Help. ZERO willpower here

[[ti...]]

I was doing so great then earlier this summer I realised that tolerance was gone. Actually having the clonazepam WORK to put me to sleep has been too tempting. There are always reasons, the fast I has to do, the vacation I didn't want spoiled, doggy medical emergency, etc

I notice about 8 days after a "splurge" I feel worse. I think this is why I can't jump. Just talking . 06 per day. I think it was 5 times doing a whole pill.

Sleep has never come back completely, I still wake up every hour when I sleep, but heck there are times I want better than that.

Have I totally messed this up?

[[me...]]

So do you feel that the jump was premature? I'm confused. I suggest making a plan to jump, putting out the (tiny) doses for that time period (not too long from now) and then putting the rest of the pills somewhere that is HARD to get to. Suggestions--a safe deposit box, or enlist the aid of someone to hold it for you, so you have to ask for it. Or if you feel fairly confident, take it to the pharmacy and get rid of it.

 

If you have it around, there will always be a time when you feel weak and will give in a take one. Been there, all it takes is a moments weakness. Once you've weathered a few storms without the crutch, you will feel a lot more confident that you can do it. And you can! A bad night of sleep won't kill you.

[[ti...]]

Well all my nights are bad

I think I had 3 good night's, where I slept four or five hours in a row without waking. Without the pill. So it's really hard to wait for that to happen on it's own. I know it takes time to heal. Even this broken sleep is more than I was getting while tolerant.

And I don't really know if I jumped prematurely or was just feeling the withdrawal from the rescue dose. .07 isn't an early jump is it? It's like crumbs of a pill. I have been .1 or lower all summer so I think I'm ready to jump. I just want to a couple weeks without the rescue dose to be sure.

Ya, maybe I need to give the pills to hubby so I don't fall back again

Thanks

[[me...]]

Remember that every time you rescue dose, it does set the insomnia healing back a lot. Your fractured sleep will slowly consolidate, but unfortunately it takes time.

 

If your husband is a strong man, not a pushover, that will work--that is what I did. I had him put them in his nightstand so there is no way I could sneak them without waking him (I'm only tempted in the middle of the night).

[[ti...]]

He just may throw them away

[[Gr...]]

Try something else to sleep.  I know benadryl isn't great for you but it's better than taking a benzo and messing up your taper. 

[[ti...]]

:-[i take many things for sleep. Mirtazapine, gabapentin, benadryl, a GNC supplement Alteril.  And Benadryl. I only take the mirtazapine every night, don't want to become dependant on anything else

Nothing works like the benzos