I could use advice for dealing with rage.

[[NH...]]

There seem to be a great many side effects we have to fight when it comes to tapering off benzos.

Some I can live with, like the shaky feeling. Others I have figured out how to beat such as sleep problems.

The one that I could use some advice with is the rage.

For me the rage comes out of almost nowhere, it can be a criticism, insult, joke, etc, and I fly from 0-100 instantly. The advice I have found on dealing with anger always seems to assume you can recognize it ahead of time or that you can see it growing enough to stop yourself.

I can't.

As I said it's 0-100 instantly. Once i'm angry it's too late to stop it or think, it's just "Hulk smash" time.

I do my best to avoid situations that could lead to the rage. I avoid people I know are likely to trigger my anger.

But sometimes that is not enough, and I lose it over an offhand comment or a feeling of not being in control.

It seems like an impossible riddle to me. I can't stop the rage before it starts, and once it starts I can't think about anything with a clear enough mind to use any techniques designed to reduce anger.

To make matters even worse I am a black belt in multiple martial arts so I could really get myself in trouble with this problem.

I've heard people say that I should use a punching bag to get rid of my rage but that doesn't work because when i'm angry I am fixated on the source of my anger and nothing else.

Of all of the side effects I am experiencing this one is by far the most concerning.

 

As it stands the only solution I have is to get through this withdrawal with minimum damage and to a place where I am off the benzos and back in control. That is looking like it will be around 3.5 years from now and I would prefer to have some strategies to work with during that time.

 

If anyone has any thoughts at all on this I am all ears. Even if you are just making up an answer that sounds like it might help, I would love the extra brains on this one.

[Guest [so...]]

This is exactly my biggest issue, I could've written this myself, no idea how to manage it.

[[Jo...]]

I understand exactly what you are talking about. In the past I was generally a very calm person and almost never got in disputes. But once I started to go into tolerance and when I began to taper I developed unexplainable rage. I feel I can fly off the handle at the littlest insult or upset. I have lost several relationships over this already. This is a well known symptom of benzo withdrawal so we are not alone. Unfortunately, I can’t find a solution except that I now avoid social situations as best as possible. That may mean a long time for me too. The best I do is before I even go into a social situation I tell myself I have this temporary problem and tell myself to keep my mouth quiet at all costs. I find that if I put myself on notice like this ahead of time it prevents me from acting poorly. It is almost like I warn myself ahead of time so I can just clamp it down before it starts. That is the best I have come up with so far.

[Guest [NM...]]

Like alcohol rages, there are benzo rages. I have experienced the same thing and one can see the evidence in my house where I’ve thrown things. I’m over this, but it was horrible. There were situations in my life that precipitated this too. Huge family traumas. It was HORRIBLE. My heart goes out to you.

[[mo...]]

Sorry to hear this NHF. I experienced rage when I stopped taking trazedone and I also had bouts of rage tapering Klonopin. I’m not sure how you can manage the rage other than stay away from what triggers you. But I can say in my case at least, it definitely didn’t last my entire taper. I didn’t have it in the beginning then I had it and then at some point I got more calm and I’m more drowsy and sleepy now than anything. Sure every once in a while I’ll feel it a bit but I also have young kids so of course I’m at the end of my rope sometimes. My point is to hopefully give you comfort that this likely won’t last your entire taper. Symptoms come and go and this will probably leave while some other, hopefully less nasty, symptom takes it’s place. In the meantime try spending some time in nature. I’m not confident it will help but it definitely can’t hurt. All the best to you.

 

MoTo

[[NH...]]

Thank you.

 

It is reassuring to hear that others have gone through this and have it pass. I was guessing that time would help with the problem, but it is good to have some evidence beyond just guessing.

 

Oddly I have found that just joining this forum has helped. I think part of my problem was feeling very alone as I go through this WD. The people in my life don't get it, but seeing such a large group of people who do understand makes me feel less alone.

 

Seeing that an online group can have an effect has made me realize that the opposite effect can also be true, and as such I am avoiding YouTube content creators and such that are focused on purely negative things. People's complaints about things can be infectious it seems, and so those who put out videos about how much they hate a movie or show isn't doing me any good. Likewise i'm avoiding the news, which also is very focused on negativity.

Hopefully this will help but of course only time will truly tell.

 

I will try to get out into nature a bit more mountaintop1. Lately I have been holed up in my house, I never really had social anxiety before in my life but right now I definitely do. I guess I shall have to face that head on instead of hiding from it.