I can't take it, please help.

[[Jo...]]

I'm so scared, the anxiety, the pain, insomnia, I keep talking about a symptom but I don't know if none has said they have it. I have his nerve pain, like hot oil is being poured inside me. But the part I haven't heard anyone say they have, is how it moves. It's like a searing hot knife stuck in front of my spine right now. But it moves. It'll move up ton the middle of my back and just sit between my shoulder blades, it makes those muscles bubble and constrict. But it also goes into my intestines and causes massive anxiety and wanting of cry. Then it moves over kidneys, and it even moves into my head, in my sinuses and behind my eyes, it makes my left eye feel like it's gonna pop out and I lose touch with reality. It's like a poisoning burning knife dragging around my body causing symptoms wherever it sits, and it doesn't stop.

 

This is day 7 since my last dose of 10mg valium. I was clean for 1.5 years, felt pretty good other then some fog and sinus pressure. I realize my first taper took way too long. But I stupidly took 2.5mg valium 3 weeks ago for a panic attack, then I kept getting them so I took more, then 5mg, then finally 10mg. I took a total of maybe 8 or 10 pills over the course of 2 weeks. Then I stopped. Scared to start again and do a taper cause Itll prolong the suffering I've heard.

 

In.just scared, is this really benzos, maybe I have Lyme disease, or a parasite moving around my body. Right now that knife is stuck in my middle back, right in front of my spine, just stuck there, burning. The burning radiates to my legs and arms. It feels like my body is about to seize up. I want to scream and cry.

 

I never had this much pain during my interdose withdrawals or during my entire taper. Did I really hurt myself that much with 10 pills?

 

I can't live like this, I'm scared I'm gonna lose everything, I'm scared for my kids and my wife, I don't want them to see me like this, I don't want her to have to deal with me. I feel like a burden now.

 

Now the pain moving to middle of back, my intestines feel so nauseous. I'm trying to smoke weed, but it's mainly cbd, I heard I need more thc for it to help. I wanna throw up and cry, I want to escape, somehow, I'm terrified to take that pill again if I'll just have to start this all over.

[[Ch...]]

Distressing as this symptom can be, your description is one I've read here a number of times.  The nervous system is super sensitive right now, so everything feels much more intense than it normally would.  One top of that, benzodiazepines are strong muscle relaxants, so many times the muscles in various parts of the body go into spasm and this does tend to move around.

 

I'm sorry you're going through this.  At 7 days off, you're considered to be in the acute period (around 30 days) post withdrawal...look for things to begin settling down with some more time.

 

 

[[Jo...]]

This sucks, 3 more weeks approx of this shit. 😓😢😭 this should be illegal, it's literally human torture .

[[Pr...]]

I took klonopin 1.5mgs for a year.. the first week was horrible i know exactly what u mean about feeling like hot oil in ur veins.. everything hurt down to my bones.. it was horrible.. but now im 3 weeks in tomorrow n all physical symptoms are gone except the dizziness is still lurking around, light sensitive, depersonalization Alittle bit.. it will get better day by day.. it will pass.. hope u get well soon..sorry ur going thru this tough time..

[[KR...]]

Try not to over stimulate yourself with anything that causes you anxiety. Be gentle with yourself until your symptoms start to ease. Time will pass and you WILL get better. Promise!

[[Jo...]]

I took klonopin 1.5mgs for a year.. the first week was horrible i know exactly what u mean about feeling like hot oil in ur veins.. everything hurt down to my bones.. it was horrible.. but now im 3 weeks in tomorrow n all physical symptoms are gone except the dizziness is still lurking around, light sensitive, depersonalization Alittle bit.. it will get better day by day.. it will pass.. hope u get well soon..sorry ur going thru this tough time..

 

I hope the physical is gone at 3 weeks. I don't have much DP. just some fog and sinus pressure, anxiety etc..

 

Actually it would be great if the insomnia left. That one sucks.

 

Thanks for the support, I don't remember symptoms like this the first time I withdrew so it's been freaking me out bad.