Doctor jokes

[[li...]]

From a real doc, a psychiatrist: '

 

Nice thing about clonazepam is with its long 1/2 life, detox is pretty easy.

 

In a community setting, I'd probably cut the dose by 1 mg each step targeting your comfort and desired end date more than anything else. Say you're on 2 mg three times daily, we could decrease 1 mg daily and have you off the med in 7-10 days.'

 

[[Bu...]]

After telling my doc (no longer) that I had constant, debilitating GI pain, hard to eat and losing an alarming amount of weight, he said:  "Go eat a double cheeseburger..." 

[[...]]

unfortunately, it's not a joke.  I wish it were!

[[Ma...]]

I heard a lot of shit from doctors but the worse which was repeated by different doctors were:

 

I was told to get pregnant!

 

Because "for a woman a pregnancy is always healing".

I said "the poor baby! It would get addicted too, have a mother who is depressed and sick and jobless!"

Then the doctor said "the baby won't suffer from the pills that you take. And you will get force by getting a baby"

 

aaaaahmmmm. ??????

 

And in the end the put pressure on me "if not now it can be too late".

 

Thanks a lot. That really helped me to carry on. NOT.

 

They can take benzos. They don't have a brain to get injured..

 

 

[[be...]]

"The 10 mg of klonopin is no longer working for you. Here, take some more."

[[Lo...]]

When I went to Urgent Care to get a note for work, the doc said. Why take those pills? Sometimes it is just better to have some Jack Daniels to relax....

[[Ch...]]

'Nice work getting down to .25mg from 2mg of Xanax.  Why don't you stay on it for maintenance since you seem to be an anxious type.'

 

Or at the ER with sky high BP right after my taper ended:

 

'I give my patients Klonopin for that.  It makes the withdrawal easier.'

 

[[Lo...]]

Hey doc, I am think I am dependent on ativan. Oh no, you're not dependent, you're a smart guy. You're asking all the right questions.

[[co...]]

"It can't possibly be withdrawal this far out." "But doc there's a website with tens of thousands suffering the same thing as me from the same drugs."  "Don't believe what you read on the internet, in this case it's not your friend."

[[pi...]]

Way too late in the process I started to read about this class of medications. This is what I heard from doctors:

 

1. You've been off Ativan for two weeks, so you can't possibly be in withdrawal.

 

2. You don't have an addictive personality so dependence in not an issue.

 

3. It sounds like you are feeling withdrawal, would you take an additional dose mid-day?

 

4. Here, have some Ativan if you feel anxious and panicky. Oh and here's some valium for headaches.  (3 benzos  ).

 

5. When I was trying to reduce clonazepam on my own but having terrible side effects and asked for advice from pdoc:  There is really nothing else to do outside of a 30 day detox.

 

 

 

[[Gr...]]

Me:  Doc - I just feel like this klonopin isn't working for me anymore. 

 

Dr.:  You need to to take more.

 

Me:  But I get so tired.

 

Dr.  Have some more coffee or have a cigarette.  That'll help.

[[be...]]

'Nice work getting down to .25mg from 2mg of Xanax.  Why don't you stay on it for maintenance since you seem to be an anxious type.'

 

Or at the ER with sky high BP right after my taper ended:

 

'I give my patients Klonopin for that.  It makes the withdrawal easier.'

 

 

Tee hee 

[[li...]]

I was feeling miserable, but some of those were making me laugh !

 

Sad and funny at the same time.

[[Ma...]]

It is really BREATHTAKING how these people with white overalls do work!!

 

I am really angry reading this all..

[[ca...]]

Having screaming Tenititus asked my ENT Doc if it could be from the taper ? His reply was no can`t be we give Klonpin to help it ! NP, told Her i was coming off Benzo`s Her reply was ~When She worked in the prison system they took people off in 12 days  and they were fine ! 

[[be...]]

Having screaming Tenititus asked my ENT Doc if it could be from the taper ? His reply was no can`t be we give Klonpin to help it ! NP, told Her i was coming off Benzo`s Her reply was ~When She worked in the prison system they took people off in 12 days  and they were fine !

 

HA! Seen to much of that garbage, CD..............

[[be...]]

I heard a lot of shit from doctors but the worse which was repeated by different doctors were:

 

I was told to get pregnant!

 

Because "for a woman a pregnancy is always healing".

I said "the poor baby! It would get addicted too, have a mother who is depressed and sick and jobless!"

Then the doctor said "the baby won't suffer from the pills that you take. And you will get force by getting a baby"

 

aaaaahmmmm. ??????

 

And in the end the put pressure on me "if not now it can be too late".

 

Thanks a lot. That really helped me to carry on. NOT.

 

They can take benzos. They don't have a brain to get injured..

 

Mari:

 

I just can't believe they said that, and I thought I saw everything here by now. UGH! They don't have a brain to get injured.. true, true.......

[[Vm...]]

LOL!!!! That sounds about right!!!!

[[ca...]]

Having screaming Tenititus asked my ENT Doc if it could be from the taper ? His reply was no can`t be we give Klonpin to help it ! NP, told Her i was coming off Benzo`s Her reply was ~When She worked in the prison system they took people off in 12 days  and they were fine !

 

HA! Seen to much of that garbage, CD..............

Bets, this v is a bit rougher then I thought hope your doing ok ?

 

[[Ma...]]

I heard a lot of shit from doctors but the worse which was repeated by different doctors were:

 

I was told to get pregnant!

 

Because "for a woman a pregnancy is always healing".

I said "the poor baby! It would get addicted too, have a mother who is depressed and sick and jobless!"

Then the doctor said "the baby won't suffer from the pills that you take. And you will get force by getting a baby"

 

aaaaahmmmm. ??????

 

And in the end the put pressure on me "if not now it can be too late".

 

Thanks a lot. That really helped me to carry on. NOT.

 

They can take benzos. They don't have a brain to get injured..

 

Mari:

 

I just can't believe they said that, and I thought I saw everything here by now. UGH! They don't have a brain to get injured.. true, true.......

 

 

 

YES! I think that I am such a very goodlooking person that everyone has to tell me to give me genes to the world..?!!

I was told to act like that not only by my Psycho-Doc, also my normal doc, my Gynacologist and my orthopedic told me!!! Oh - you have psycho problems - well, get pregnant (ah - right here?).. What the hell?!!! Perhaps they have all read the same stupid article written by on of these not-knowers in one of these magazines "what the updtodate doc must say NOW" or sth like that...

 

It made me sad, too. Because I am wondering about babies.. a lot.. but I know that it can be too late because of the benzos and the sickness... I do not need stupid people remind me all the time...

[[wh...]]

1) DR in ER said to me that my body has become physically dependent on the Ativan and said good luck with that and walked out of the room.

2) Psychiatrist admitted it was W/D said it won't kill me and tried to up the dose.  I said no I want off

 

[[Ma...]]

1) DR in ER said to me that my body has become physically dependent on the Ativan and said good luck with that and walked out of the room.

2) Psychiatrist admitted it was W/D said it won't kill me and tried to up the dose.  I said no I want off

 

 

I do not know which one I hate more... They should be given the stuff, loose their work, family, friends and then meet you again.

 

I am not a good person any more when I read such things

 

Lots of you write that they do not wish withdrawal to their worse enemy - I wish it to any doctor who has prescribed it and acted that way you can read in these postings..

[[be...]]

I heard a lot of shit from doctors but the worse which was repeated by different doctors were:

 

I was told to get pregnant!

 

Because "for a woman a pregnancy is always healing".

I said "the poor baby! It would get addicted too, have a mother who is depressed and sick and jobless!"

Then the doctor said "the baby won't suffer from the pills that you take. And you will get force by getting a baby"

 

aaaaahmmmm. ??????

 

And in the end the put pressure on me "if not now it can be too late".

 

Thanks a lot. That really helped me to carry on. NOT.

 

They can take benzos. They don't have a brain to get injured..

 

Mari:

 

I just can't believe they said that, and I thought I saw everything here by now. UGH! They don't have a brain to get injured.. true, true.......

 

 

 

YES! I think that I am such a very goodlooking person that everyone has to tell me to give me genes to the world..?!!

I was told to act like that not only by my Psycho-Doc, also my normal doc, my Gynacologist and my orthopedic told me!!! Oh - you have psycho problems - well, get pregnant (ah - right here?).. What the hell?!!! Perhaps they have all read the same stupid article written by on of these not-knowers in one of these magazines "what the updtodate doc must say NOW" or sth like that...

 

It made me sad, too. Because I am wondering about babies.. a lot.. but I know that it can be too late because of the benzos and the sickness... I do not need stupid people remind me all the time...

 

I'm so glad you are not believing this. I told my mom and she was very shocked. So am I........ugh. I'm sure you'll be able to have kids, unless you are my age.

[[be...]]

Having screaming Tenititus asked my ENT Doc if it could be from the taper ? His reply was no can`t be we give Klonpin to help it ! NP, told Her i was coming off Benzo`s Her reply was ~When She worked in the prison system they took people off in 12 days  and they were fine !

 

HA! Seen to much of that garbage, CD..............

Bets, this v is a bit rougher then I thought hope your doing ok ?

 

Same here CD. I was hoping to taper like I did my K, but I can't sleep at all at night if I do. But so far, I remain symptom less. That's probably because I am moving like a turtle......I'm keeping up with your sig all of the time. Darn, I should have done a direct taper.

[[Ni...]]

Nurse practitioner says to me clonezapam is great for sleep.. Stanford University Medical did a study and found you can get into REM sleep.

I'm sure she heard this from big pharma rep!

 

Doctor at detox: We can't keep you on benzos when someone is an alcholic we don't continue to give them more alcohol!

 

No more doctors for me!