help

[[Ta...]]

so I was on . 5 ativan 3 times a day for a year. on my second attempt I finally made the switch to Valium. I've probably been on it for 4 weeks now. the first two I was very sedated . the next two weeks were the best I've felt all year. but my doctor takes me down 1 mg every 2 weeks. now I feel like shit and I can't seem to figure out how long it takes for it to " build up" I'm having extremely suicidal thoughts and my brain feels like there's an ice pack on top or ice inside of it. this can't be normal. and I've only dropped 2 mg . how long does it take to stabilize after a drop

[[Ta...]]

ps now on 13 mugs of diazapam

[[be...]]

so I was on . 5 ativan 3 times a day for a year. on my second attempt I finally made the switch to Valium. I've probably been on it for 4 weeks now. the first two I was very sedated . the next two weeks were the best I've felt all year. but my doctor takes me down 1 mg every 2 weeks. now I feel like shit and I can't seem to figure out how long it takes for it to " build up" I'm having extremely suicidal thoughts and my brain feels like there's an ice pack on top or ice inside of it. this can't be normal. and I've only dropped 2 mg . how long does it take to stabilize after a drop

 

Taikamiya44,

 

It sounds like maybe you are reducing your dose too rapidly. In just a few weeks you have gone from feeling the best you ever have in your life, to having suicidal thoughts. Suicidal ideation is often associated with trying to stop too rapidly. It is also much more difficult to stabilize when the reduction is too quick.

 

 

The feelings and thoughts you are having are the product of withdrawal. I know firsthand how frightening they can be. I had these thoughts in my early withdrawal.

 

Again, please get help if you feel you may act on your thoughts .  Here is a link to our Suicide and Self-harm links page:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/resources/suicide-self-harm/

 

Take Care,

 

benzos-R-cruel

 

 

[Guest [Mi...]]

Hi, Taikamiya44.

 

Please look over the resources that BC posted and if you are feeling suicidal, reach out for support. In order to heal you must first survive.

 

Not everyone is able to do a crossover. Do you think it would be easier to switch back to Ativan? Suicidal depression when switching over to Valium has been reported by many members, so please do not act on the suicidal impulses.

 

Post updates and let us know how you're doing. 

[[Ta...]]

no I feel better overall on the Valium I feel more calm all the time . when I cut from 1.5 ativan to 1.3 it was horror. then I swithed to diazapam and I felt calm all day compared to the ups and downs of ativan. but now I've reduced only 2 mgs and it's driving me a bit crazy I'm having terrible mood swings . I wonder how long I'll take to stabilize

[Guest [Mi...]]

Hi. Have you talked to your doc about holding? Is he/she open to giving you more control over your taper?

[[Di...]]

It would appear that even though this reduction may be what is recommended, it is too much for you. Everyone is individual and you should never be forced to stick to a tapering plan that isn't working for you.

 

You felt okay on the valium, so I see no reason at all to switch back to Ativan. The trick now is to find a reduction method that is going to work a lot better for you, and that's obviously not dropping 1mg every 2 weeks. If you can't handle that kind of drop now, it will only get worse as your dose gets lower.

 

At this point you have 2 choices. You can continue to hold at your current dose, and hopefully things will settle in a week or two's time. However, if you have only just done the most recent cut, you do have the option of going back up in dose a bit. A lot of people say you have about a 2 week window where an updose will work, after that it may not, but that's totally an individual thing. Updoses work for some people, and don't work for others.

 

If you are having suicidal thoughts you need to try to fix this issue asap. I personally would try doing the updose of the most recent 1mg drop, and see if you can stabilise more quickly. Then you need to talk to your doctor and tell him/her that this type of cut is too much for you.

 

My preferred way is to cut as small as possible and just do it more often. If it's possible to cut 0.25mg or maybe 0.5mg then I would try that first and see how you feel. If that isn't working for you, the next best thing (and always my preferred method overall anyway) is to switch to doing a daily liquid taper. Some people are just so sensitive to this benzo crap that this is the only way they can taper. I was one of those people.

 

If you need more information on how to do a daily liquid taper, just check out the links I have in my signature below.