Can't stop controlling my breathing... Still.

[[Li...]]

I don't understand what this is or why it is happening. I have no idea how to fix it or just endure/live with it..

 

I fell into a wave and developed shortness of breath during a physical panic attack, that I had out of the blue. I noticed my breathing and then suddenly began controlling it. I haven't been able to stop for over a month now.

 

I've received a few replies of people stating they have had it too and that it went away, but I cannot just see it going away. My mind wants hyperfocus on my breathing and it becomes unnatural and forced. The problem is.. I don't mean to do this. I keep trying to distract away from it, but it's very hard. I have small moments where I am able to distract away, like when I am eating or having a conversation, but it doesn't last long..

 

I cannot live like this, it's all I can think about. I know that physically I am fine and I know that the body will always breathe on it's own, because I sleep fine and my body takes over, also in moments of distraction.

 

It just feels so uncomfortable and I have no idea how much to inhale or exhale, it's like I have to think about it and I just don't want to. I know that I can do deep breathing through my diaphragm and I do, but I don't want to have to focus on breathing all day, everyday.

 

Why the hell is my brain working like this? Can it be fixed without the aid of medication? It's so hard to care about anything else.

[[Ch...]]

I'm sorry this is happening to you, LiveAboutIt.  It sounds like you know exactly what's going on, just not how to stop it.  I don't know either, except to do what you're doing...reaching out and asking others for their coping strategies.  Distraction is what most of us feel is the most effective way to get through symptoms like this, and sometimes it takes awhile to find the right distractions.

 

You asked, 'Why the hell is my brain working like this? Can it be fixed without the aid of medication?' Unless this is a pre-existing issue, I would guess your brain is working (or not working) like this because of medication, and will fix itself as the body naturally knows to do.

 

You're doing exactly what you need to do right now, in my opinion...finding and using coping techniques to get through this.  For some people physical distractions work best, for some, mental distractions work best.  Or both.

 

 

[[Ma...]]

controlling the breath is not always the solution. Sometimes its better to trust your body and let it breathe the way it needs although it feels not good,- just let it breathe - this does not always lead into a hyperventilation. Can you just watch what your body is doing and saying "you will do the right thing" - I know its difficult, but I had years in which this helped more then forcing deep and regular breathing...

 

if this doesn't fit for you, - no problem. Here comes a hug

[[Li...]]

I'm sorry this is happening to you, LiveAboutIt.  It sounds like you know exactly what's going on, just not how to stop it.  I don't know either, except to do what you're doing...reaching out and asking others for their coping strategies.  Distraction is what most of us feel is the most effective way to get through symptoms like this, and sometimes it takes awhile to find the right distractions.

 

You asked, 'Why the hell is my brain working like this? Can it be fixed without the aid of medication?' Unless this is a pre-existing issue, I would guess your brain is working (or not working) like this because of medication, and will fix itself as the body naturally knows to do.

 

You're doing exactly what you need to do right now, in my opinion...finding and using coping techniques to get through this.  For some people physical distractions work best, for some, mental distractions work best.  Or both.

 

Thank you, Challis. Yeah, all I can seem to do is try my best to distract.. I've come to the realization that worrying about it isn't going to make it go away, so it's kind of pointless.. It doesn't stop the anxious thoughts about it and I do catch myself analyzing and trying to figure a way out, at times, but I do my best to bring myself back to the moment and try to just live despite having it.

 

I have had this breathing anxiety issue in the past, but it was brought on by cold turkeying an SSRI, Celexa, namely. I haven't had this issue for over 17 months and I thought I would never have it again. It came back during this most recent wave that was causing me to have physical panic attacks without a cause. I'm not used to having them, so it sent me into a tailspin. I went 6 weeks in a window, feeling pretty great, with manageable anxiety. Just suddenly had severe shortness of breath out of the blue, dizziness hit me like a giant truck and I felt like I was going to pass out. I did my best to self talk, but I ended up in the ER. Everything came back fine, but this just continued to happen, until it just stopped on it's own.. But I was left with this conscious breathing issue, along with severe anxiety.

 

I know that there is anxiety in the background, because I'm always fixated on something. Whether it's thoughts, breathing, etc. And I do have strange intrusive thoughts here and there that completely make me question my morality, but I ignore them for the most part, because I know what they are. And I wouldn't be having all of these issues, if I weren't somehow anxious.. And because I don't really have a reason to be anxious, I guess I can just chalk it up to chemical anxiety from withdrawal, even though I tend to forget or even doubt that this is happening.

 

All I can do is keep moving forward and do my best to cope with this symptom. Just curious if anyone else has ever struggled with this and what they did to cope, as you mentioned.

 

controlling the breath is not always the solution. Sometimes its better to trust your body and let it breathe the way it needs although it feels not good,- just let it breathe - this does not always lead into a hyperventilation. Can you just watch what your body is doing and saying "you will do the right thing" - I know its difficult, but I had years in which this helped more then forcing deep and regular breathing...

 

if this doesn't fit for you, - no problem. Here comes a hug

 

Thank you, Marigold.

 

I appreciate the advice, but my problem isn't feeling as though I have to control my breathing.. I know my body is very capable of doing this on it's own, as displayed by moments when I am distracted and when I am sleeping.. My problem is, when my mind is idle, I can't seem to STOP controlling my breathing. This isn't something that I want to do, it just seems like it has become a habit, or I am just stuck in an anxious state.

 

It reminds me a lot of social anxiety.. When I am in an anxious environment or moment, I do notice these same symptoms and my breathing becomes uncomfortable and forced.. But after the situation, it usually just goes away and it's not something that I tend to fixate on.. But right now, during this wave, EVERY SINGLE THOUGHT IS STICKY.. And it drives me insane. I'm not used to my thought process being like this and becoming afraid of everything. I have to avoid reading symptoms and weird fears that other people have, because my brain latches on and obsesses over things I have never even thought of before.

 

 

---

 

In my 6 week window, this did not happen.. Sure, I would have anxious thoughts, as everyone does.. But it was easy to analyze them and dismiss them. They weren't sticky and they didn't make me obsess like I am right now. This just isn't the person that I am used to being. But anxiety always leaves room for doubt.

[[Ar...]]

I have the same thing man...it's bad air hunger. I have had it off and on for the whole duration of my taper...and now that I've jumped it's come back again and messing with my sleep...again. When it is really strong it's all you can think about...your brain is hyper focusing on it.

 

Meditation, yoga, accupressure points and smaller meals (not as full stomach pressing the diaphram) all seem to really help me. Also..getting very busy paying bills...cleaning..doing a project..working..or even worrying about something else can make it "tone down" quite a bit as well. Reading a book at night helps you tone it down too, even allowing you to fall asleep after a few hours usually.but not always. Hope some of this helps, it's what I use to fight this..air hunger blows. (Pardon the pun)

[[Ch...]]

I have the same symptom and yes, it sucks. I do manage to cope with it much, much better than I used to. Distraction is my coping tool, too, and sometimes 4-7-8 breathing if I'm also feeling anxious. If you have any hobbies, now is the time to dive into one of them, even if you don't feel like it. I've spent the last 16 months (minus winter; it's cold as hell in Illinois) working outside in the garden and doing different landscaping projects. Consequently, during the day I don't notice the shortness of breath too much. In the evening I play cards with my Mom or work on a craft project. Evenings are worse for me so distraction is more difficult, but I manage well most of the time. Apparently this symptom is common with clonazepam. Know you are not alone in this and that it will eventually go away. Before my setback it had lessened quite a bit. I believe it will finally fade one of these days.

[[Sp...]]

Interesting, I have just recently started having breathing issues, shallow breathing and tight chest with thumping heart mainly at night but it happened during a meeting the other day when I was very tense, along with the breathing difficulty, or perceived difficulty, I had dizziness......very frightening.....I am in my 18th month after cold turkey from Valium and 40 years usage off and on.

[[Li...]]

Thank you for the advice.

 

Did not know that it was air hunger causing me to feel like I need to constantly breathe in and out.. I seem to wake up with it even, controlling my breath before I even have time to think about it, almost like it's a stuck habit now. Anyone else?

[[Ch...]]

I have had air hunger, where I'm unable to breathe deep easily, but I've also just felt like my chest is heavy and breathing takes more effort. I've been to the doctor and they found nothing, so it's definitely withdrawal. I'm not always anxious, either. It was a lot better before my setback and it'll go away eventually. Tomorrow would be nice...

[[Ar...]]

It WILL go away eventually Liveaboveit. The less you think about it..the more often it will tone down and eventually disappear all together. If it comes back (which it might) just keep doing the same thing, rinse, repeat. Also tilting your chin back and cocking your head to one side as you take a breath helps clear tolhe airway..or at least it feels like it to me...try that everyone in awhile if it gets too crazy or you feel like you can't breathe.Either way...it will pass, and eventually go away forever....that's what everyone who has had it says. Mine goes away as well, comes back eventually but goes away again. I look forward to the day when it goes away and stays gone, until then I'm stuck with it and it's stuck with me. It sucks but what ya gonna do? More air jokes. 

[[pu...]]

I'm often in the same boat.

 

What I find helps is if I run or jog as fast as can. I do this til I am exhausted. By doing this the body takes over your mind, and you fall into a more natural pattern, at least for a little while.

[[Ma...]]

Breathing problems have been my worst symptom. I feel like my body forgets to breath sometimes. Then I focus on making myself breath and it gets all screwed up. Other times I feel like I'm not getting enough oxygen. Which causes dizziness.

[[Li...]]

Yeah, I can relate to all of that.. Mine seems to be all day, though. I just can't distract away from it, no matter how much I try to just accept it and repeat the mantra that it will pass.. I do have small moments where I can forget about it, but this only lasts moments, as this chemical anxiety is always there.

 

I have had this in the past both while starting medication and during withdrawals. Each time, it inevitably goes away. But I made the mistake of reading about people that have this issue or develop it through stress, not in withdrawal, and some of them are stuck focusing and controlling their breathing for 4-10 years. This immediately frightened me and made me feel like it's never going to go away.

[[Ar...]]

You are not them, it will go away, you just have let time pass...healing takes time. I am 8 days free from Ativan and I still get it off and on, but if I try really hard not to think about it it can go away(at least for now) If it comes back worse again, I know I'll just have to patiently ride it out again for another month or so until it either goes away or comes back mildly like it is now. Either way, it's not permanent. We messed up our CNS taking benzos, that's what is wrong with us, if you have pain, it's probably due to wd not cancer. Depression? Wd, not psychosis. Insomnia? Wd not fatal fatigue.

 

It's is very easy to think that these symptoms are permanent and much more serious that they actually are...this is usually caused by health anxiety..which is also (you guessed it) caused by withdrawal.

[[Li...]]

Thanks Arty, I appreciate the support, my friend. Unfortunately, I haven't much of a break from it. I mean, I guess that's not true.. I constantly distract away from it and forget about it, but haven't managed to do so for more than a few minutes to half an hour, but it always remains in some shape or form. I'm looking forward to being free of it.. The strange thing is, it feels like I have it even when I'm not feeling very anxious.. Just focused on controlling the breathing and I get irritated and try to distract. Luckily though, it is no longer affecting my sleep all that much.

[[Gr...]]

Hey Live- have you tried breathing into a paper bag?  This had worked for me when it was at its worst.

[[Li...]]

Hey GreenCup,

 

I haven't really needed to, if that makes any sense. Doing decently well at controlling the anxiety, just exhausted because it feels like my body forgot how to breathe on it's own. I know this isn't true, but it's really obnoxious to have to control every breath. I'm just doing things and distracting, waiting for my body to go back to normal. Not really sure what else to do. Luckily, it isn't affecting my sleep.. But I literally wake up with it and it drives me insane. I just.. wake up, controlling my breathing. But clearly my body takes over when I am sleeping, so I have no idea, lol.

[[Gr...]]

Oh wow.  Kudos to you for keeping the anxiety at bay.  I know it's really crazy.  It's very hard to will this one away.  Mine went away but I had it for so long. 

 

I think you are right to make friends with your crazy behavior and not let it make you more anxious.  I wish you many moments free of breath controlling! 

[[Li...]]

Haha, it's so funny that you said that today.. I've had the WORST day today.. Normally I am just upset that I am controlling my breathing, but today actually felt like I was having trouble breathing in general.. I could feel myself tensing my chest and stomach, which was making it feel even more difficult.. The anxiety actually increased, which caused me to breathe faster/more deeply than usual and I couldn't seem to slow it down, so I tried to just endure it. I had to remind myself that it doesn't matter HOW I breathe, that my body will correct itself if it needs to, because I found myself constantly tensing/adjusting my breathing to avoid any issues which I think only perpetuated it.

 

When you had this issue, did you ever notice it just randomly get worse at times for no reason? I have this issue, especially at night.. Certain moments, I feel remarkably calm about it and I'm able to just deal and live with it.. Other moments, I feel like I can't possibly bare it and I go nuts, my mental state just changes.. And then, at certain times, I'll just notice my breathing go kinda wonky on it's own, it starts to feel more difficult to breathe or I'll notice that I'm just suddenly breathing faster/more deeply.. It's such a strange thing to deal with.

[[Ch...]]

LiveAboveIt, your description is pretty good. I've had this symptom for a long time. It's one of the symptoms that told me I was having problems with clonazepam and that I needed to get off of it. I've had it go almost completely away. It came back pretty bad during my setback and I still have bad days. I distract, too. Have you also tried mindfulness exercises or 4-7-8 breathing? When it's really bad and there's an anxiety component I've found that they can help some. Contrary to what I've heard others say, the breathing issues don't always occur because of anxiety. I think most of it is muscle/vagus nerve issues and anxiety just exacerbates it. Just remind yourself that all this will go away at some point. I have to do the same for myself all the time.