dissociation/depersonalization and klonopin

[[se...]]

hi everyone, i'm new here.

 

i've been tapering off of klonopin for about a month now, kind of went a little quick between .75mgs and .5mgs and now am waiting at .5 mgs to let my body even out a bit. i don't know much about tapering but i do know that after my insurance dumped me, i don't have a way of refilling for at least two months so i need to withdraw. i wanted to so badly anyways, klonopin stopped really helping and gave me the worst depression of my entire life.

 

a little background, i was in an awful car accident (t-boned by speeding red light runner, car spun out, flipped and hit a cement divider, then rolled a billion times) in june of 2018 and hit my head during it, but completely forgot i did until later. i didn't even remember passing out. ended up back in the ER in august, having quite possibly the worst panic attacks of my life along with heavy dissociation, migraines, etc. no one knew what was going on, after a ton of research, and having to quit driving and working, found out i had post concussive syndrome/a traumatic brain injury. started taking klonopin to deal with at least a dozen panic attacks per day, a full living hell. still dealing with the brain injury but am also trying to get off the klonopin since the panic attacks are almost fully gone now.

 

currently i'm in a week where instead of the cold sweats and anxiety, it's been replaced with a weird feeling of dissociation. i feel very out of it. the first few weeks were much more flu-like, but this is just awful (its giving me flashbacks to august).

 

does anyone have experience with dissociation/depersonalization during tapering from benzos (klonopin in particular)? anything is helpful.

[[Fo...]]

Yes

Several of us get it

I also get “ imposter syndrome “

Suggest you search on home page for depersonalisation and you can see several threads.

It does get better SLOWLY SADLY

dick

[[hi...]]

Hi Seafoam, I am currently at .75K and have severe dp/dr. It is definitely the scariest symtom of this whole withdrawal. I can’t offer much advice, but you are not alone. Hang in there!

[[de...]]

Hi Seafoam,

 

Yes, I am derealised/depersonalised.  It started in tolerance, but not as bad as it became when tapering. 

 

Now that I've stopped taking Valium, 2 months ago, it has improved a lot.  Last week I thought I was 'cured' (wishful thinking)  , because had a terrific day seeing the world in all of its fine detail.

 

It didn't last, but can report now, that it fluctuates.  I zoom in and out.   

 

A pity it didn't last, but I read these fluctuations as being the early signs of complete healing. 

 

It is so slow.  Something I just have to accept.

 

We'll get there.  And, it stops being so scary. 

 

Dee

 

 

[[se...]]

Yes

Several of us get it

I also get “ imposter syndrome “

Suggest you search on home page for depersonalisation and you can see several threads.

It does get better SLOWLY SADLY

dick

 

that kind of imposter syndrome- being really unsure and insecure about your identity, i totally get that and i think that and dissociation are the hardest symptoms i've had to ever go through. to lose your grip on reality makes everything else happening so much harder and so much more painful. i will search some more threads but thank you for replying, it's good to know other people get it too so i don't feel so isolated.

 

Hi Seafoam, I am currently at .75K and have severe dp/dr. It is definitely the scariest symtom of this whole withdrawal. I can’t offer much advice, but you are not alone. Hang in there!

 

just hearing that i'm not alone is so comforting!! thank you so much. i'll hang in there for you guys too 

[[se...]]

Hi Seafoam,

 

Yes, I am derealised/depersonalised.  It started in tolerance, but not as bad as it became when tapering. 

 

Now that I've stopped taking Valium, 2 months ago, it has improved a lot.  Last week I thought I was 'cured' (wishful thinking)  , because had a terrific day seeing the world in all of its fine detail.

 

It didn't last, but can report now, that it fluctuates.  I zoom in and out.   

 

A pity it didn't last, but I read these fluctuations as being the early signs of complete healing. 

 

It is so slow.  Something I just have to accept.

 

We'll get there.  And, it stops being so scary. 

 

Dee

 

that's so helpful. i noticed it getting worse during the latter half of my use of klonopin, i guess because of tolerance, but once i started tapering, even a little bit, it got so much worse. i hope to start the final third of my taper very soon, and i have a feeling that being off it entirely will help, though it will produce other symptoms. i'd much rather have flu-like symptoms and other more physical things than the depersonalization.

 

i go through some days where i feel like it's gone!- and then suddenly at the end of the day it starts up again. it's been so long since i've seen the world 'clearly' and felt like i'm really 'here', so when i'm getting better even a little bit will be worth it for me.

 

we'll both make it someday!! gotta keep my endurance up and just sit it out even if it takes a year or two... :'( but it'll come

[[Li...]]

I didn't know anything about side effects when tapering benzos. I went way too fast and had dp and dr which was terrifying. Thought I was losing my mind.

 

I updosed to .5 and started a liquid taper at a slower pace. I still have some dp/dr, but it's not near as bad. Today I drove and did not have to think about every single detail of the process from outside myself. Just got where I was going and then thought, "Wow. I just drove like normal and arrived safe without being scared."

 

When I get that stuff now I kind of sink into the zone like an observer. I remind myself that it is a side effect and let myself float along and try to stay calm.

 

With it clearing some just in a slow taper, I can only imagine that it will clear even more and be gone some time after I get off totally.

 

Hang in there and try not to be scared (which is a hard thing I know).

[[Pe...]]

hi everyone, i'm new here.

 

i've been tapering off of klonopin for about a month now, kind of went a little quick between .75mgs and .5mgs and now am waiting at .5 mgs to let my body even out a bit. i don't know much about tapering but i do know that after my insurance dumped me, i don't have a way of refilling for at least two months so i need to withdraw. i wanted to so badly anyways, klonopin stopped really helping and gave me the worst depression of my entire life.

 

a little background, i was in an awful car accident (t-boned by speeding red light runner, car spun out, flipped and hit a cement divider, then rolled a billion times) in june of 2018 and hit my head during it, but completely forgot i did until later. i didn't even remember passing out. ended up back in the ER in august, having quite possibly the worst panic attacks of my life along with heavy dissociation, migraines, etc. no one knew what was going on, after a ton of research, and having to quit driving and working, found out i had post concussive syndrome/a traumatic brain injury. started taking klonopin to deal with at least a dozen panic attacks per day, a full living hell. still dealing with the brain injury but am also trying to get off the klonopin since the panic attacks are almost fully gone now.

 

currently i'm in a week where instead of the cold sweats and anxiety, it's been replaced with a weird feeling of dissociation. i feel very out of it. the first few weeks were much more flu-like, but this is just awful (its giving me flashbacks to august).

 

does anyone have experience with dissociation/depersonalization during tapering from benzos (klonopin in particular)? anything is helpful.

 

Yes a lot of people experience this.  I do as well. Like you, i tapered fast at the beginning going from .5 to .25 and felt like I have the flu for weeks.  I def recommend starting to slow taper soon.  Cutting like that will likely catch up to you. My symptoms have changed and are up and down constantly. No rhyme or reason. 

[[se...]]

I didn't know anything about side effects when tapering benzos. I went way too fast and had dp and dr which was terrifying. Thought I was losing my mind.

 

I updosed to .5 and started a liquid taper at a slower pace. I still have some dp/dr, but it's not near as bad. Today I drove and did not have to think about every single detail of the process from outside myself. Just got where I was going and then thought, "Wow. I just drove like normal and arrived safe without being scared."

 

When I get that stuff now I kind of sink into the zone like an observer. I remind myself that it is a side effect and let myself float along and try to stay calm.

 

With it clearing some just in a slow taper, I can only imagine that it will clear even more and be gone some time after I get off totally.

 

Hang in there and try not to be scared (which is a hard thing I know).

 

good to know you were able to drive. my dissociation is so bad, added to my brain injury, that i can't drive whatsoever. i wish i could. i will think about a slow liquid taper, i've paused at .5 for now.

[[Fo...]]

Sea foam

I hope the pause just gives you a bit of cam. I know that holding can be criticised but sometimes we need just to tread water, but hopefully not for too long. And of course slowing our tapers as I should have done is a way of coping.

Best wishes

Dick