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Explaining benzo withdrawal ?


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I just wondered something. Since it's impossible to explain to someone how it feels to be in benzo w/d because people don't understand why it takes months, or years for some, I thought about something that made sense to me.

We all lost something in the process. We lost ourselves somehow. That's a form of grief and that's how I feel.

Can you really expect someone to recover from grief in a heartbeat? In a week? In a month? No you can't.

Look at the 7 stages of grief and you'll probably see your progress in there, in some twisted way.

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You are so right.  :thumbsup:

 

Grief over the loss of my mother is how this whole nightmare started with me......instead of allowing me to grieve in my own good time, I was surrounded by people who were telling me "just get over it and get something from your dr."....I was still working at the time, and my vile, nasty supervisor gave me a memo that said I wasn't allowed to cry b/c my mother passed away and if I did, disciplinary action would be taken......so I was forced to take drastic measures and went to my dr.....who prescribed Lorazepam.  Now, at 27 months benzo-free, along with being severely, physically sick 24/7, I'm grieving again....this time the loss of me.....the person I was....my life.....my health.....my job (had to retire b/c of being so sick).....my independence....my ability to earn a living.....my friends.....my relatives.....my relationships.....and on and on. 

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It is impossible to explain to anyone exactly how we feel, it is even hard to explain it to myself. I am this total stranger to myself still after 8 months and I also no longer have the connections to other people, I think that is the DR/DP I think causes that. All we can do is get on with it as hard as that is too. It is really a difficult question to answer.
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I recently came across this free book download and I was surprised it was free because it's pretty awesome. It's someone who went through benzo hell who not only talks about the experience but is able to articulate the thought processes we go through in this state. Very interesting and I could have never have put the experience in words like this person did. The rest of the book has a lot of background info about why this is all happening, background history of benzos and how we got here as a society. Easy quick read, even if you don't use it to educate someone else it's a good one for those us living in benzoland to better understand our experience. It's called "The Benzo Book" (such an original title, I know) and you can download it at:

 

http://www.thebenzobook.com/benzo/pdfs/the-benzo-book10.pdf

 

Has anyone else read this?

 

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