After 6 months of WD and ok sleep I got kicked with horror insomnia.

[[Ma...]]

So I was thinking I am one of those people that will not have a horrible problem with sleeping WD because I was sleeping relatively ok with few days in months with nights of 2-3 hours sleeping.Insomnia was a reason why I took xanax in first place.

Now when my WD is getting better i got kicked with insomnia.It started strange.With 10 days of sleeping 5 till 6 hours.Woking up always in 5.30 and not being able to sleep till 24.Than I got kicked with 2 days of sleeping just 1-2 hours.I am scared it will now continue like last year when I started to take xanax.Is this normal 6 months out and what can I do?Sleeping hypnoses was helping but nit anymore as well as sleeping hygiene.This was helping very much.

Thanks

[[te...]]

Will wait to see what others have to say, I don't have experience with xanax so I can't speak to that as much, and my sleep crap hit right away so I'm different in that respect too. It could be you are just in some kind of wave and it will pass with even more improvements. And sometimes stuff happens in life that we don't realize how much of an impact it has and it affects sleep since we are still sensitive while in recovery. Healing isn't linear and sometimes there are steps backwards but it will stabilize and move forwards again. Hope you are okay, we all have been there and understand the experience!!

[[Ma...]]

Thank you for answering.i really hope it is just a wave.I hope i will not get this horror of not sleeping for monthes like i did when taking xanax.

Nothing helps in moment for insomnia.Physical activity do not help ever or meditation but sleeping hypnose did help and now not at all.

[[me...]]

I think it is very possible that you will have a good night tonight. I still have a pattern of one or two bad nights now and then. Try not to worry too much, and find some activity to keep you busy. You might want to knock off the caffeine and other stimulants for now, if you use them.

[[...]]

HI there, perhaps this will help to some degree. It was something i posted a while back. Might explain some of your insomnia - it certainly does for me.

 

HI all,

 

For all of you (including me) suffering insomnia (due to benzo's or not) this source might help:

 

https://thesleepschool.org/

 

Dr Guy Meadows talks about how some of insomnia is fear based, ie the more anxious we are about not sleeping the less we tend to sleep and advocates accepting your insomnia as a way to improve it. Essentially you have to learn to not give a dam because the more you worry/obsess about sleep the more you put it up on a pedestal and the more pressure you put on yourself to sleep (which means less sleep). Your struggle against insomnia just makes it worse so you have to give up the struggle. The method is by no means a magic pill and can take a while to work but certainly it's worth a try. This approach is also no different to what many people have said (who have recovered or doing better) which is that worry makes insomnia so much worse and that you need to accept the current situation as a way of moving forward and improving it.

 

Guy has also written a nice book on the subject "The Sleep Book" which is an easy/fast read

 

Hope this helps

 

luv and hugs from down under

 

XOX

 

[[Ma...]]

Thanks for answering.No I had again a bad night.And I do not drink coffie or any stimulans Meowie.

1966 now I deffinetly have sleeping anxiety but in beggining I did not.My sleeping pattern just sundenly went bad and I have no clue way.But now yes I am scared.

[[...]]

Have you had any stress lately? additional anxiety, low mood set in? anxiety and low mood can disrupt sleep quite easily and are both associated with early morning waking and not being able to get back to sleep. if so maybe address this.. or maybe this is a temporary withdrawal wave that people talk about? whatever the exact cause, the fear/anxiety will be maintaining the insomnia/making it worse.. you might then consider practising acceptance, ie assuming it is temporary (for whatever reason), worry less about it, and focus on other things.. if you take the pressure off in this way it is more likely to resolve more quickly.. hope this helps

[[Fi...]]

Hey Masha...

 

Like others here, my insomnia was "frontloaded" and it was up there with the top five symptoms from the very beginning. Over the past year it has begun, slowly, to return. Now while I sleep longer, my depth of sleep is still not 'the best' and some nights are "twisty-turny"; but the trend is good.

 

There are things you can do to stack the odds in your favour.

 

The number one thing, I found, was to stop caring whether you "get sleep" or not. That's right. Paradoxical as it might sound, it is your fear of not getting sleep that will keep you awake and establish that pattern.

 

When approaching sleep in a fearful, doubtful state, your mind - essentially, your brain - interprets your fear in simple terms - fight or flight - not taking account of the source of your fear or any reasoning behind it; it could be any fear. Your brain then operates to keep you alert to anticipate a non-existent threat. In such circumstances, drifting off or being inattentive acts as a trigger to waken you up again - to jolt you awake - and keep you alert. Relaxation, unfortunately, similarly acts as a trigger and so a vicious cycle is set up. Any other point surrounding this central point is a secondary issue (sleep 'hygiene', dark room and all of that).

 

The way through is genuinely to surrender your concern about "getting sleep", or about "insomnia" or worrying about the thousand "what if" scenarios playing out in your mind about lack of sleep. Walk the other way. Let it go. Don't give a rat's arse. Be "whatever". Call a halt.

 

When I "got it" about this way of approaching it, there was a tipping point and within a week or ten days, matters began to resolve.

 

Other things that I did helped too, particularly: Same time every day for going to bed and getting up; a nightly "ritual" of pre-bed actions; a light pre-bed snack; a bland book and, most importantly, a "who cares" attitude. My view was that I wasn't getting any sleep anyway and the only difference between passing the same time, awake or not, was ME FRETTING ABOUT IT. When I stopped, it all stopped.

 

 

All the very best 

 

 

[[Ma...]]

1966 yes I had one very scary event in my life before onset of insomnia and I cannot stop thinking about it because it is not fixed jet.

Fizziewitch

I tried this what you said but for me it is not possible when I am in insomnia circle to just not think of something else.My life is in mess and if I think about someting else ii is making me even more scared and nervous. I am lieing in bad trying to think about something else and even if I make I still do not sleep because I am so nervous in my body. that I do not calm down.I tryed "I do not care too" but it did not work too, because I do care.

 

[[Fi...]]

1966 yes I had one very scary event in my life before onset od insomnia and I cannot stop thinking about because ot is not sorted jet.

 

This could indeed be holding you up.

Fizziewitch

I tried this what you said but for me it is not possible When I am in insomnia circle I just cannot think of anythong else.My life is in mess and of I think about someting else us making me even more scared and nervous. I am lieing in bad trying to think about something else and even if I make it is till do not sleep because i am so nervous in my body.I tryed I do nit care to but it did not work too.

 

I understand that Masha. I was the same. Exactly the same.

 

But it is good to take some charge of events or, at least, to move yourself into a position where that is more possible. Much better than allowing events to be in charge of you 

 

I made specific rules about bed and bed-time, one of which was that when in my bedroom preparing for sleep, I would agree willingly to suspend (or move towards suspending) all the usual looping, endless thinking, agree willingly to resume it the next day, if necessary, place my focus on letting go and, then, be "whatever" about actual sleep. There was no magic in it - just intent and a plan and a follow through. It didn't "work" immediately, but I had set up the conditions for it to work eventually - and then I switched off as best I could.

 

Your brain doesn't actually care whether or not you want to accompany it on an endless, relentless romp through all of your most fearsome thoughts.

 

I hope you find a good resolution soon along with success and peace and calm

 

 

 

:smitten:

 

[[...]]

excellent advice fizzlewitch XOX

[[Ma...]]

Very good advice but my problem is that I can decide what ever I want but cannot make it.The only way that this shit will stop is when something outside happeness and my thoughts goes on that.Nothing else.I feel totally hopless about this.Like my will do not mean nothing...Hard to explain.

[[Fi...]]

excellent advice fizzlewitch XOX

 

 

Thank you 1966 - only passing on that which I know has worked for me and many others 

 

 

[[Fi...]]

Very good advice but my problem is that I can decide what ever I want but cannot make it.The only way that this shit will stop is when something outside happeness and my thoughts goes on that.Nothing else.I feel totally hopless about this.Like my will do not mean nothing...Hard to explain.

 

I do understand that Masha and I know exactly how disarming it feels 

 

I also "get" how difficult it is to understand that others can have any 'real' insight into how you're feeling with all of this. I was there too! 

 

I'll just add that this isn't about "willpower". It's not about "forcing" anything or "striving" to make it happen. (that only makes everything worse!) It actually means the opposite - allowing, permitting and letting go. 

 

Why not move in that direction anyway - you've nothing to lose - and see how you get on.

 

All the very best  

[[Ma...]]

Fizziewitch

 

Thank you.I will try.Last night I slept 5 hours with broken sleep.Today I felt horrible.

[[te...]]

Fizzlewitch, you so well articulate this process, that has helped so many of us! Thank you for stating all this!!! You should write a book!

 

Masha, so sorry this is still so challenging and we all have been there and understand that wretched tiredness. 5 hours is pretty good though. I know, its not ideal and it doesn't feel good enough but your body still knows how to sleep. It's worth acknowledging and it WILL keep getting better. Sending you healing vibes and peace of mind.

[[me...]]

Masha, so sorry this is still so challenging and we all have been there and understand that wretched tiredness. 5 hours is pretty good though. I know, its not ideal and it doesn't feel good enough but your body still knows how to sleep. It's worth acknowledging and it WILL keep getting better. Sending you healing vibes and peace of mind.

 

I agree--5 hours may not feel great, but it is definitely enough to function on. It's a good start for where you are in the process. Try to accept what your body has given you, get outside and get some fresh air, this always seems to make me feel better! If you can keep your spirits up, things will only get better from here on out.

[[Fi...]]

Fizzlewitch, you so well articulate this process, that has helped so many of us! Thank you for stating all this!!! You should write a book!

 

Masha, so sorry this is still so challenging and we all have been there and understand that wretched tiredness. 5 hours is pretty good though. I know, its not ideal and it doesn't feel good enough but your body still knows how to sleep. It's worth acknowledging and it WILL keep getting better. Sending you healing vibes and peace of mind.

 

Thanks Teal... blushing now 

[[...]]

yeah i concur - 5 hours is reasonable even if it is broken.. acceptance and patience is the key.. give up your struggle with insomnia, treat it like it doesn't matter and it will begin to rectify.. this "attitude" doesn't come easily, it develops over time, but even if you only manage to half develop that mindset (like moi), it will help XOX

[[Qu...]]

Yes, I agree too! 5 hours is what I consider a 'Good' night, because I can function ok the next day. Broken doesn't matter, you get used to the wake ups.

[[Ma...]]

Thank you all for answering. :smitten:I am trying to work on this additude of no metter for insomnia.I hope I will make it.My hypnotic meditation started to work again but i need to listen that 4 times in the roud. After so much times of listening all over the same you are going crazy.

[[te...]]

Hi Masha, I don't have any great advice but just wanted to say that I hope it gets better for you and quickly. Are you able to take a nap maybe? Sometimes I am able to take a nap and it helps to take the edge off.

[[ve...]]

1966 yes I had one very scary event in my life before onset of insomnia and I cannot stop thinking about it because it is not fixed jet.

Fizziewitch

I tried this what you said but for me it is not possible when I am in insomnia circle to just not think of something else.My life is in mess and if I think about someting else ii is making me even more scared and nervous. I am lieing in bad trying to think about something else and even if I make I still do not sleep because I am so nervous in my body. that I do not calm down.I tryed "I do not care too" but it did not work too, because I do care.

 

My sleep is horrible...why do I call it sleep? It isn't. It is a state of agony in which I'm trembling and heart is racing and is doing so when I wake up. I AM though, trying not to care  and get up fix some toast and turn on TV. OK OK I watch the Lucy Show...minimal upset watching that. 

When it is acceptable (I recently moved to apartment complex). Looong story on why I had to move. More stressors. I get up and fix a smoothie, (blender roaring away) and it seems when my belly is full my nerves ease off. Some days quicker than others.

The lack of sleep IS agony, but ...get up, pee, brush your teeth, open the front door, water the plants (even at 2 a.m.) Take a warm shower. Kick a pillow around if that helps.

 

Other events in our lives can add to the stress. I can't take care of the whole world and the world is not taking care of me in this time of travail. My sister was diagnosed with breast cancer in July, I would awaken sobbing and afraid for her...spent much of my time at her place doing the nursing care and home care.  Now I meet her at the clinic and sit in the lobby while she is getting her treatment then we talk a bit and if I know she is ok. I go home. At times she calls me regarding finances and concerns and I do try and help, but as a counselor said "She is an adult, albeit your sister, she still needs to take care of herself." So I do what I can and don't berate myself for not magically curing her. I volunteered for strategy meetings due to the political climate and realized "Sorry I can't attend." "I support your cause but proceed without me for now."  I wander up to the community Center say Hi, read the paper, watch it rain and leave when I've had enough. There are days I just smile and wave and get my mail and wander off to my own place.  This is MY time. We women especially are taught to think we need to nurture everyone and are selfish if we don't. Well, I'm learning to be "selfish". If selfish gets me through this alive, then Hurray!!!

 

You can though, if you wish, read my other posts regarding supplementing and what I'm doing to alleviate the night time agony, but I'm working hard on not worrying about what time I wake up thingie.  I wish you well.

[[Fi...]]

Notwithstanding any tips, tricks or strategies for improving sleep (eventually), my observation is that it is inevitable that there will be 'sleepless' nights/days for an initial period - possibly a long period - when excess, excitatory glutamate is unopposed in our bodies. That is just a fact of the condition. We shouldn't be surprised by it. Insomnia is easily in the "top five" symptoms for almost everyone. It will pass, in time, whatever we do or don't do about it.

 

I'm pointing that out (don't shoot the messenger!) because a lot of us (me included) feel very hard done by and tend to rail against the 'unfairness' of it - causing ourselves additional stress and fretting and bother and, in the process, creating an unhelpful, defiant attitude within ourselves.

 

I believe hooking into such an attitude plays a big hand in keeping sleep at bay in the long term - exactly the opposite of what we desire.

 

Acceptance - and a "whatever" approach - is really the only valuable mindset here, not only as a 'technique' for getting back on the sleep-wagon, when that capabiltiy returns ultimately, but also to help ourselves in the most effective way during periods when sleep is 'just not going to happen'.

 

[[...]]

Once again fizzlewitch excellent advice. your should write a book on the topic XOX 

 

quote author=FizzleWitch link=topic=174069.msg2319757#msg2319757 date=1486471071]

Notwithstanding any tips, tricks or strategies for improving sleep (eventually), my observation is that it is inevitable that there will be 'sleepless' nights/days for an initial period - possibly a long period - when excess, excitatory glutamate is unopposed in our bodies. That is just a fact of the condition. We shouldn't be surprised by it. Insomnia is easily in the "top five" symptoms for almost everyone. It will pass, in time, whatever we do or don't do about it.

 

I'm pointing that out (don't shoot the messenger!) because a lot of us (me included) feel very hard done by and tend to rail against the 'unfairness' of it - causing ourselves additional stress and fretting and bother and, in the process, creating an unhelpful, defiant attitude within ourselves.

 

I believe hooking into such an attitude plays a big hand in keeping sleep at bay in the long term - exactly the opposite of what we desire.

 

Acceptance - and a "whatever" approach - is really the only valuable mindset here, not only as a 'technique' for getting back on the sleep-wagon, when that capabiltiy returns ultimately, but also to help ourselves in the most effective way during periods when sleep is 'just not going to happen'.