Anyone feel like this?? Did cold turkey cause brain damage?

[[Au...]]

Hello,

I have a few questions that I would love some advice on.

First of all I was forced to stop cold turkey by my doctors and though I was monitored for 5 days to make sure I didn't have a seizure it was so horrible that I worry its done irreparable damage to my brain. Has permanent damage been done because I wasn't allowed to taper?? Would going back on a low dose and tapering from that make these feelings go away?

I have such a hard time explaining things to people about how I feel. I feel no "investment" in things that used to matter to me or evoke an emotional response. I know that people automatically hear "loss of pleasure in things you normally enjoy" and automatically go straight for a diagnosis of depression, but I'm not depressed! This is DIFFERENT! I'm not sad, I'm not anything, it's like I can't feel! I get so frustrated with people telling me that maybe this is normal and I just don't remember because I was on Klonopin for so long. This is not normal!

I was on 2 MG of Klonopin for 3 years before going cold turkey 3 months ago. Can anyone relate? I'm so afraid I'll be like this forever...

[[er...]]

Hello,

I have a few questions that I would love some advice on.

First of all I was forced to stop cold turkey by my doctors and though I was monitored for 5 days to make sure I didn't have a seizure it was so horrible that I worry its done irreparable damage to my brain. Has permanent damage been done because I wasn't allowed to taper?? Would going back on a low dose and tapering from that make these feelings go away?

I have such a hard time explaining things to people about how I feel. I feel no "investment" in things that used to matter to me or evoke an emotional response. I know that people automatically hear "loss of pleasure in things you normally enjoy" and automatically go straight for a diagnosis of depression, but I'm not depressed! This is DIFFERENT! I'm not sad, I'm not anything, it's like I can't feel! I get so frustrated with people telling me that maybe this is normal and I just don't remember because I was on Klonopin for so long. This is not normal!

I was on 2 MG of Klonopin for 3 years before going cold turkey 3 months ago. Can anyone relate? I'm so afraid I'll be like this forever...

 

Hey,

 

I understand what you're talking about, that clonazepam is some awful shit.  I have had these issues and still do, to an extant. 

 

As much as it feels like it, I don't believe our brains will be damaged forever.  There are just too many people who have completely healed from our situations.  I didn't do a cold turkey, however my first "cut" was from 3.5mg of clonazepam to 1.0mg, so my brain really did get a heck of a shock, that threw me into the abyss that only sufferers of benzo w/d know about.

 

10.5 months out, I've just been starting to get some feelings about my previous possessions and things I should care about.  "Emotional blunting" has been an awful symptom to deal with.. I'm sure, with enough time, you will start to "feel" again, although it may happen slowly

 

At 3 months out, I can't see how re-instating will do you any good whatsoever!  Don't even "go there" with your thoughts.. The damage from your c/t has been done, and if you take benzos again, it won't just magically reverse.  Just try to look forward as best as you can.

 

If I were you, I wouldn't bother talking about all of this too much to anyone.  They simply will not and can not "get it".  Regrettably, I bent a lot of people's ear to this, and at the end of the day, it really doesn't do much good.  If you were healthy, and someone came up to you and was talking about all the shit we go through, you'd probably think the person had some serious issues..

 

This is why a lot of us enjoy benzo buddies so much, (I think?), because we are people who truly understand what the heck we're all talking about.  Stay close to the site and it should help you out a lot!

 

Eric

 

 

[[Au...]]

Just wanted to say thank you so much for your response, it meant so much. I think you're right, trying to get another prescription in hopes that I'll suddenly have my feelings reinstated is probably silly, just start to feel desperate sometimes which I know you get. I am so relieved to finally speak with someone who doesn't tell me what I'm feeling is invalid.

[Guest [ba...]]

You will be fine.  I spent a few months (months 4-6) feeling numb to just about everything.  No joy, no feelings, no caring about much of anything (I was still quite capable of anger, however).  I called this period my zombie phase.  It wasn't fun, but it beat the hell out of months 1-3.  It slowly got better, and by the end of month #6, I was almost back to normal.  I took klonopin (1 mg) for around 5 years, then Ativan (2 mgs) for about a year before I c/t'd.

 

I would not recommend reinstating this far out.

[[pa...]]

I did a similar c/t off of Xanax.  I admitted myself into a detox facility and they stopped my Xanax c/t and put me on Valium, then tapered me off of that in 5 days.  I read in the Ashton manual that in my case my taper schedule should have been 48 weeks.  I am paying the price now for that rapid taper.  I am 9 months jumped and still experiencing extreme anxiety from withdrawal.  What I have been reading tells me that I probably won't see significant relief until 12 months out.

[[Ge...]]

I've had emotional flatness for several months now... I hate it.  I feel so disengaged.

[[Sh...]]

Hello,

I have a few questions that I would love some advice on.

First of all I was forced to stop cold turkey by my doctors and though I was monitored for 5 days to make sure I didn't have a seizure it was so horrible that I worry its done irreparable damage to my brain. Has permanent damage been done because I wasn't allowed to taper?? Would going back on a low dose and tapering from that make these feelings go away?

I have such a hard time explaining things to people about how I feel. I feel no "investment" in things that used to matter to me or evoke an emotional response. I know that people automatically hear "loss of pleasure in things you normally enjoy" and automatically go straight for a diagnosis of depression, but I'm not depressed! This is DIFFERENT! I'm not sad, I'm not anything, it's like I can't feel! I get so frustrated with people telling me that maybe this is normal and I just don't remember because I was on Klonopin for so long. This is not normal!

I was on 2 MG of Klonopin for 3 years before going cold turkey 3 months ago. Can anyone relate? I'm so afraid I'll be like this forever...

 

Hey,

 

I understand what you're talking about, that clonazepam is some awful shit.  I have had these issues and still do, to an extant. 

 

As much as it feels like it, I don't believe our brains will be damaged forever.  There are just too many people who have completely healed from our situations.  I didn't do a cold turkey, however my first "cut" was from 3.5mg of clonazepam to 1.0mg, so my brain really did get a heck of a shock, that threw me into the abyss that only sufferers of benzo w/d know about.

 

10.5 months out, I've just been starting to get some feelings about my previous possessions and things I should care about.  "Emotional blunting" has been an awful symptom to deal with.. I'm sure, with enough time, you will start to "feel" again, although it may happen slowly

 

At 3 months out, I can't see how re-instating will do you any good whatsoever!  Don't even "go there" with your thoughts.. The damage from your c/t has been done, and if you take benzos again, it won't just magically reverse.  Just try to look forward as best as you can.

 

If I were you, I wouldn't bother talking about all of this too much to anyone.  They simply will not and can not "get it".  Regrettably, I bent a lot of people's ear to this, and at the end of the day, it really doesn't do much good.  If you were healthy, and someone came up to you and was talking about all the shit we go through, you'd probably think the person had some serious issues..

 

This is why a lot of us enjoy benzo buddies so much, (I think?), because we are people who truly understand what the heck we're all talking about.  Stay close to the site and it should help you out a lot!

 

Eric

 

I tend to disagree. If you've been CT without knowledge of what was happening and your brain feels fried, reinstating can sometimes be a much better option. It just means that you'll probly get nice and stable and feel good, but then have to go through a long, brutal taper. The taper shouldnt be as bad as the CT but it will still be bloody tough. I accidently CT valium before I knew I was hooked. I started getting panic attacks that were terrifying. Once I went back on they disappeared for good but the taper still brought me a lot of mental pain.

[[ma...]]

Now i find you, i think. Am new here. Yes 45 weeks you should taper. Of Cours you feel sick . I have a strange feeling is like...i cant se My self before on Xanax...