Need help could be dealing with Remeron tolerance

[[ja...]]

I am going to post what I put on my blog first because I don't have the strength to retype it all.

 

Where to begin. First off I was 2 years 9 months off of tapering Valium from a C/O of Xanax. I was doing really good until August 10TH when I became very Ill and could not eat any solid foods. I suspected it was Transverse Myelitis a disease I got in 1997. I had a virus and instead of my Immune system attacking the virus it attacked my spinal cord at C2 level of my neck. I was lucky not to have been paralyzed from my neck down. Instead I suffered with nerve and muscle damage mostly in my arms and the trunk of my body. The only drug that helped with the nerve pain and burning was Xanax. I remained on Xanax until it stopped working.

 

So here I am now with another attack from the Transverse Myelitis. This time it attacked my stomach and esophagus so trying to eat anything solid and certain textures feel like they are not going down or digesting. I've had every Gastro test and all normal. My MRI showed no new lesions so my Neurologist is helping me by trying different drugs. Nothing is helping. The only drug that gives me any relief at all is Lorazapam. I've reluctantly been taking up to 1mg off and on since September. I have probably been taking about 70 pills. I haven't taken any for a couple of days now and my nerve pain is terrible.

 

Even though my family knows what I have been through with w/d they just don't understand why I don't want to take them. At the same time I not only need relief I need to eat and taking them helps me eat a little more, just soft foods though. I am becoming depressed but don't do well with anti depressants however I  am on about 3.5 mg Remeron to help with sleep. I tried Gabapentin but felt terrible and had a hard time drinking the liquid medicine since I can't swallow the pills. I stopped the Gabapentin after a month and I don't feel it was a problem.

 

I am so sick and at a loss. What does anyone know about taking the benzo a 2ND time around. I'm so scared but don't know what to do. Any thoughts are appreciated. Trying to stay positive even in this condition. Thank you and I love you all so much. Also so very proud of Ellen and Terry. I know what you went through.

 

As of today I am 4 days off the Lorazapam and on the Remeron now for about 4 months I need to look at what I wrote down when I started. I am having w/d but not sure what is doing it. I do feel real foggy in the day and anxiety getting more Intense. I can't believe I am in this mess again along with already being so ill. Any help please because I'm not sure how to procede. I don't want to reinstate the Lorazapam for several reasons. 1 I am hoping that since it was a short amount of time and about 80, .05mg pills that maybe I will only be in w/d for a couple months, 2 my doctor has already brought me through a over 2 year taper he will not believe that Lorazapam is doing it since I have been so sick. I don't want to go through it all again anyway  and not sure it is wise.

 

Also I am not sure if it isn't the Remeron. Oh man I hate this. Why  oh why did I take these again.

 

Thank you

Love Jackie :smitten:

[Guest [Ma...]]

Dearest Jackie,

I cannot offer you advice but wanted to say that I am so sorry to hear of your situation. You are incredibly strong and am certain will heal through this.

 

Much love,

Marija

 

[[...]]

HI there - imo i would not restart the benzo's or if you do reinstate taper off and then withdraw. i think benzo's are only good short term - after that they cause more trouble than what they are worth.. hope this helps and i feel your distress XOX

 

PS. yes i think with ad's you can become tolerant and then start to withdraw. my understanding tho is that ad's are not as hard to come off compared to benzo's but still tapering down is required before withdrawal..

 

I am going to post what I put on my blog first because I don't have the strength to retype it all.

 

Where to begin. First off I was 2 years 9 months off of tapering Valium from a C/O of Xanax. I was doing really good until August 10TH when I became very Ill and could not eat any solid foods. I suspected it was Transverse Myelitis a disease I got in 1997. I had a virus and instead of my Immune system attacking the virus it attacked my spinal cord at C2 level of my neck. I was lucky not to have been paralyzed from my neck down. Instead I suffered with nerve and muscle damage mostly in my arms and the trunk of my body. The only drug that helped with the nerve pain and burning was Xanax. I remained on Xanax until it stopped working.

 

So here I am now with another attack from the Transverse Myelitis. This time it attacked my stomach and esophagus so trying to eat anything solid and certain textures feel like they are not going down or digesting. I've had every Gastro test and all normal. My MRI showed no new lesions so my Neurologist is helping me by trying different drugs. Nothing is helping. The only drug that gives me any relief at all is Lorazapam. I've reluctantly been taking up to 1mg off and on since September. I have probably been taking about 70 pills. I haven't taken any for a couple of days now and my nerve pain is terrible.

 

Even though my family knows what I have been through with w/d they just don't understand why I don't want to take them. At the same time I not only need relief I need to eat and taking them helps me eat a little more, just soft foods though. I am becoming depressed but don't do well with anti depressants however I  am on about 3.5 mg Remeron to help with sleep. I tried Gabapentin but felt terrible and had a hard time drinking the liquid medicine since I can't swallow the pills. I stopped the Gabapentin after a month and I don't feel it was a problem.

 

I am so sick and at a loss. What does anyone know about taking the benzo a 2ND time around. I'm so scared but don't know what to do. Any thoughts are appreciated. Trying to stay positive even in this condition. Thank you and I love you all so much. Also so very proud of Ellen and Terry. I know what you went through.

 

As of today I am 4 days off the Lorazapam and on the Remeron now for about 4 months I need to look at what I wrote down when I started. I am having w/d but not sure what is doing it. I do feel real foggy in the day and anxiety getting more Intense. I can't believe I am in this mess again along with already being so ill. Any help please because I'm not sure how to procede. I don't want to reinstate the Lorazapam for several reasons. 1 I am hoping that since it was a short amount of time and about 80, .05mg pills that maybe I will only be in w/d for a couple months, 2 my doctor has already brought me through a over 2 year taper he will not believe that Lorazapam is doing it since I have been so sick. I don't want to go through it all again anyway  and not sure it is wise.

 

Also I am not sure if it isn't the Remeron. Oh man I hate this. Why  oh why did I take these again.

 

Thank you

Love Jackie :smitten:

[[be...]]

Lesson learned Jackie. I'd stay very clear of benzos and you're on a very low low dose of Remeron. Other than maybe helping you sleep it's honestly of no therapeutic benefit. I'm sorry you're so sick but hang in there. Better days ahead. If you suspect the Remeron of upsetting you, you could simply stop it I imagine. I'd talk to my doctor first though. For most on Remeron, but not all, you could probably go off the Remeron with little trouble. If you feel the need to taper off it you'd likely need it in liquid form. Hang in there. It's tough but try your hardest to know that you'll be better in time. B

[[Ch...]]

Hi Jackie,

Four days off leads me to think you may be in the worst of the Lorazepam withdrawal.  How's it going today?  If it's not worse, then I'd hang on. 

Chal 

[[pi...]]

Jackie,

 

I'm so sorry to hear about your illness. You needed to do what was necessary to ease the pain and allow yourself to eat and get nourishment.

 

I would have to agree with Challis, even though you took lorazepam relatively short term, it is still possible to feel withdrawal effects.  I did immensely when I stopped Ativan cold turkey for a medical test after taking the drug for 6-7 weeks. 

 

I hope the doctors can offer medication that is not a benzo for your condition.

 

pianogirl 

[[ja...]]

Thank you everyone. Last night I woke at 3 AM and had the bad anxiety and didn't sleep from then on. When I got up I felt very off balance and thought oh no I'm in this now. Had anxiety and nausea off and on until around 3PM and I feel fine right now. Head fog lifted and anxiety is maybe at a very low twinge now. So maybe it is behind me or maybe it won't get any worse now. What do you think Challis?

 

Love Jackie :smitten:

[[Ch...]]

I think it's a very good sign that you're feeling fine at the moment… personally, I never felt 'fine' for five minutes during withdrawal.

Doesn't mean it's over, but I would be surprised, really surprised, if it got worse from here on out.

 

No guarantees, so don't hold me to that opinion..  but you know me, Jackie, I'm always going to go straight to the bright side of things.  Can't hurt, might help.

 

[[ja...]]

Thanks Challis, no never felt clear in my head and I never felt any hours  of feeling almost normal when I tapered. I was in pretty heavy head fog and then anxiety for 2 days. I am holding onto I'll be alright. Thanks bunches!!!!!

 

:smitten: :smitten:

 

 

[[Ch...]]

 

You know, I always thought that I'd been on a benzodiazepine for 30 years straight, so kindling couldn't be a factor in my withdrawal issues.  But as my memory cleared, I remembered that I went on and off Temazepam a couple of times…once for a long period when I was pregnant with my daughter and nursing her for the next 22 months.  And when the doctor put me on Xanax when my mother's thing happened, I cold turkeyed the Temazepam because the Xanax covered the RLS related insomnia I was taking it for.

 

And I healed just fine.  You will, too…focus on ways you can deal more naturally with the other health issue.

[[ja...]]

Yep, I guess I feel like I would be crawling out of my skin and its more on and off anxiety feelings and some nausea but that could be because I'm sick.. Never again will I take a benzo unless it's for surgery. Not worth the w/d and worry. My family really pushed for me to take them since I haven't been eating to much. But now I'm still sick and dealing with this too now. I pray it doesn't get worse

 

Thanks  :smitten:

[[Ch...]]

One difference between long acting benzos and a short acting benzos is that the symptoms of withdrawal hit much harder and faster, so my bet's on the worst being either now or already behind you.  You tapered Valium the last time, didn't you? 

 

[[ja...]]

Yes I c/o from Xanax. I wouldn't have done that but I was a mess  and couldn't taper the Xanax. That taper took a very long time out of my life.

[[ja...]]

I really don't think this will get worse.