This WAVE doesnt want to let up!!!!

[[Ta...]]

Very frustrated and sad today.

 

Just when I thought this WAVE had decided to let up it's back today with a vengeance.

I'm trying to be kind to myself and reassuring but at times it becomes a bit overwhelming.

 

I can't believe at 12 months out I'm still suffering so much with these horrible dips.

 

Just wondering what you guys do to help you through these horrible days.

Looks like I'm back to hiding for a while and crying. It's such a lonely journey.

 

Tallow Love

:smitten: :smitten:

 

 

 

[[be...]]

Hi Tallow

 

Cheer up bud. It sounds like you are getting the switcher roos of good and bad days. Actually this is what happens for a while before the healing begins. Remember that this road is non linear and it makes no sense. Part of a benzos personality. I think you are just in the next phase of this crazyness but longer windows are coming. We have to hang on to hope. We have come so far. I am having the fear and cortisol awakenings too. I think you are on course for some relief very soon. We gotta hang in there though. I'm rootin for my 2 month older fellow travelor to start to turn a corner. 

 

The fact that you even had a window shows that your brain and nervous system are healing. What makes waiting for our healing so hard is the darn exaggeration of fear. I understand that. It feels so real and it is so scary but it is out of place as no lion is chasing us but our brain doesn't know that as it is screwed up and sick. Not damaged just sick.

[[Ta...]]

Thanks for your great reply beebop2.

 

You've cheered me up a little already. The words of hope encouragement can sometimes just get us back on the positive thinking track.  I just went a little bit "Walk about" this morning and have spent the afternoon working along side this instead of letting it freak me out.

 

The feeling of doom is so sickening and it makes it so hard to feel normal and comfortable in the body.  I feel like I have to have something to do all the time. I hope you're right and this will lift shortly and better days will be on the way.

 

I'm rootin for my two month traveller coming behind me to have better days soon and put that bloody lion back in its cage. If only we could lock the cage and throw away the key!!!

 

Wishing you a better week with SUNNY periods.

 

Tallow Love

:smitten: :smitten:

[[Ka...]]

Hi Tallow,would you believe it, l 'm on exactly the same route as you after 2week's of wave l felt better for a couple of day's then l crashed back into the bloody wave again but this time with a couple more symptoms, first one the burning tongue and the second and the worst is my feeling's toward's my beloved Husband he has alway's been my soul mate but this last few day's l feel so disconnected from him this is by far the worst symptom. I am hoping for us both that this will soon be over and we can get back to our lives as we used to know it surely this can't go on for much longer l'm hoping and praying that this year is going to get better than the first for both of us. I'm alway's here for you TL through good and bad day's hope you have good one's soon.Love KG

[[be...]]

Thanks for your great reply beebop2.

 

You've cheered me up a little already. The words of hope encouragement can sometimes just get us back on the positive thinking track.  I just went a little bit "Walk about" this morning and have spent the afternoon working along side this instead of letting it freak me out.

 

The feeling of doom is so sickening and it makes it so hard to feel normal and comfortable in the body.  I feel like I have to have something to do all the time. I hope you're right and this will lift shortly and better days will be on the way.

 

I'm rootin for my two month traveller coming behind me to have better days soon and put that bloody lion back in its cage. If only we could lock the cage and throw away the key!!!

 

Wishing you a better week with SUNNY periods.

 

Tallow Love

:smitten: :smitten:

 

 

You're welcome Tallow     

[[Wi...]]

Hi Tallow,would you believe it, l 'm on exactly the same route as you after 2week's of wave l felt better for a couple of day's then l crashed back into the bloody wave again but this time with a couple more symptoms, first one the burning tongue and the second and the worst is my feeling's toward's my beloved Husband he has alway's been my soul mate but this last few day's l feel so disconnected from him this is by far the worst symptom. I am hoping for us both that this will soon be over and we can get back to our lives as we used to know it surely this can't go on for much longer l'm hoping and praying that this year is going to get better than the first for both of us. I'm alway's here for you TL through good and bad day's hope you have good one's soon.Love KG

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hey katrina!

Im just curious. I see many peoples' signature say they were on "6 mg of valium" for many years. How can that be given valium doesnt come in a 6 nor 1 mg dose? THANKS!

[[Wi...]]

Hey beebop-

How do you quote a post without your reply being included in the big blue box along with the quote. Look at mine and your replies above. Your reply to the quote is outside the blue box whereas mine is within the blue box. How do you do that? Thanks! Ps-anyone else feel free to answer if beebop doesnt see this. Its driving me crazy.

[[tw...]]

Hey beebop-

How do you quote a post without your reply being included in the big blue box along with the quote. Look at mine and your replies above. Your reply to the quote is outside the blue box whereas mine is within the blue box. How do you do that? Thanks! Ps-anyone else feel free to answer if beebop doesnt see this. Its driving me crazy.

 

Just make sure you are under the very last quote in brackets, then hit "return" to start a new line, and it should work.

[[Wi...]]

Hey beebop-

How do you quote a post without your reply being included in the big blue box along with the quote. Look at mine and your replies above. Your reply to the quote is outside the blue box whereas mine is within the blue box. How do you do that? Thanks! Ps-anyone else feel free to answer if beebop doesnt see this. Its driving me crazy.

 

Just make sure you are under the very last quote in brackets, then hit "return" to start a new line, and it should work.

 

Testing testing one two three

[[Wi...]]

Wow. Thats how ive always done it yet it worked this time. Ur a magician. Thanks!

[[te...]]

Hi Tallow, sorry to hear you're in a bad wave. Hope you feel better soon. Sending you a big hug 

[[Je...]]

I am sorry you are in the midst of a bad wave. I am with you. Mine has been nonstop for 4.5 weeks. I just broke down crying and decided to come in and try to cheer someone else up. So I will tell you what I keep telling myself...this won't last. It hasn't always been this bad and it won't stay that way. Praying we all get relief.

[[ld...]]

Hang tough

 

  You are going to be okay. I have been in the worst wave yet...and I am nearing 14 months out. This new wave started in January 2017 and have been in this wave up to this present day...but...for the last three weeks I have been getting a window for a day and a night each week...just one window for each week and then dip right back with a wave for the rest of the week. I will have to say this is a mind blowing experience! This week started the same, woke up on Monday feeling totally normal...awesome...all symptoms gone... again...but this time when I woke up on Tuesday surprise!...still feeling awesome today. I don't know...this is just happening this way for me. This is a sign...and a good one. We are recovering. Just one day at a time. We will get there. You will recover. Stay strong! When this is all over you will be stronger than before. 

 

    ldm27

[[Ta...]]

HI KatrinaG, Tgirl, Jenn13 and Idm27.

 

Thanks for all your encouraging words.  At the moment it's a nightmare!!! Yesterday I thought I had turned the corner after 3 weeks of ups and downs and today after lunch I hit a wall again.  WTF is all I can say.  How are we supposed to live a normal life.  Making plans is non existent for me and I really struggle with this.  How long do we put a hold on our lives?  I've never experienced such a vast change in days throughout this whole ordeal until now. It's so draining and I'm finding it really hard to stay positive as there are not many okay days.

When I was in month 8 and 9 I had two week breaks where things weren't to bad.  I remember thinking to myself if this is how it continues I'll be able to get through this no worries. I haven't had a real good reasonable day for 3 months now and I'm slowly loosing heart. 

I thought being this far out that there would be more good days but I can't find them.  I feel so lost and scared. This crying is getting out of control.

I don't even try and explain this to people as its to big to comprehend!!! You have to live it to really know the pain.

I know I'm not the only one struggling and that probably gives me some comfort that this is all normal progress at this time and things will improve.  I'm praying this is true.

Stay strong everyone.

Sorry for the rant but I've had enough at the moment. I have to find my inner peace again.

Love

Tallow

:smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

[[ld...]]

Tallow

 

    There is a post that you might like to read here on benzobuddies it's called What is happening in your brain: by Parker

 

This is some interesting information and can really give you a another perspective concerning our symptoms.

 

     

[[Tr...]]

I'm sorry you are in a wave. I am in a wave too. It has been almost 2 weeks and feeling terrible. Its hard I know. But it will improve. This has been a long wave for me. Before only a few days, now its almost 2 weeks and doesn't let up.

 

I know how it feels. hope you and i feel better soon.

 

tracy

[[Vi...]]

Hi, TL, sorry for your bad waves. I feel your pain. I'm 10 months out and don't have a real window yet. But some morning I feel much better and bam back to suffering by afternoon. Over all less anxiety less burning pain in my head, sleep getting better too. But still every day is a suffering but less intense than before. I'm not crying every day now.

What is helping me is a hot bath and exercise when I can. Even a nice walk outside can help lift up your spirits.

Hope for nice long window for you and for myself too and all BB here.

Hugs and healing

[[Ta...]]

Wow! wow! wow!

What would I do without all you beautiful comforting people.

Your kind words Idm27, TracyNGLE and Vicca55 are very precious to me.

I'm still all over the place.  I'm trying my hardest to stay strong and be kind to myself.

This is the longest wave and up and down time since acute.  I really am at a loss!!!  This is

insane after being 12 months

Just wondering how I find that post by Parker - What is happening in your brain.

Is there a QUICK WAY TO FIND IT?

 

Tallow Love

:smitten: :smitten:

 

[[be...]]

Wow! wow! wow!

What would I do without all you beautiful comforting people.

Your kind words Idm27, TracyNGLE and Vicca55 are very precious to me.

I'm still all over the place.  I'm trying my hardest to stay strong and be kind to myself.

This is the longest wave and up and down time since acute.  I really am at a loss!!!  This is

insane after being 12 months

Just wondering how I find that post by Parker - What is happening in your brain.

Is there a QUICK WAY TO FIND IT?

 

Tallow Love

:smitten: :smitten:

 

 

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=66397.0

[[Ta...]]

THANKS SO MUCH BEEBOP2.

JUST MADE MYSELF A CUPPA AND SETTLING IN FOR A BIG READ.

TALLOW

:smitten:

[[Je...]]

I hope you are feeling a little relief at least from the wave. I am in a horrible wave still. I think that some of us must hit these hard points as our brain heals. I am still not able to function. I hope that we are all healed soon and just wanted to check in with you. Feel much better and be kind to yourself amuntil you do.

[[Re...]]

Like a fool I thought I was free and I've been in a wave that keeps getting worse day by day since Wednesday.  I know stress is terrible for us but it's so hard to avoid it when I must work to support my family.  It's hard to believe that only 3 months ago I only had insomnia and some depression which started this whole disaster...... Keep on being strong Jenn, Tallow, beebop, vica, tracy, Idm .... and all you beautiful people.

[[pa...]]

I am in the same situation.  I am just short of 1 year jumped off Xanax.  I recently went through a wonderful window which lasted about a week, and then bam like a freight train hitting me, I am in the throes of a bad wave.  Extreme anxiety panting like a dog.

[[Ta...]]

Hi Jenn13, Realslimtaper and Patsal.

 

Looks like we're all having a rough time at the moment.

 

I never thought it would get this hard again one year out but surprise surprise it does.

I hope you guys are having better days soon.

 

I've had about 4 weeks of this and I feel like I'm back in acute.

I've forgotten what a manageable day is like.

 

I wish with all my heart it comes soon for me and you guys as well.

as disgusting as it is we have to stay strong and hold on to hope.

 

Tallow Love

:smitten: :smitten:

[[Ma...]]

How is your wave looking?What symptoms do you have?

I am too in never ending wave.