Is it more than anxiety?!

[[Ma...]]

I'm a new poster to the forum but I have been reading posts since I CT off klonopin back June 2016( 8 months ago ).  Quick history - 3 years of .5mg of Klonopin(1-2x daily) for anxiety. Then last three  months I would take either the klonopin or 1mg of Ativan.Then I quit. I wasn't aware or advised on withdrawals or severity of cold turkey.  I went through the horrendous withdrawls for several months then had a few windows around 5 to 6 months then my stepfather passed away at Christmas and ever since then I've had a very tough time.  Most of the physical symptoms have eased up and are manageable however the mental symptoms are still very tough to deal with and I am discouraged because I was feeling hopeful before my stepfathers death but since his death my mental symptoms are terrible and almost unbearable.  Very high anxiety,  intrusive thoughts, obsessive thoughts, bad concentration, nightmares, blurry vision,  hopelessness, major depression, dp/dr,  suicidal thoughts(no actions) etc. I have obsessive thoughts that I must have more serious mental illness like  psychosis or schizophrenia. I have a terrible time shaken these thoughts. Is this common at 8 months off a cold withdrawal? Isn't the dose I was taking a low dose so am I supposed to be experiencing such harsh mental symptoms? Also, I have conversations in my mind with people I know in my head, I know they aren't there and I don't speak to them aloud, it's like I'm thinking or practicing, I think about what we might talk about if they were around...is that psycho or the that part of my loneliness or anxiety? My therapist thinks I'm okay but i feel better after seeing her but a day or so later my mind will start doubting her and go back to thinking I'm seriously mentally ill. Please my benzo warriors, help your sister out... let me know what you think.

Mappin

[[4G...]]

Mall in, I don't have the answer to your problems (I wish I did! I'd be a millionaire!) But I hate to see questions going unanswered as if nobody cared. So here I am!

 

I'm sure most of the people on here who have come off these tablets, especially c/t, would say that these are normal w/d symptoms and will go in time. In fact, I've been on here long enough to know that they would say that.

 

What to do for now though, when you feel like a crazy woman? Unfortunately, just stick it out. I know, I know, it's crap. But you have entered the Twilight Zone, where waiting and time are everything!

 

If you are desperate, go to A&E (UK) or ER (US). You must try to keep yourself safe. Otherwise, just take time.

 

Good luck. And be kind to yourself. xxx

[[4G...]]

Sorry, Mappin, my spellchecker is a pain!  Gxxx