Losing it

[[mo...]]

I inadvertently threw something away at the mall today, in a shoe store the size of a giant warehouse. The thing I threw away was (kind of) important. I realized that I threw it away about 5 hrs after we got back from the mall. I lost it. Crying, anxious. Couldn't get my head out of that "losing it" zone. My girlfriend finally realized if I didn't go back to the mall and dig through the big, huge trashcans at the shoe store, I'd remain a mess all night. We went back and dug through ALL OF THE TRASHCANS!  She's so kind and patient.

 

I didn't find the lost item but I needed the peace of mind that came with knowing I did everything I could. If I didn't do that, I'd have been up all night wondering, "what if...?". We had a good laugh about it afterward, but this is not a normal behavior for me. Digging through public trashcans...ruminating, ocd, basically acting nuts.

 

Just had to share a good old benzo-cut-induced moment of all around feeling very crazy. What kind of reckless things will I be doing as I get further down in this cut?!

[[Ca...]]

Thanks for that..!!

I know it must have been a fair ordeal at the time, but you took the steps to get through and move on, -even make some light of it..!!

Well done for your friend also...

 

-im sure you considered that it might still be at the shoe shop, or making its way to the "big" bins...

 

I wonder how well my mental picture relates..!!

 

Ummm... -sorry for your loss..!!