Clonazepam not working right since first dose

[[El...]]

I've been on Clonazepam for almost 3 years.  Right from the start I felt like it never worked right for me.  It would take the edge off my anxiety but never take it away completely.  I still live with almost constant anxiety daily even being on it.  It's been this way since the start.  I have never had an anxiety free day and have even increased my dose as high as 4 mgs per day at times.  I am currently weaning from a dosage of 1.5 mg per day.  I started January 2019 and am currently at about 0.95 mgs.  My psychiatrist would never listen to me that it wasn't working for me and insisted I continue to take it.  I now believe that it's making me worse than if I had never started at all.  I am sure I have hit tolerance withdrawal and know that I have to get off of this stuff.  My GP agrees with me that I am having an unusual reaction to it and believes that as I get lower and lower on my dose that I should feel better as it shouldn't cause as much anxiety. I am just wondering if anyone else has had this experience of believing that their benzo never helped right from the beginning or has made their anxiety worse?  Also if you've felt this way what was your taper like? Has the anxiety gotten better? Worse? Thanks.

[[Ta...]]

Me! Me! Klonopin messed me up from the very beginning, I just wasn't aware of why I suddenly felt so awful all the time. I'm down to .0425 of Klonopin and sometimes I think I'm getting more windows  of good on lower doses, other times waves hit me so hard. So unfortunately, I really can't tell you. I do think the general trend is I'm better here than at .5. I wish you all the best! We can do this!

[[El...]]

Thank you Takingontitration.  I knew I couldn't be the only one.  And interestingly after the birth of my children.  My son was born Jan 2014.  The anxiety hit when he was about 2 months old.  I was put on Cipralex which worked wonders.  Was on it for most of that first year and by the year I had weaned myself off and was back to "normal".  Then I had my daughter in Feb 2016.  The anxiety hit like a tidal wave the day after I had her.  I have tried so many things to make me feel better.....antidepressants, natural treatments, etc. but nothing helps.  And then my psychiatrist had the brilliant idea of going the Clonazepam route.  Anyhow it's nice to know that I am not the only one who has had trouble with this medication right from the start.  I believe that our hormones have a huge part to play in us feeling this way after a pregnancy.  And it seems like the doctors don't have any good knowledge in this area.  My psychiatrist actually told me that they are starting to look at the role of hormones with post partum anxiety and depression but they are just in the infancy stages.  She said likely in 20 or 30 years from now if a woman starts having problems with depression or anxiety during or after pregnancy that instead of treating with antidepressants they will likely be treating hormones instead.  Makes so much sense to me. Who knows though if she's right.  Anyhow thank you for responding. I am hoping that I so start to feel better the lower I go.  This is my second attempt.  The first was exactly like that.  My first cut was hard with a lot of symptoms but then after that each cut I made I started to feel more and more like myself.  Until things went sideways.  Still not sure why that happened.  This second attempt though is way different.  Having symptoms all that was down and really struggling way more.  But I am hoping at some point things will change. I wish you the best of luck with your taper.  We will get through this!!! 

[[Ta...]]

Ellynn, I'm so sorry this has been your experience too. Mine was absolutely hormones in hindsight as my period had just returned 9 months in. Unfortunately, I feel like an awful mom right now with how I've been feeling. I hope you are fairing better than I am. That said, we will be much better moms on the other side of this! What dosage are you down to? What is your titration plan? What are your symptoms?

[[El...]]

I SO understand feeling like an awful Mom.  Trying to take care of kids adds a whole new element to trying to get off this stuff.  I have so much guilt about it.  And am always worried if I am doing the right thing with the kids......do I let them see me when I'm not feeling good or do I try and hide it from them.  So hard.  Just yesterday my son asked my why I cry all the time.  It broke my heart.  I am down from 1.5 mg to 0.95 mg per day split between morning and nighttime.  I have been weaning since the end of January.  Currently I am reducing by 10% every two weeks.  That said I held at 1 mg for most of April as I just couldn't go down due to symptoms.  My symptoms are: rebound anxiety (especially bad in the mornings), heart issues (palpitations, feeling weak, feeling heavy, sometimes beating too fast etc.), shortness of breath, blurred vision at times, extreme teeth grinding, major muscle tension especially when sleeping at night and bladder issues (feels like I always have a UTI). How about you?

 

[[Ta...]]

Yeah. I kind of walk around--even on not terrible days-- like a sleepwalker. I have no positive emotions at all. I fake it for them, of course. But I do get windows that remind me what life can be like. Those help keep me going. Many days I just cry and/ or get frustrated really easily. My daughter turns 2 next month. She is getting more and more cognizant all the time of my emotions. That's why I feel so pressed for time. Not that time isn't important to everyone. But children are so vulnerable. They need good parents.

 

Mind if I direct message you? Sounds like we could really use each  other for support.

[[El...]]

Absolutely you can.