12 years of valium useage has come to an end

[[Da...]]

Hello all,

 

I'm a male and am 33 years old.

 

When I was 21 years old I developed an extreme form of agoraphobia.

This started at the age of 20 and started from a minor inconvenience to the point that I was even scared to leave my home.

 

At that time I had to quit my study, lost my girlfriend and fell into a big depression.

 

I contacted my local doctor and he send me to a psych.   

 

That's when I first came in contact with Valium.

It was prescribed as a temporary solution for my anxiety.

I got a antidepressant that helped me a lot and still does.

However I used the Valium already for a couple of months and became just a part of my daily life.

 

More or less I kind off abused it at the beginning.

Especially at important social moments like a job interview or a first date with a girl.

From important moments it slipped trough less important moments and finally a daily usage habit with physical dependency as result. 

 

In the following years, I just keep using it without any kind of thought about stopping it or taking less, since I felt good and the moment was never right.

 

The last years I became aware that I felt more nervous than the years I started Valium.

The dose I used stayed pretty much the same except for socially difficult situation.

Instead of taking 4 pills of 5mg at the same time for a job interview or meeting, I toke 6 or 7 pills.

 

I realized that the effect of Valium were less strong than normal and needed more pills to get the same effect.

 

At February this year I made the decision to quit Valium and after preparing myself I started on the first of March.

 

The road to the point i'm now has been hard.

With ups and downs I managed to quit totally at 31 October.

 

I hoped that once the physical dependence was gone, I would feel my normal self again.

Boy what was I wrong...

 

Since I got rid of the Valium, I feel all kind of physical and mentally abnormalities.

 

Thoughts that are so much stronger now and influence my emotions big time.

Sad, anxious, mad and happy as well .

 

I have been checking this community a lot and helped me a great time.

 

This is my only real information source to date and would like to be part of this great community to assist others in their difficult road

to salvation and get any advise on my own situation  from the great people here.

 

 

 

 

[[be...]]

Hi  Welcome to BenzoBuddies!

 

Congrats on being benzodiazepine free. Your journey is like so many here. I think this will be an excellent place for you to connect with members who have shared similar experiences.

 

You might like to check out The Ashton Manual it is an authoritative source on what to expect in withdrawal and recovery.  Dr. Ashton is an expert in the field. 

 

Please feel free to post to any of the dedicated boards, we have a wonderful community of people here, who will give sound advice. Members have been through all aspects of benzodiazepine use and withdrawal and are more than willing to share their experiences.

 

Members discuss their symptoms on the Post withdrawal recovery support.

 

Please take the time to Create a Signature.  This will allow others to see where you are in the process so they can better support you.

 

Again Welcome! 

 

benzos-R-cruel