Post Benzo Freedom Withdrawal Support Group

[[gi...]]

Thanks everyone for the advice!!

ginger

[[ve...]]

51 weeks post benzo and feeling pretty good.  I look forward to posting my one year update next week .

 

Best wishes,

 

Vertigo (no more)

[[...]]

Well, Vertigo, perhaps there is something about the one year mark. I'm 49 weeks off now, myself, and over the last seven days I feel like I've returned home ( to myself). After a hairy period of anxiety - which was brought on at least some what by the use of B vitamins supplement - the last six days have been great - feeling as I remember life was before benzos. I think what happened to me for most of October was my annual seasonal distress time. As beautifull as the fall is around these parts, it always puts me on edge; Now that we're passing through into actual winter, I'm feeling lots better. In fact, right now sleep is bountiful.

I too am looking forward to my first anniversary at the end of the month.

[[le...]]

Hey Bill!  This is such GREAT news!  I am so glad for you!  I am not sure if I even can remember what I was like pre-benzo.  That was SO long ago for me!  Hopefully, I will know what returning HOME feels like   But I am happy that you remember!  And I hope it only gets more and more "clear"!  Hooray for you!

 

~Leena

[[gi...]]

Ginger,

 

Just posted some info in the General Health & Wellbeing section. I was going to give you all the information, from my notes, but that link saved me from having to type it all.

 

Mike

 

Mike I looked but can't find it. Can you send me the link to the exact page? thanks!

[[ve...]]

Well, Vertigo, perhaps there is something about the one year mark. I'm 49 weeks off now, myself, and over the last seven days I feel like I've returned home ( to myself). After a hairy period of anxiety - which was brought on at least some what by the use of B vitamins supplement - the last six days have been great - feeling as I remember life was before benzos. I think what happened to me for most of October was my annual seasonal distress time. As beautifull as the fall is around these parts, it always puts me on edge; Now that we're passing through into actual winter, I'm feeling lots better. In fact, right now sleep is bountiful. I too am looking forward to my first anniversary at the end of the month.

 

Good to hear that things are turning around for you Bill.  Makes sense that some of the upswing in  issues could have been related to seasonal change.  I have seasonal allergies and have noticed some minor health changes.  Are you guys already into winter?  What part of the country are you in?   It takes a little longer here in the South to get to winter.  By the way,  I also stopped the B complex last week, but I'm continuing with niacin at least til next week's blood test, will see how the HDL cholesterol turns out. Sleep is better than pre benzos for me too .  Sounds like we're both headed in the right direction at almost one year off .

 

Best,

 

Vertigo (no more)

[[...]]

Leena, As they say you can never step into the same river twice. What I mean when I say I am back to being pre Benzo is I'm free of the sx's I believe were connected to the wd and Benzo use, but I hope that the experience has helped me to grow.

 

Vertigo, I'm up here in NYC. Every year , starting in late September, I get an edgy, uneasy feeling...I believe that  combined with the two week supplement use threw me off course. I think that is the hall mark of my withdrawal, that as long as nothing unusual happens, I can maintain my inner balance. But when things happen - i.e. a virus, a lot of social activity - or the B vitamins - I get sort of overly shaken up.

[[Re...]]

  Hooray bill for heading toward the 1 year mark!  When I hit my 1 year mark in September (2010) my insomnia was still screwy...I did get kind of weary because I thought my sleep issues were going to vanish once I reached a year.  October came in very nicely for me because the insomnia started changing into quality sleep; the insomnia started to take a back seat to real sleep.  I'm looking for greater healing at the 18 month/24 month marks.

 

Happy upcoming anniversary to those who are nearing it!

 

Stay the course!

Retire2010

[[gi...]]

Congratulations Retire!! 

I'm at the 23 month mark and unfortunately not the in the same place as you.

ginger

[[...]]

Retire, That's great about your better sleep. You know, there's a whole lot of people around here who finished their tapers right around last thanksgiving - myself included. A lot of anniversaries comin' up.

[[Mi...]]

Wow!  Bill, Vertgo and Retire at 1 year off.  I'm so envious!

[[ve...]]

Yep, six more days to go

 

Cheers,

 

Vertigo (no more)

[[Re...]]

Ginger,  I'm sorry that things are moving slowly for you, but we are worlds better than we were last year.

 

bill, last Thanksgiving I was sooo sick.  I managed to cook Thanksgiving dinner for the family and afterwards took to my bed with depression, fatigue, horrible tinnitus, and no appetite; this lasted for 2 horrible weeks. My husband and sons urged me to not worry about preparing Thanksgiving dinner, but I was determined.  What a difference a year makes.

 

Vertigo, we are counting down with you.  In 2 days I'll have have another month under my belt!

 

Missy, the more months that pass, the better I feel. These are the kind of anniversaries that you look forward to. 

 

 

[[Ma...]]

Counting down with you Verti, what a milestone, a whole year! That said, it does remind me, I am a world of difference better than I was last year at this time. What a mess! Though I do seem to be one of those that has to be through all the levels of healing "out loud", my system is very vocal when displeased and it isn't happy. I swear last night I thought I was coming down with shingles, the pain through my body, the soreness and spasming everywhere, the itchiness, I thought oh dear god no. But today is much the same and better than last night so hopefully I ducked that bullet, I know it's happened to quite a number of people. The cognitive business is AWFUL! and so obvious now, I was trying to remember the name of someone the other day and was at such a loss that a friend of mine tried to jump start my brain by asking "Can you name the gender?". I could. THat was it. I seem to be going through a phase that's very physical again after a more emotional one. Who knows. I only hope this stops. I hear people saying how month to month the feel so much better and here I am saying I'm actually feeling quite a bit worse at nearly 7 months as compared to how I felt at 5.

Anyway, thanks for listening. Hope I hear back "Oh yes yes, that happened to me, I felt awful for a while around 7 months and then "poof" all gone!". Well, I can dream...

Have a good one ya'll, oh and by the way, none of this is stopping me from carrying on, no matter how hard or crazy it is, we gotta keep going.

xxm

[[gi...]]

Hi Marina,

 

I like your attitude! Good for you, for handling this so well at 7 months, despite the setbacks.  I definitely stalled and even swapped out some symptoms around months 8-9 and then crept forward slowly to my 1 year mark. I've completely stalled again but I'm just living with my symptoms better than I was back in the days of "why is this happening / will it ever end" (we all know those days, don't we?!). A good friend of mine here told me that she felt worse at months 18-24 than she had in a year, but then everything turned around and now she's feeling almost normal. So you just never know.  Maybe your CNS is in the throes of its last battle before it breaks free! 

 

Keep pushing girlfriend. It's nice to see someone else who's not letting this stop her.

 

ginger

[[Ma...]]

Oh Ginger, thank you so much, do you feel better at one year out than you did when you stalled at 7-8 months?

 

I know, we're all different, and some people even feel little change seemingly forever and then BAM, all at once. I think I'm getting to the point where I've heard nearly everything. Funny how you do keep needing to hear the positive stuff again and again. Your telling me your story really will buoy me for another two months!

 

I remind myself that it doesn't matter, that I can moan and whine or not because time is going to pass just the same. Congratulations on getting to one year off. It goes by so fast. This is Benzo Time, Benzo Healing Time, it's different.

THanks again!!! (or did I say that lol)

xxm

[[Be...]]

Wow!  Bill, Vertgo and Retire at 1 year off.  I'm so envious!

 

Congrats, guys 

[[Be...]]

Funny how you do keep needing to hear the positive stuff again and again.

 

I feel exactly the same way, Marina.  I find myself constantly needing a reminder that this will get better with time.  Thank goodness for BenzoBuddies, eh?

 

Keep fighting the good fight, buddies 

[[gi...]]

Oh Ginger, thank you so much, do you feel better at one year out than you did when you stalled at 7-8 months?

 

I know, we're all different, and some people even feel little change seemingly forever and then BAM, all at once. I think I'm getting to the point where I've heard nearly everything. Funny how you do keep needing to hear the positive stuff again and again. Your telling me your story really will buoy me for another two months!

 

I remind myself that it doesn't matter, that I can moan and whine or not because time is going to pass just the same. Congratulations on getting to one year off. It goes by so fast. This is Benzo Time, Benzo Healing Time, it's different.

THanks again!!! (or did I say that lol)

xxm

 

Well.... uh... I hate to tell you this but I'm 23 months out. I'm down to only 6 persistent symptoms, so I'm definitely better than I was at 6 months. But I haven't made any improvement this second year.  I had to take narcotics after surgery in March, and then I took a small dose of ambien a couple months later, and those two events brought back some old symptoms and made existing ones worse. Until then, though, I felt I was improving. Now I'm just stalled at 80%.

 

I love your philosophy about time! It happens regardless; I love it!

 

ginger

[[Ma...]]

Thanks again Ginger, I'd be so so happy with 80% wow, though I'm sure you want to just be done with it. Me, I'm dragging around the bottom of the barrel these days. Same thing though, in the sense that I was doing great and then had some "interference" though in my case, I'm not eve sure what caused it, there were a couple of factors, anyway, that was about 6 weeks ago and I'm only just really getting back on my feet so who knows. Problem though is that what may have triggered this might have been the hair color I've been using for years and years without issue and well, it's nearly time again (like I said, there were other factors, intense stress and I was doing Nutri System to lose the Benzo weight, which I mostly did, but something in the stuff was making me awful sic).... I'm going to wait and see how I feel. Still feel like I've been beaten savagely but at least I got some sleep so I can cope. Good day all.

m

[[gi...]]

Hey Marina,

 

You might be on to something with the hair coloring but I bet the NutraSystems diet had more to do with your setback.  There are a lot of chemicals and additives in all packaged foods, moreso diet foods. During my "early days" I found I couldn't tolerate anything processed or any supplements. Also, right now your body is burning more protein than usual, so you could be feeling that, too, if you were only eating the diet food.

 

Wow, your attitude is really great!  I hope you feel better soon (that, of course, being a totally relative statement  )!

 

ginger

[[Ma...]]

I'll bet you're right. THat's what I'm guessing too. I'll see how I feel in 4 more weeks. Thinking of going natural but the last time I tried it I looked in the mirrow, said "over my dead body" and booked an appointment ASAP> the stone will read "death by vanity".

I have a good attitude off and on... but thanks Ginger. To be or not to be blond, that is the question (and if that's the worst of it, man, am I ahead!)

m

[[gi...]]

I can't tolerate most hair colorings because I have sensitive skin. I've found Aveda, which uses natural products, to be really good and not irritating at all. Is there an Aveda salon near you?  They're pricey but you get what you pay for!

 

Have a good day -

 

ginger

[[st...]]

Hi Marina,

 

It's good to hear from you.  I got slammed at the 7 month mark off date.....started getting better than then got hit again on the 11th month.  Such a surprise.  None of us know how long this process will take but we will get there.  Just gotta take it week by week and sometimes even month by month.  Had to laugh at "death by vanity".  I agree.

 

Patty  xo

[[Ma...]]

Hey Ginger, here's the funny thing, Aveda is the worst for me, go figure, no idea why. Something in the color. it bothered me terribly the first time I tried it 10 years ago. Can't use any of the stuff for blondes, not even conditioner. Go figure. Good ol' paint peeling bleach, oh yeah, that's the stuff for me.... or it was. ahhhh.

Wow, it's amazing, I feel kind of ok and then suddenly there's this odd faint feeling I can't explain like I'm drying out from the inside out. My whole body just droops and wants to drag me floorward. Got out to buy groceries today. Big day. Bigger than yesterday. This is amazing.

Yep, it's going to be a long haul for me I suspect but I'm also going into menopause as we speak and I know for some women it can be positively hellish. I suspect going through both at the same time is the problem. I'm some kind of genius.

Ok have a good night all and thanks again for the positive reinforcement. It'll take the time it takes I guess, but something tells me that the fewer "episodes" I can have the faster this will all go, but I could be wrong. Am I wrong....?

Meaning, if I think it's possible that I could react to the bleach, it would be best for my recovery to avoid it just in case? Or does it matter??

These are questions it would be nice to have the answers to it seems.

But then it wouldn't be the crap shoot we know and love, now would it.

ah.

Night.

m