Indecision

[[gi...]]

Hi Everybody,

 

Has anyone experienced indecision during benzo withdrawal?  And I don't mean making big decisions, I'm talking small daily stuff.  Sometimes I can't make a simple decision, like should I go jogging in the morning or in the afternoon?  Should I do the laundry today or tomorrow?  Damn it!  I get anxious when that happens and feel stock.  What can be done about it?  Anyone?

[[Hu...]]

Hi I do this all the time. It also comes with extreme overthinking. Take laundry for example. When I finally pick a task and focus only on it I go through this elaborate plan of the steps it takes even before I begin. What soap do I use whites or colors or darks first? Should I seperate first or just grab the darks out as I go. Lots of times I just end up not doing it. One trick I did learn was write three things down I want to accomplish and pick one stick to it and TRY to block the other stuff out. Simple right but easier said then done Keep trying it will come.

[[Sa...]]

OMG! You have described me to a T! I think it goes along with all the cognitive stuff. I can't do logistics, either-- If it's something more complicated than one trip out and back (vs. pick up daughter at bus stop, drop off books at library, and then get gas- I wouldn't remember what I was supposed to do in what order!)

 

I also can't get started on doing something sometimes, because I'm paralyzed by the overwhelming amount of processing it requires to think ahead, so I get confused and frustrated (which of course makes everything worse.) Does this happen to you too?

[[Ni...]]

Decisions were the bane of my life and each poster here has well articulated various elements of it - particularly the feeling of lack of "processing power" and overthinking. Inability to decide - absolute mental fatigue - was one of the first indications that anything was wrong, for me.

 

Early on in withdrawal, serious problems arose over small, irrelevant stuff - e.g. being asked by someone else to choose between bread or toast; That would set off an alarming cascade of thoughts about thoughts - overload - made infinitely more frustrating by the asker saying something in retort like "Jeez, I only asked you if you'd like toast"...

 

This has improved a lot and 'little things' no longer have the same effect, but I'm still stuck on the bigger, more relevant, more important things. (Like what will we do for money).

 

A very big feature in this withdrawal experience was losing "executive control" of my thinking process - unable, for instance, to "bat away the (obvious) bullshit" of intrusive thoughts or to steer my thought processes or to arrive at conclusions. No doubt it is all connected.

 

And I'm sorry to say that I think 'time', is the answer here too - though I feel a return to regular, high-quality sleep would make an enormous difference.