What do you do all day besides freak out?

[[su...]]

I'm almost 4 months off benzos and I have DP, anxiety, suicidal ideation, extreme sweating, very bad benzo brain/ brain fog. I can't stop looking back on my life and all my mistakes and ruminating on one thing to the next. I have bouts of anger I try to keep tabs on. Symptoms get worse at different times and sometimes I can't do anything but sit and freak out with anxiety. In general though I'm so bored. I'm tired of sitting here in this state. I'm sick of tv. I can read some now depending on my symptoms and go for walks. I want to exercise but its hard to motive because I can't drink coffee and when I've tried I get grouchy. I seriously wish in this messed up state I had something more to do. What do other people do to pass the time?

[[Ea...]]

I honestly think that boredom is a good sign. I was in such a state of terror that I literally longed to feel bored again. I know that it’s hard to get motivated to exercise, but I highly suggest u give it a go. There’s this thing that happens to me that my mom has always referred to as “analysis paralysis”. If I sit & think about something for too long, I’ll always find a reason not to do it. I think that happens to all of us in degrees. Try not to think about how u feel, or how u think ur going to feel afterwards bc u really won’t know until u try. And even though it may rev some sx up, it’s not going to hurt u, only help. It may not give u immediate relief, but I guarantee that if u make it a habit you’ll notice a lot of things start to get better. Sleep, energy levels, appetite, mood, etc. within 2-3 weeks of making exercise a daily habit all of these things improved. I know that it’s difficult, but only u know what u truly can & cant endure. Keeping urself busy will definitely help make this process easier to deal with. Hope things get better for u, hang in there, all the best in healing.

[[su...]]

Easydoesit45 thanks so much! Not being able to exercise has been adding to my depressed mood so thanks so much for the encouragement. I'm definitely gonna use your success with it to motivate to do it even if it ups my symptoms some.

[[Gw...]]

I felt similar at 4 months off. Very limited ability to moderate moods. It was exhausting, but it has gotten better. I'm glad you're reading and walking! Personally, I have found walking outside in the sunlight to be one of, if not THE, best coping/self-care strategy throughout this journey. Have you thought about taking up a hobby? I learned to crochet, and planted a garden. I made myself be more sociable too, and that has greatly enriched my life over the past year. Good luck!

[[Th...]]

iPad games

[[Ea...]]

Easydoesit45 thanks so much! Not being able to exercise has been adding to my depressed mood so thanks so much for the encouragement. I'm definitely gonna use your success with it to motivate to do it even if it ups my symptoms some.

 

Of course! Definitely give it a try. And try not to quit if it revs ur sx up. I told myself that no matter how I feel, I’m going to go running bc I KNOW that it is beneficial to my health even if it doesn’t provide immediate relief. I kind of have a theory on exercise, & specifically cardio. So basically our systems r so over sensitive that any sort of stimuli causes a “wave” of sx. Based on how threatening our brains perceive this stimuli, will determine the intensity level of these sx. The thing with cardio is that it does rev up these sx, but it seems like it helps raise the threshold as well. For some reason ever since I made it a habit, that my brain can now differentiate what sort of stimuli constitutes a “wave” sort of reaction. Does that make sense? It’s like that mental and physical exhaustion helps re teach those receptors what is the appropriate type of response to stress. Now, by no means do I know if this is what is actually taking place, but what I do know? Is that I haven’t gone more than 2-3 days without running in almost 3 month’s & I feel amazing. It’s become so beneficial to how I feel overall that I feel that I NEED to do it now. It helps with so many things that I there’s no way I’ll stop. I hope that u can find that this works too. I realize everyone is different but at the same time the effects of cardiovascular exercise r a proven fact to b positive when it comes to overall health. Hang in there & keep pushing. You’ll figure it out, & once u do it’s like finding the holy grail, lol. All the best in healing.

[[su...]]

Thanks so much guys! I finally figured out how to make a ticker and looked at my datebook and figured out I'm just at the 3 month mark not 4  . Oh well. I guess if I'm starting to feel slightly better at 3 months I can really count on hitting 4. Gonna def. start hitting the gym.