can mental symptoms change

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this last 2 weeks my symptoms especially have taken a turn for the worse. Almost scary in fact. Im 1 year off ativan. It starts when I first awake in the am with an uneasy feeling, then onto a panicky shaking terror feeling. then onto not feeling right in the head at all. I mean not at all. its a weird feeling that something takes over my brain and I dont feel with it or right for mins to hours. It can kind of feel physical too in my head. im constantly feeling weird stuff inside my brain. I dont know if a person can physically feel neurons connecting it just feels off. then the other morning while in and out of sleep I heard someone in my head say really loud...go to sleep. evening time can be a little better but I still dont feel right. im NON functioning I can handle NO stress. even as I sit here and type right now I feel weird wavy feelings in my brain. talking to people I feel bizarre. these mental symptoms are new these last few weeks I dont feel normal. I =ve had a few attacks dont know if they are panic attacks where I feel strange, heart racing, brain feels like its being assaulted, I call my husband at work when this happens and say I dont feel good, I dont feel right, something is wrong,. is this all just high very interns anxiety? I went to er again today because of the bizarre sensations in my brain, they could do nothing for me. while going there as a passenger I could hardly stand it, I felt like I was in outerspace with cares flying at us. the world as too loud, too bright. I've had sensory overload before all along but not to this degree. I cant even respond to my kids and communicate. Ive been staying in my dark room. why am I getting worse? Ive always dealt with anxiety and depression could this be a psychosis coming on? schizophrenia? I just feel different and not grounded or connected.

im not minimzing others symptoms as I know most are sufferly terribly but im truly housebound. I dont even take my 3 yr old outside. I feel something is really wrong mentally. please tell me if you've experinced this stuff and made it through.

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No one?

[Guest [so...]]

What you are describing is pretty much the hallmark of benzo wd, the sense of unease and bizarre brain stuff, ativan is known as the devil's own drug so congratulations on being off it for a year, that you feel you are getting worse is because of the non linear pattern of benzo wd. I'm 16 months off (Valium) and have experienced most of what you are describing over the past 5 months and yes it gets much much worse when i'm in a wave. At the moment i'm getting waves of up to 4 weeks where the mental torture increases and then will come a window where i feel almost normal, unfortunately the window only lasts about 2 weeks and then i'm back to the early morning toxic wake ups, fear and DR and hypersensitivity. In these waves i forget who i am, i feel disconnected from everything and everybody with massive sensory overload and i'm mostly housebound crying and totally out of it plus a few nasty physical sxs to boot.

 

For most of us this is a tough, long and lonely journey but there are things you can do to try and help, eat clean, no caffeine, alcohol and distract as much as you can. The fact that i am having windows gives me hope that i will eventually heal from this nightmare, and in a window i tell myself that the sxs getting worse are just evidence of my nervous system in turmoil and out of balance, of course when i'm in a wave i don't think quite so rationally and i have to hold on very tight when the depression and SI hits. I've never had anxiety or depression in my life before this nightmare and it's seriously terrifying so i really feel for you when you say you've battled it for most of your life, i can't imagine how hard that must be.

 

Hang in there, you will heal, the non linear aspect of all this makes us doubt that and it's soooo frustrating and soul destroying, but you have so much to hang in there for, personally i hate that statement that "time heals" so i've started to think differently, i now think "everybody else heals, so why shouldn't I", it's just taking too damn long!

SS x

[[Fo...]]

Hi again

I think you are describing the absolute torment of chronic anxiety.  I don’t think you are going psychotic, it’s excruciating anxiety.  There are other non benzo treatments —- I hope you find one.

Perhaps another member has some ideas for you.

But as SS says withdrawal doesn’t stick to neat rules of time and degree. 

Best wishes

Dick

[Guest [su...]]

I have this too. Pretty intense and really scary! Like something is moving around in my braim. I am 19 months off. Have had like this for a month now. Mental wave

I feel like you. Do you have dr dp?

[[Fo...]]

Absolutely as above.

I mowed the grass in the hail yesterday and was so chuffed I had a Thai curry (and BAD lad) two glasses of red wine.

So after a night of gutache and the terrors this morning my brain is playing tricks on me-(((

VIS

I am getting worse

I can’t think straight

I am talking rubbish on phone

I shouldn’t have stopped Seroquel

I have pixxed off my docs, family and friends..

I may have pixxed off BB

Crying again. 

Round and round.  I dunno what it’s called but it’s horrid. Bother.

Dickie

 

[[Yu...]]

this last 2 weeks my symptoms especially have taken a turn for the worse. Almost scary in fact. Im 1 year off ativan. It starts when I first awake in the am with an uneasy feeling, then onto a panicky shaking terror feeling. then onto not feeling right in the head at all. I mean not at all. its a weird feeling that something takes over my brain and I dont feel with it or right for mins to hours. It can kind of feel physical too in my head. im constantly feeling weird stuff inside my brain. I dont know if a person can physically feel neurons connecting it just feels off. then the other morning while in and out of sleep I heard someone in my head say really loud...go to sleep. evening time can be a little better but I still dont feel right. im NON functioning I can handle NO stress. even as I sit here and type right now I feel weird wavy feelings in my brain. talking to people I feel bizarre. these mental symptoms are new these last few weeks I dont feel normal. I =ve had a few attacks dont know if they are panic attacks where I feel strange, heart racing, brain feels like its being assaulted, I call my husband at work when this happens and say I dont feel good, I dont feel right, something is wrong,. is this all just high very interns anxiety? I went to er again today because of the bizarre sensations in my brain, they could do nothing for me. while going there as a passenger I could hardly stand it, I felt like I was in outerspace with cares flying at us. the world as too loud, too bright. I've had sensory overload before all along but not to this degree. I cant even respond to my kids and communicate. Ive been staying in my dark room. why am I getting worse? Ive always dealt with anxiety and depression could this be a psychosis coming on? schizophrenia? I just feel different and not grounded or connected.

im not minimzing others symptoms as I know most are sufferly terribly but im truly housebound. I dont even take my 3 yr old outside. I feel something is really wrong mentally. please tell me if you've experinced this stuff and made it through.

Did you have anxiety before benzos? Do you have support of husband or family? Dont tortue yourself. You are not going mad. Everything will be ok in time.

[[He...]]

I can relate to these symptoms as well but they are getting better for me at the moment. I am in a window.  When a wave is coming one of the first things I notice is my vision will feel off. Kind of like when I was in acute but not as bad. It’s like the world tilts a little and it is harder to focus. My brain will feel off. The DP/DR will come back too. I’ll speak and my voice feels disconnected from my body.

It’s my voice but it doesn’t sound like it belongs to me. My hands will look strange to me too. I know they’re mine but they look foreign. This used to create an intense fear response. Each time this happens seems a little better. I’m able to tell myself this is the sign a wave is coming. It will pass. I’m healing. It’s gradually getting better. I just passed the 9 month mark of being benzo free so I know it could get worse at anytime. The mental stuff is the worst. Keep telling yourself this will get better. This is a sign of my brain healing. Praying for a window for you.

[Guest [su...]]

I can relate to these symptoms as well but they are getting better for me at the moment. I am in a window.  When a wave is coming one of the first things I notice is my vision will feel off. Kind of like when I was in acute but not as bad. It’s like the world tilts a little and it is harder to focus. My brain will feel off. The DP/DR will come back too. I’ll speak and my voice feels disconnected from my body.

It’s my voice but it doesn’t sound like it belongs to me. My hands will look strange to me too. I know they’re mine but they look foreign. This used to create an intense fear response. Each time this happens seems a little better. I’m able to tell myself this is the sign a wave is coming. It will pass. I’m healing. It’s gradually getting better. I just passed the 9 month mark of being benzo free so I know it could get worse at anytime. The mental stuff is the worst. Keep telling yourself this will get better. This is a sign of my brain healing. Praying for a window for you.

I have had dr dp nonstop fpr 12 months 

[[Yu...]]

I can relate to these symptoms as well but they are getting better for me at the moment. I am in a window.  When a wave is coming one of the first things I notice is my vision will feel off. Kind of like when I was in acute but not as bad. It’s like the world tilts a little and it is harder to focus. My brain will feel off. The DP/DR will come back too. I’ll speak and my voice feels disconnected from my body.

It’s my voice but it doesn’t sound like it belongs to me. My hands will look strange to me too. I know they’re mine but they look foreign. This used to create an intense fear response. Each time this happens seems a little better. I’m able to tell myself this is the sign a wave is coming. It will pass. I’m healing. It’s gradually getting better. I just passed the 9 month mark of being benzo free so I know it could get worse at anytime. The mental stuff is the worst. Keep telling yourself this will get better. This is a sign of my brain healing. Praying for a window for you.

I have had dr dp nonstop fpr 12 months 

Sun how do you feel on 12.5 mg Seroquel?

[Guest [su...]]

I can relate to these symptoms as well but they are getting better for me at the moment. I am in a window.  When a wave is coming one of the first things I notice is my vision will feel off. Kind of like when I was in acute but not as bad. It’s like the world tilts a little and it is harder to focus. My brain will feel off. The DP/DR will come back too. I’ll speak and my voice feels disconnected from my body.

It’s my voice but it doesn’t sound like it belongs to me. My hands will look strange to me too. I know they’re mine but they look foreign. This used to create an intense fear response. Each time this happens seems a little better. I’m able to tell myself this is the sign a wave is coming. It will pass. I’m healing. It’s gradually getting better. I just passed the 9 month mark of being benzo free so I know it could get worse at anytime. The mental stuff is the worst. Keep telling yourself this will get better. This is a sign of my brain healing. Praying for a window for you.

I have had dr dp nonstop fpr 12 months 

Sun how do you feel on 12.5 mg Seroquel?

I feel more emotions. Very sad. Cry a lot. No w/d sxs from Seroquel. Will taper down to 6.25 mg

[[Yu...]]

I can relate to these symptoms as well but they are getting better for me at the moment. I am in a window.  When a wave is coming one of the first things I notice is my vision will feel off. Kind of like when I was in acute but not as bad. It’s like the world tilts a little and it is harder to focus. My brain will feel off. The DP/DR will come back too. I’ll speak and my voice feels disconnected from my body.

It’s my voice but it doesn’t sound like it belongs to me. My hands will look strange to me too. I know they’re mine but they look foreign. This used to create an intense fear response. Each time this happens seems a little better. I’m able to tell myself this is the sign a wave is coming. It will pass. I’m healing. It’s gradually getting better. I just passed the 9 month mark of being benzo free so I know it could get worse at anytime. The mental stuff is the worst. Keep telling yourself this will get better. This is a sign of my brain healing. Praying for a window for you.

I have had dr dp nonstop fpr 12 months 

Sun how do you feel on 12.5 mg Seroquel?

I feel more emotions. Very sad. Cry a lot. No w/d sxs from Seroquel. Will taper down to 6.25 mg

I feel the same. Just cant stop crying. How long did you use seroquel?

[Guest [su...]]

I can relate to these symptoms as well but they are getting better for me at the moment. I am in a window.  When a wave is coming one of the first things I notice is my vision will feel off. Kind of like when I was in acute but not as bad. It’s like the world tilts a little and it is harder to focus. My brain will feel off. The DP/DR will come back too. I’ll speak and my voice feels disconnected from my body.

It’s my voice but it doesn’t sound like it belongs to me. My hands will look strange to me too. I know they’re mine but they look foreign. This used to create an intense fear response. Each time this happens seems a little better. I’m able to tell myself this is the sign a wave is coming. It will pass. I’m healing. It’s gradually getting better. I just passed the 9 month mark of being benzo free so I know it could get worse at anytime. The mental stuff is the worst. Keep telling yourself this will get better. This is a sign of my brain healing. Praying for a window for you.

I have had dr dp nonstop fpr 12 months 

Sun how do you feel on 12.5 mg Seroquel?

I feel more emotions. Very sad. Cry a lot. No w/d sxs from Seroquel. Will taper down to 6.25 mg

I feel the same. Just cant stop crying. How long did you use seroquel?

7 months

[[Fo...]]

Re Seroquel

Off it after four years jumped at 25. Day 11. Which I regret. Huge anxiety. Luckily phenergan takes edge of it, but will have to stop that soon.

We are so different ...... on another site they 50% of folk no sequelae others say three years of hell.

I wish there was a definitive answer

Dickies

[[...]]

I’ve been up for almost 48 hours because I’m freaking out my mind chatter, hearing something in my head tell me to got to sleep, then a few nights ago when closing my eyes I seen scary images.

[[in...]]

One thing you might look into for helping calm the brain and getting it to map and function right with less anxiety is "nureo feedback." I did it through the second have of my taper and it really helped me. Just a thought.  Hang in there.