 7. Before that, I couldn't hardly exert myself at all without feeling like I was going to faint. As I recall, I think week 6 really sucked a bag of marbles. I was getting better, then regressed that week for some reason. Probably ate something I shouldn't have.

 

I'm at almost 2 months now, and just having muscle pain and tension in my shoulders and neck, and a bit of cog fog, but not nearly as nasty as it was. And lordy, but I think I had bad intestinal gas for the first month, at least. Good thing hubby is really tolerant!    That seems to have cleared up too.

 

Sounds like you're doing okay, though, I'm glad you are feeling better! How's the insomnia?

[[He...]]

Mayavata

Its funny you mentioned intestinal gas because right now I have it something awful and its been like that for a week! The insomnia is not as bad. I take 1 mg melatonin and that seems to help. I tried 3 mg and that was a mistake! Extreme vertigo the next morning! I slept last night for 5 hours in a row! That hasnt happened in a month. I woke up and immediately said,  thank you God!

My biggest issues right now are the horrible gas and other gi issues and bouts of spaciness . The gi problems are keeping me up at night right now. If those would subside I'd feel so much better . Hope it goes away soon!

[[Ma...]]

The gas gets a whole lot worse when you eat anything with sugar in it. I thought I had candida for a while, but nope. Just more benzo wd fun times. It's not nearly as bad now. For a while I was just a rootin' and a tootin' every five minutes. Really loud ones too. LOL This too shall pass. Damn near chased ME out of the room. And the looks the dog gave me! 

 

On the recommendation of a NP, I've been taking 15 mg melatonin and 2 caps of tulsi, which seems kind of excessive to me, but it isn't giving me headaches, so it's all good. My neighbor takes 20mg melatonin. Just from what I'd been telling her about my own wd issues, and problems that people on here have been having (and no, I don't even give out user names), she decided to give up zolpidem. LOL, I'm a bad influence, I guess. But she was having a lot of irritability and anxiety after having been on it for 5 years. Plus, she was pissed off at the hassles she had to go through to get it. I told her she was probably in tolerance. She didn't have any trouble getting off it. I'm very envious. She noticed a difference in her attitude after only a few days. Must be nice. I was stupid for 5 weeks.

 

5 hours in a row? Nice! I've found that even with minimal sleep, I still feel more refreshed than 8 hrs with K and Z. Even if I only get 3 or 4, I still feel more alert than my drugged 8. I only had about 2 last night, and I was okay after the first hour or so. Pity my state doesn't do medical marijuana. Might help with the sleep.

 

I'm pretty well over the really bad bouts of spaciness. Just a hiccup here and there. At least I'm not sleep cooking anymore. That was scaring the shit out of me and my husband. I could have burnt the house down. 

[[He...]]

I love your sense of humor! You have made me chuckle  it helps to laugh! I am at 4 weeks today benzo free! Random tingling and spaciness, GI issues - ugh-  going on- hope that will fade in the coming weeks! Gotta focus on the positive as much as possible!