Post Benzo Freedom Withdrawal Support Group

[[gi...]]

Today is my 8 month anniversary (yeah!!) and to my surprise something good happened: After a night of very little sleep, I had a lovely day during which I didn't feel particularly unwell and it's been a good long time since that's happened, like years. I had a nice day, though at first I was really tired, but it got better over the course of the day and I don't even feel all that awful now. Wow that's something for me. That's really something, so who knows what's happening, but it's not bad and for this I am grateful. Happy holidays everyone!!!

And again (and again) thank you.

 

Verti, it's true, friendships are challenging always but especially throughout this ordeal. I just came back from my knew knitting group where I just learned to knit (at scarf level, fun) and the conversation covered so many different and challenging topics, it was terrifically satisfying. A great group of people, truly stellar, who are comfortable looking around the room and saying "wow this is a great group of people". I got very very lucky. I have been lately. I've been privy to some very warming kindnesses. That includes here. 

 

Yep, it's a good day.

 

xxm

 

[[ve...]]

Hope all my post benzo buddies have a great New Year and may the healing continue to it's fruition in 2011 .

 

Vertigo (no more)

[[...]]

 

I have not updated in a while as I feel I sound a bit like a broken record, but here goes.

 

I just reached the six month point off of benzos.  I am not sure what I expected at this point, but I think deep down everyone "hopes" they will be the one to heal at this point.

 

Here is what I still have left..

 

1)random muscle twitching/inner viberations (it is often hard to distinguish between the two)

2) occasionaly nerve pain (this was constant in the early going)

 

To see just these two symptoms...you would think..."hey, that is great" and maybe it is...but I have been dealing with these two symptoms since the early days of the taper, so it has been well over a year of these symptoms and I am just about ready to tell them to take a hike.

 

I know it is just nerve bundles firing off...nerve endings....and that in time...weeks, months, a year or whatever it will fix itself...but like the rest of you guys, I just want to wake up and not feel these weird sensations...

 

I wish everyone continued healing in 2011...and I hope we all reach the promised land of complete healing in 2011...

 

Thanks to everyone for the support on my journey...

 

TC

[[gi...]]

Hi TC,

 

I know how hard it is not to be frustrated, and to then look at how far you've come only to see how much farther you have to go. I know, because I'm right there with you. Mind you, I'm 18 months ahead of you, but I know how I felt at 6 months out and it was discouraging. But you're doing so much better than I was at this point - I'd finally gotten down to "only" 19 symptoms at 6 months - so I don't think there's any reason to think that you won't be out of this hell before long.

 

Me, I'm kind of in limbo, some of my remaining symptoms not as bad, but there still nonetheless. My 2 year mark is next week. Expect a 2-year retrospective in my blog

 

Happy New Year everyone -

 

ginger

[[...]]

Ginger,

 

I am looking forward to reading that in your blog.  I have learned more from my friends here than I ever learned from any of the "expert" doctors out there.   I hope the two year point brings you continued healing and I hope 2011 is the year for you to reach 100 percent.  I am hopeful that next Christmas will be better for many of us, than this Christmas.

 

I probably will continue to sound like a broken record for a while with these few remaining symptoms, but hopefully, in time, they get tired and leave.

 

Hugs,

 

TC

[[Ma...]]

Congratulations to all of us who got off in 2010 (and everyone else for that matter) but I have to say I am so much better off now than I was at this time last year, it's mind blowing. That said, I know I'm delicate and need to handle myself with kid gloves. There isn't anything about 2010 I won't be happy to forget so here's to 2011:

may it fulfill all our hopes for healing and health and happiness... why not?

 

Happy New Year Everyone and thanks again for all the help and support!!

xxm

[[Mi...]]

Congratulations to all of us who got off in 2010 (and everyone else for that matter) but I have to say I am so much better off now than I was at this time last year, it's mind blowing. That said, I know I'm delicate and need to handle myself with kid gloves. There isn't anything about 2010 I won't be happy to forget so here's to 2011:

may it fulfill all our hopes for healing and health and happiness... why not?

 

Happy New Year Everyone and thanks again for all the help and support!!

xxm

 

Couldn't have said it better! 

[[gi...]]

Congratulations to all of us who got off in 2010 (and everyone else for that matter) but I have to say I am so much better off now than I was at this time last year, it's mind blowing. That said, I know I'm delicate and need to handle myself with kid gloves. There isn't anything about 2010 I won't be happy to forget so here's to 2011:

may it fulfill all our hopes for healing and health and happiness... why not?

 

Happy New Year Everyone and thanks again for all the help and support!!

xxm

 

Couldn't have said it better! 

 

Ditto! 

[[fa...]]

Yay Marina, that is so NICE, thanks    Happy New Year to You!

[[ca...]]

Congratulations to all of us who got off in 2010 (and everyone else for that matter) but I have to say I am so much better off now than I was at this time last year, it's mind blowing. That said, I know I'm delicate and need to handle myself with kid gloves. There isn't anything about 2010 I won't be happy to forget so here's to 2011:

may it fulfill all our hopes for healing and health and happiness... why not?

 

Happy New Year Everyone and thanks again for all the help and support!!

xxm

 

Very nice! 

[[mi...]]

width=420 height=80http://www.ezticker.com/ticker/2036/644/20100120/my+escape.+/ticker.png[/img]

 

11 months and 11 days today

i feel pretty good

 

happy new year

[[...]]

Hey Mike,

 

Congrats on your 11-11.

 

At what point did you feel you turned the corner?  I am at six months off of a taper.  The first couple months were a suckfest. The last month or two, things seem to be changing for the better.  I realize that at any time things can change, so I don't get too hyped about the good stuff, but I am hopefully 2011 will be a better year than 2010.

 

TC

[[mi...]]

Hey Mike,

 

Congrats on your 11-11.

 

At what point did you feel you turned the corner?  I am at six months off of a taper.  The first couple months were a suckfest. The last month or two, things seem to be changing for the better.  I realize that at any time things can change, so I don't get too hyped about the good stuff, but I am hopefully 2011 will be a better year than 2010.

 

TC

 

hi TC

 

happy new year!

 

like you my first few months off were indeed Hellish (mainly with mental sx of depression, fear, paranoia, rage, anger = you name it)

then i started to notice breaks where i felt decent and my old attitude and mental outlook was back

from then on it just got better and better .. if i had to put a time frame on it i'd say Months 7-9

 

my physical sx were always pretty much non-existent

i have been able to sleep well for a long time (before i ended the taper)

 

i really believed i would never come out of it.  desperation was my middle name, first name and last name

 

2011 will be better for you . this stuff does go away

i was a huge xanax abuser / user (up to 10-12-16 mgs a day for almost 5 years)

 

all the best

 

M

[[gi...]]

My kitty Luna says ...

 

http://i680.photobucket.com/albums/vv170/gingerlp_photos/e441eb37-4b2e-452d-b5af-1d8f34aef389.jpg

[[ki...]]

Hi There Everyone,

 

Just stopped by to say that healing happens.  I'm off klon 1 year and 5 months with no s/x.  I'm tapering off Ambien with no problems except a little insomnia.  Take heart, you will be well soon.

 

Love to all,

 

Kitty

[[ve...]]

Great to see you Kitty.  That's fabulous news.  Good luck with the rest of the ambien taper. I'm two months behind you at 13 months and feeling about 95% (some symptoms are 100% gone or better than before benzos ).  I'm  about to taper off prilosec next week.  I guess we're still tapering buddies afterall .  Wishing you and your family a happy and healthy new year.

 

 

Vertigo (no more)

[[of...]]

Hey, this is a great thread   i'm heading into fourteen months and life is good.  It's hard to tell now , when i feel lousy  if it's just life stuff or benzowithdrawal.  I choose to believe it's not benzo withdrawal,  the memory is fading and things are really great.  I applaud all of you, all of us, this is a hard won battle but the other side is just so great.  Congrats to all of you and Happy New Year.

 

Katie xo

[[19...]]

I keep reading about people here who took huge doses of benzos for years and say they feel 90% after only 6-12 months yet I only took 1mg Xanax for two lousy months and I feel worse 2 years later then when I was out a year WTF??? Does this mean I am perminitly screwed? I have lost two years of my life and been a horrible father to my 3 year old daughter because I never feel well enougph to play with her!

 

 

[[ca...]]

I keep reading about people here who took huge doses of benzos for years and say they feel 90% after only 6-12 months yet I only took 1mg Xanax for two lousy months and I feel worse 2 years later then when I was out a year WTF??? Does this mean I am perminitly screwed? I have lost two years of my life and been a horrible father to my 3 year old daughter because I never feel well enougph to play with her!

 

 

1973 sorry to hear you are still feeling sick at 2 years out.    I don't know your history, but are you on any other meds? Did you take anything else throughout these past 2 years? What are your remaining symptoms? Everyone heals differently and at different rates, so I hope you see some big improvements soon, hang in there.

[[19...]]

Thanks! No other meds, tried a few (Neurotin & Ambien) just one time each and they both put me into the instant shaking and shivering  :'(

 

My current symptoms are felling cold and can't stop shivering and shaking, this comes in waves every few weeks or months but last week I had like 5 days in a row worse then the firt month of CT!

 

I also just feel like crap all the time!! Tired, no appetite, waking up with anxiety none of these things I had before the Xanax! I also believe I had sometype of partial seziure last month and I am going in for an MRI tomorrow to rule some things out.

 

Have you ever heard of anyone feeling worse 2 to 3 years and then they recover 100%?

[[ca...]]

1973 have you had any blood work/tests done to rule other things out? Have you had your thyroid etc checked? Just trying to think of some things that could possibly help or be ruled out. I have heard of some taking longer to heal, but have never heard of anyone having issues permanently so take comfort that you will heal too.

[[19...]]

All blood work is perfect! I am the healthiest sick person on earth  :'( Guess it's just going to take more time how much well that's the million dollar question? Glad to hear that your saying that everyone eventually heals just sucks when most who took much higher doses for much much longer are getting better much faster!

[[gi...]]

I keep reading about people here who took huge doses of benzos for years and say they feel 90% after only 6-12 months yet I only took 1mg Xanax for two lousy months and I feel worse 2 years later then when I was out a year WTF??? Does this mean I am perminitly screwed? I have lost two years of my life and been a horrible father to my 3 year old daughter because I never feel well enougph to play with her!

 

 

 

Hey 1973,  look for Nurse Tanya's blog. She only took benzos for a couple months and is still doing this dance, 2 years later. She'd probably like to hear from you! Tell her I sent you.

 

ginger

[[Nu...]]

Thanks Ginger for sending him my way. nice to hear of someone going through the same crap after only taking it in "moderation".

[[...]]

Hey 1973,

 

Just because it is taking you a bit longer to heal, does NOT mean you will not heal.  You will get there in due time, not as fast as you wanted to, but you WILL get there.  There are several stories on various forums of people who took 2 years or longer to heal, and they fully recovered.  This is not the "norm", but as weird as benzo withdrawal is, even defining a "norm" is difficult.  You will get your life back, I wish I could say exactly when, but it will happen.  There are some people who never experience a window and just wake up one day, and things are gone.  I don't know why it happens that way for some, but it does.  Perhaps some day in the near future you will wake up and this whole ordeal is over.  It could happen just like that.

 

Hang in there..keep healing..

 

TC