Struggling at 1/2mg need encouragement

[[ro...]]

Hello buddies.

 

I am writing because I need both advice and some encouragement. I am at the 1/2 mg a day point in my taper off of diazepam. You can see my history in the signature lines below. During the process while never feeling perfect, I have had some window days or parts of days, but it seems at this point for the past couple weeks I have had more challenging days, almost like when I first discovered I was having trouble.

 

Right now I am lying in bed with a hot water bottle on my stomach and feeling sweaty, nauseous, very peculiar and strange. I have many of the symptoms that you all talk about, common ones being insomnia, sweating (in fact I started sweating within five or 10 minutes of taking my daily dose a little while ago), nausea that comes and goes, and list goes on. I am usually able to function during the day, esp afternoon and after dinner,  and get the things I have to done, I don't work, and I am pretty home bound, with agoraphobia, only able to go for a walk with the dog and most weeks to pick up the groceries which I order online. I haven't been out anywhere in months, only once or twice to church in  all this time.

 

It seems to be getting more challenging these past couple weeks. This intensifying of symptoms, is this a normal thing when you get to lower doses in the taper, does this mean that I should hold where I am for a while? As it is I'm only reducing 1/2 a milliliter (ml, not mg) and holding that for two days then reducing again etc. Doing a slow daily taper. Is this too slow? At this rate I'll be going at this until after the summer and that just seems too long. Especially if symptoms are going to stay this way whether I taper fast or slow .

 

Thanks for reading all of this. Any suggestions would be much appreciated. Hope everyone else is doing as well as can be expected.

 

[[Ca...]]

That has been my experience as well - the lower I went for a while the more I felt the cuts. I am down to 2.14 ml V a day, and after the usual ok 8 days am experiencing some of what you describe - nausea and sweating, and distinct sadness. I am working and functioning pretty well (though not compared to most 'normal' people) so I guess I can't complain - so many people here are struggling so horribly - but I am realizing it is going to take me a very long time to get fully off this stuff.

[[ro...]]

Thanks for the reply Cally, I am doing the liquid taper rather than cuts, so you get a stretch of good days doing cuts, that sounds nice. In my case with liquid I can never predict how a day will be, but they have definitely intensified. Glad you can work. It amazes me that I took such a low dose and can feel so bad and have had to work so hard...maybe because it was prescribed for decades.

[[Ca...]]

I'm doing the liquid taper as well. That way I can cut by 1/100 of a ml

[[be...]]

I agree with Valium. I think the roughest part is at the meager end. But hey, look at it this way, you are doing liquid so you can change readily and you are nearly off and benzo free! I wish I were in your shoes, as I still have 31 mg to drop. I think once you are off you'll start to feel better. I hope so and the best of luck to you.

 

Bets

[[ro...]]

Thanks BenzoGirl. It is really a rough day today...much more than usual. I just wish I knew what to do. hold, keep going, or what. I am not usually in bed almost all day like today. The thing that is hard is that it seemed until a week or so ago like I was improving as I went down.

[[be...]]

Thanks BenzoGirl. It is really a rough day today...much more than usual. I just wish I knew what to do. hold, keep going, or what. I am not usually in bed almost all day like today. The thing that is hard is that it seemed until a week or so ago like I was improving as I went down.

 

Are you bedridden because if your symptoms or do you have that fatigue that I get once in a while? I hate that fatigued feeling. Even though I sleep a lot but I think it's a wasted day on my part.

 

Betsy

[[ro...]]

With symptoms, sweating, feeling odd, dizzy walking around, burning skin across chest, indigestion, in the bathroom often. Fearful because of feeling this way. Have had this mildly more than usual this week but this isn't going away.

[[be...]]

Perhaps it will. One week is nothing in benzoland......................

[[ro...]]

Today things are a bit better. Still feeling symptoms but better than yesterday. I took .5 mg again to see if holding will help. Maybe things are getting more challenging due to lower dose. Wish I didn't feel like I was experimenting on myself. But for now, thankful for a somewhat better day.

[[Ta...]]

I'm glad you're feeling better today, and congratulations for getting so far along in your taper.

 

When I got to the point you're at now, I needed to hold my dose pretty steady for a while, and then when I started my taper again, I did it in minuscule amounts. (And I would hold my dose whenever I needed to.) Another thing that helped (and only do this if it sounds right for you because I know everyones body works very differently) was to take a little more than usual, but only for a day. That would help all my withdrawal symptoms feel manageable and somehow, just knowing I had permission to increase my dose as needed really helped. My previous tapers (twice) were derailed because I was adamant about not increasing my dose EVER for any reason. That lead to a lot of frustration, and this time around has been much better because I could go up again at any time for 24 hours.

 

Whatever you end up doing, I hope you find something that works for you. This is a difficult journey, and please know you're not alone.

[[ro...]]

Thank you TaPer...I am holding at .5 for the 4th day now. This is with diazepam...looks like you tapered klonopin...I guess either way we have to do the same things. It is hard for me to figure out how much to taper now. I know the formula but my brain is having a hard time calculating.

[[Be...]]

Thank you TaPer...I am holding at .5 for the 4th day now. This is with diazepam...looks like you tapered klonopin...I guess either way we have to do the same things. It is hard for me to figure out how much to taper now. I know the formula but my brain is having a hard time calculating.

 

If you look at my sig, I did the .25 cuts of V till I jumped. You can try a smaller cut from here on and see if it helps.

[[ro...]]

Thanks for the reply, BeatBenzos. So you did cut and hold and not taper? I am doing liquid taper and think what I'm doing looks slower than your rate by a good bit. I guess I keep thinking if I hold symptoms will get better, maybe I am wrong about that at this low dose. Confused about what rate to go.