Jump to content
Please Check, and if Necessary, Update Your BB Account Email Address as a Matter of Urgency ×
New Forum: Celebrating 20 Years of Support - Everyone is Invited! ×
  • Please Donate

    Donate with PayPal button

    For nearly 20 years, BenzoBuddies has assisted thousands of people through benzodiazepine withdrawal. Help us reach and support more people in need. More about donations here.

Just not even sure this is withdrawal anymore


[50...]

Recommended Posts

[50...]
I truly feel I've been brain damaged and have no way to discern or be diagnosed. I really don't even know this is withdrawal anymore. I feel I'm in a constant other worldly domain where my brain doesn't even know what to do. I feel paralyzed every day with fear that binds me to my bed....I fear the symptoms; the odd taste on my tongue is the most troubling. I would accept dp/dr any day over this sensation...I just need help and reassurance; need to find relief...
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Convince yourself otherwise. Tell yourself that these are temporary side effects that many people suffer from when they stop taking benzos.

 

Not only is it true, but it will also make you feel better.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[50...]
Thank you benzobob...it's just so overwhelming being slammed with all the cognitive issues. It makes coping a million times harder. I just can't even hold on to reality much longer....feel I'm falling victim to this...
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this. I completely relate with you. The cognitive issues are the worst. I'm dealing with them every single day.

 

I truly wonder myself sometimes if I'm really in withdrawal. Maybe I just have a nasty mental disorder that needs meds...but I know meds are so horrible and would never take them ever again.

 

Try your best to be strong and know that this is just temporary and we will be back to ourselves sometime in the near future.  :smitten:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[50...]
Thank you Bhealthy...I'm just so discouraged; can't even imagine doing this again and again. I've developed a new symptom-this metallic, awful poison taste in my mouth...It's just maddening. I can't imagine this over and over...
Link to comment
Share on other sites

hardtocope,

 

We are rowing the same kind of boat.

 

I am hoping to change into a nice yacht soon.

 

I want one of those bigger ones that can handle the rough oceans, unlike the one in the Perfect Storm.

 

Haven't decided yet on the helicopter pad.

 

 

That keeps me going.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[50...]
Thank you benzobob...I wish I could share in your optimism. I so pray I come out of this unscathed. It has been a torturous ride that seemingly has no end. I'd opt for the yacht...
Link to comment
Share on other sites

hardtocope,

 

For me it turmoil - mixed in with intense sadness.

 

I cannot focus on anything for longer than a few seconds. Reading is especially hard. I look ahead of time to see how long the text is so that I can time my breaks. If it is way too long, I pick points to skim it.

 

I feel like my eyes zone out to the point that I am just gleaming a fraction of the inputs. My ears do the same with sound.

 

And I cannot feel my tongue most of the time.

 

Most of my muscles tense up for much of the day. <-- my new theory is that this is some sort of biological defense to protect against danger because awareness cannot properly identify the surroundings.

 

 

I, too, sometimes think about brain damage... that I will not get better because this is an organic issue.

 

I try to keep my eye on the finish line, otherwise I fear where my head will take me. It is more survival for me than anything else.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[50...]

I understand...It's so hard not to dwell where we are. I've never been so afraid in my life. I've lost so much already. I have that odd tongue feeling too; it's maddening...worst to me than the mental....I am finding it increasingly more and more difficult to make it through the days...there are no windows for me...

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think that tongue thing is related to thinking. When I feel more of my tongue I talk and think much more clearly.

 

I try to tell my self that I have 'fear' when it comes on. I think that when I let it take over without that particular awareness, that becomes more intense and lasts longer.

 

 

How have you been feeling overall? Do you feel like there are any trends?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[50...]
I've had the oddest trials...From the very start of taking the meds, I incurred trials. I was placed on K last April...no issues for a month; then once I learned it was a benzo, I returned to doctor for help getting off of it; he rx'd Lexapro-at first pill, I had issues...I believe I developed akathisia because I had horrific crying spells/agitation...I spent a year trying to get back to me...In February, I ct'd...have suffered dp/dr, high fears, agitation/crying, hurting hands, neuropathy, cold feet, odd brain symptoms, high anxiety, odd mouth/tongue sensations....just have been a mess. I really don't know what to do with myself every day-I mostly stay in bed, fearful and a prisoner to my symptoms...
Link to comment
Share on other sites

You are still at the beginning. You will start feeling an upward trend soon.

 

Yeah, I cold turkey-ed the first time. I still regret it. I had a hard time breathing and had yawns mixed in with sneezes. My doctor says that it sounded like a seizure.

 

Are you eating well?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[50...]
I'm probably not eating the most healthy; lately, I've had no appetite. The worrisome thing is that I've developed an odd aversion for water...I can't drink it so I'll probably end up being dehydrated...I try and force it down and usually it's at night...that's why I worry I have more going on b/c I have odd compulsions now...I'm so afraid.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Who's Online (See full list)

    • [Lo...]
    • [Gu...]
    • [Mo...]
    • [Bi...]
    • [Pi...]
    • [...]
    • [Jo...]
    • [Kr...]
    • [kn...]
    • [Tr...]
    • [Sa...]
    • [Ja...]
    • [Ta...]
    • [Wa...]
    • [co...]
    • [st...]
    • [Es...]
    • [be...]
    • [ra...]
    • [...]
    • [in...]
    • [Rh...]
    • [ca...]
    • [Ca...]
    • [El...]
    • [Bu...]
    • [Fa...]
    • [Fu...]
    • [In...]
    • [Sh...]
    • [Bu...]
    • [fr...]
    • [An...]
    • [Bl...]
    • [ne...]
×
×
  • Create New...