Questions on acceptance

[[Tr...]]

When I post on Benzo Buddies when I am in a big wave does this mean I am not TOTALLY acceptance with my withdrawals? I read in Claire Weekes book that, a patient said he accepted for a week and the syptom of his anxiety still there, and he complained to Dr. Weekes. She told  him that he did not 'FULLY' accept. If he did he would not complain? Am I in these cases? I feel like posting on Benzo Buddies because I feel more relief when I reach out to people who REALLY understand then keeping inside of myself...it makes me feel better....Whenever I have a wave, I post and then I feel better...not because the waves get better but I feel relief...I reach for reasurance....I just want to understand...about acceptance...I think I have totally accepted this thing and learning to accept..I have tried my best....I do not complain much to my fiance anymore...once in a while...Please advice...

 

Tracy

[[do...]]

Don't give yourself such a hard time. I don't think there's such thing as FULLY accepting benzo WD in acute or when you're in a wave. You can only accept it as best as you can one moment and the moment after.

 

I think Dr. Weekes' book needs to be taken not so literally by us (benzo survivors). We're not dealing with typical anxiety or panic. If the latest research (that I've read) is correct, the calcium channels on our neurons are incredibly up-regulated, and since calcium is one of the things that causes neurons to fire, our poor neurons are firing left, right and centre - 24/7. Don't quote me on this. A scientist, I am not 

 

But, what I'm trying to say is there's a physical reason for our psychological states that goes beyond the current understanding of anxiety, depression, panic, etc.

 

I love Dr. Weekes' book and it's helping me, but I'm at a point where I'm able to practice what she says. A few months ago? Nope. I just wouldn't have been able to. In acute? Nope. I would have burnt the book and cursed her name 

 

Be good to yourself. You'll heal 

[[Ch...]]

Getting reassurance provides some relief for anxiety which can lead to a lessening of symptoms for awhile.  I've seen this happen countless times.  It's easy to amp up with anxiety during this process, then muscles tighten up and body anxiety increases. 

 

I don't see acceptance as being linked with needing reassurance, although acceptance of the withdrawal process, especially how long it takes to feel better, is certainly a benefit.

[[Tr...]]

Don't give yourself such a hard time. I don't think there's such thing as FULLY accepting benzo WD in acute or when you're in a wave. You can only accept it as best as you can one moment and the moment after.

 

I think Dr. Weekes' book needs to be taken not so literally by us (benzo survivors). We're not dealing with typical anxiety or panic. If the latest research (that I've read) is correct, the calcium channels on our neurons are incredibly up-regulated, and since calcium is one of the things that causes neurons to fire, our poor neurons are firing left, right and centre - 24/7. Don't quote me on this. A scientist, I am not 

 

But, what I'm trying to say is there's a physical reason for our psychological states that goes beyond the current understanding of anxiety, depression, panic, etc.

 

I love Dr. Weekes' book and it's helping me, but I'm at a point where I'm able to practice what she says. A few months ago? Nope. I just wouldn't have been able to. In acute? Nope. I would have burnt the book and cursed her name 

 

Be good to yourself. You'll heal 

 

Hi there. Thank you for the post. This makes me feel so much better. Also thank you for reminding that I need to not give myself a hard time. With this, I think I am doing extremely well handling these wd benzo waves. I am able to work and do things I normally do as I was not in withdrawal. So I guess I am making progress and seems to be hard to myself at time and thinking I am not healing but the fact is I am. Okay, so next time if I have any negative thoughts about myself or putting myself down,I would need to work on those. Everything will be OK for me. I will heal. Everyone will heal. Time is what it takes. 

[[Tr...]]

Getting reassurance provides some relief for anxiety which can lead to a lessening of symptoms for awhile.  I've seen this happen countless times.  It's easy to amp up with anxiety during this process, then muscles tighten up and body anxiety increases. 

 

I don't see acceptance as being linked with needing reassurance, although acceptance of the withdrawal process, especially how long it takes to feel better, is certainly a benefit.

 

I also read somewhere or even my psychologist mentioned...That getting reassurance many times might make someone lack of confidence. She said I asked her for so many reassurance, meaning getting a confirmation that everything is OK. She diddn't say its bad but suggests that I work toward for trusting myself more. It's just hard when we are in this wd...I am naturally not a confident person, yet a lone going through this. 

 

If I am asking and sharing how many months I have off the drugs or counting the days...does this mean I don't totally accept the withdrawal process...Well it is very difficult to accept since this is horrible when in a waves...IF I try not to talk about it...meaning I would hold inside, and that would increase more tensions...

 

Tracy

[[Ch...]]

I'm not a health professional, just giving my opinion... but it seems to be pretty common to need reassurance that we're going to be okay, that symptoms are 'normal', etc.  I don't think it is practical to expect someone to work towards trusting oneself more.  Our emotions are too difficult to control during this process.  Mind over matter is not terribly helpful for most of us right now.

 

Personally, rather than counting days and months, I'd refer to this description of the healing stages.  We go through these at different rates and also go back and forth between the stages mentioned:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=156111.0

[[ca...]]

To me, whether I accept or not doesn't change the fact that I am having withdrawal symptoms. I have accepted that this will take time but it doesn't make me feel better. Knowing what to expect helps me deal with my symptoms. Benzo Buddies has been a lifesaver. Talking with others that have or are going through the same thing I experience has enlightened me about the process of withdrawal and healing. Doctors don't tell you! You are pushed out the door or told that you need more meds.

[[of...]]

Acceptance in my opinion is when you have the realization that this is the way that things are and there's nothing you can do about it. You have to truly be at peace with the fact that your going to be running on 50% for a long time. When you quit giving your mental energy to worry and thought, you find some headspace and that's where you find peace. Imo

[[Tr...]]

Thank you so much everyone for all the good responses. I was just trying to make sure I am on the right track of acceptance, that's all. Naturally I am a very impatient and sensitive person so I am really struggling and always have been struggling with enduring pain, any kind of pain. I am not good at. So this has been very difficult for me and I know for others too.

 

Tracy