DUH!!! I just realized that I have "lost" one bad sx over the last year of taper

[[db...]]

Hi All,

I have been so obsessed about this taper I am on that I both feel like I should "hurry up" and then think I should just hold, hope that somehow I may find a lowered dose that I can live with and am sometimes tempted to updose/reinstate. Talk about double/multiple minded thinking.

 

This time I have dropped 1 mg out of 3 mgs in about a year with every kind of good and bad days (mostly) but variable on other stressors. This after nearly 25 years of prescribed use with only one taper off in 2000 for nearly a year. I was forced to reinstate in order to get HCV meds as that chemo combo causes major anxiety and other awful sxs. Fortunately, I was able to complete my treatment which is still considered successful 17 years later (undetectable), but, I have not even tried to taper off again as I had meds stolen and otherwise "unavailable" for up to a week and gladly reinstated.

 

Anyway, back to subject, I just realized that I have not had one incidence of "tongue-biting" since beginning this taper. I used to regularly jump up in bed after my teeth snapped shut on my tongue causing great pain (I think these were mini-seizures of some sort). I really did damage to my tongue many times.

 

So, even though I have plenty of sxs still, I just realized this improvement. Dr Breggin states that we become so accustomed to many sxs that we just accept them. He calls this medication spell binding. We are not always the best judge on how we are doing when symptoms flare.

 

So, this "revelation" has re-ignited my hope of getting better. I am 65 and have other real issues so can get very depressed at times thinking I may feel like this until my passing day.

 

I can hardly believe my cog-fog is so thick that I didn't realize this months ago as a plus as the tongue biting was an excruciating and scary seizure-type activity.

 

I just thought I'd share as I read others that are between a rock and a hard place in deciding how to deal with this medically induced problem. I hope this makes others search their life and inventory both bad and GOOD changes no matter how small and try to work "gratefulness" into their taper even on bad days. I mean we are alive and that is one big thing to be grateful for if nothing else. Also, most of us can function somewhat a part of the time when there are others that are paralyzed or otherwise even more grossly debilitated.

 

I am grateful I am not biting my tongue anymore. It shows me that even less is better than where I was.

 

Thanks for reading. Good luck and peace to all of us no matter their sxs as if we can stay the course we will improve.

 

[[be...]]

What a great thing to lose

[[Ca...]]

Well put...

 

Well, I searched my memory... -but i couldnt find it...!!!

 

All the best...

 

[[be...]]

Well put and it reinforces to me once again that our sxs are temporary no matter what they are. We often let them define who we are. To such an extent we end up falsely scaring ourselves or actually let them define us. If one gets lost terrific. All will pass if we just let them.  B

[[An...]]

Well put and it reinforces to me once again that our sxs are temporary no matter what they are. We often let them define who we are. To such an extent we end up falsely scaring ourselves or actually let them define us. If one gets lost terrific. All will pass if we just let them.  B

:thumbsup: