Had a PsyD appt yesterday

[[Ma...]]

So, my psychologist has been on Klonopin and Paxil before and tapered off both of these relatively easily compared to people here, and she is under the impression that I'm having a really hard time. She also seems to think that suffering during tapering is rare possibly. I really don't know. She has no history of a hard drug addiction though like me. Been using opioids on and off since 03. She looks like she has had a hard life though too. Just wonder sometimes if we are making this harder on ourselves. Probably but it would be hard either way. Even before I started posting on benzobuddies it was hard.  I feel bad for the people on the CT forums. Especially Maize. 

[[Ma...]]

I think it is time to do laundry. Haven't done it since May and I'm running out of clean clothes. Must of bought 40 pairs of underwear from Costco since May. I think I'm shattering records for not doing laundry.

[[Do...]]

Many people can get off benzos without too many issues, but this doesn't mean a small percentage of us don't suffer greatly.  Being a past addict doesn't necessarily mean anything.  I was actually told benzos were safe because I have a "non-addictive" personality.  Needless to say, my withdrawal was brutal. 

 

I also see people state that we make ourselves worse by expecting symptoms.  While this is true for some, it is not the case.  I had no idea benzo withdrawal could be severe.  My doctor told me to expect a week or two of insomnia and increased anxiety.  Within a week after cutting my dose in half, I had over 90% of the symptoms you see listed on wikipedia for benzo withdrawal.  (I chalked them up to being sleep deprived the first week, expecting them to go away in a week like the doctor said.  It wasn't until 2 weeks after cutting my dose that I googled klonopin withdrawal and realized I was screwed).

 

My new doctor said some people's nervous systems are just unstable, making it extremely difficult for them to get off benzos.