Someone throw me a lifeline of hope

[[sh...]]

I had my first major window of a somewhat normal life in seven months.  I wasn't consumed with fear and dread, i didn't feel like i was walking through life in a spinning vortex tunnel, my stomach no longer felt like a bottomless pit that could never be filled, the muscle pain and tremors were gone, i had energy, i laughed for the first in months. I had blissful hope.  It all came back..as if i was at ground zero. I feel like i am dying,going to black out, cant get alert. Is this really withdrawl  or am i dying of some bizzare undiagnosed disease? I had a battery of tests over the last year that are all normal.  Why do i feel so close to death? Has anyone gone through this and made it out?

[[me...]]

I had my first major window of a somewhat normal life in seven months.  I wasn't consumed with fear and dread, i didn't feel like i was walking through life in a spinning vortex tunnel, my stomach no longer felt like a bottomless pit that could never be filled, the muscle pain and tremors were gone, i had energy, i laughed for the first in months. I had blissful hope.  It all came back..as if i was at ground zero. I feel like i am dying,going to black out, cant get alert. Is this really withdrawl  or am i dying of some bizzare undiagnosed disease? I had a battery of tests over the last year that are all normal.  Why do i feel so close to death? Has anyone gone through this and made it out?

 

Yes, I've gone through it and made it out, as have many, many others.  Benzo withdrawal is anything but linear, and it's certainly not logical.  It's a rollercoaster, which gradually over time levels out.  TIME itself is the healer, and the fact that you had a major window is proof that you are healing. 

 

 

[[sh...]]

Thank you for posting, it really helps me.

[[Sh...]]

http://s3.amazonaws.com/media.eremedia.com/uploads/2015/04/15173539/Fotolia_75663171_XS.jpg

 

Shattered1 I am throwing you this lifeline of hope and help and healing.  You will get there!  You are experiencing the hell of benzo withdrawal and its hard to have perspective whilst in in the throes of such awful feelings.  Your wonderful window will return and they will become more frequent as your healing progresses.  I am almost 10 months out from my last dose of Xanax and just in recent weeks have I begun to feel as though I will be okay. You will be too!  Grab on to this lifeline of hope and hang on for dear life.  You are in the battle of your life and you WILL be victorious.

 

XX

She

[[sh...]]

I am grabbing on, thank you for the encouragement. Words cannot express my gratitude. May your journey through this hell come to an end.

[[Se...]]

Sending hope, peace, calmness. 

I know withdrawals seem like they can last even after days of windows. Patience with myself & faith in a brighter future is keeping me going.

Be grateful for the healing your brain & body has done so far. 

[[co...]]

Hi shattered one. I was doing pretty good at 7 months thru 12  but then I got hit with a wave that made me bedridden. Like I was in acute again. I thought I was dying. But I wasn't and neither are you. It lasted almost 3 months but now at almost 19 months I feel better than ever. I know the up and down nature is very depressing but you will get better! Hang in there! 

[[lg...]]

Hi confused1, what you are saying is my life story. I thought forever I was going to not survive withdrawal and there must be something terrible wrong with me. I am still alive and kicking and things do get better with time. I have windows where I believe I am totally done with withdrawal and bam, the symptoms are back and I get really depressed.

 

We are the only people who can possibly know what it feels like, you can not relay it to anyone else.

Stick in there I think you will find ppl here are helpful and you will get better. Just take it slowly!

 

I went off 3mg a day of Xanax I took from 2000-2015

Detoxed in rehab over a 10 day period in November 2015 Cold Turkey

Also detoxed at the same time from Oxycontin 80mg per day.

[[lg...]]

I'm sorry I called u confused1, that prob should be my handle.